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Paradox_machine

27 M North Port, FL

My Details

Last Online
Dec 13, 2013
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Never
Religion
Christianity, and very serious about it
Sign
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Pets
Speaks
English (Fluently), Japanese (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
...I know you're here for Mike's profile, and that will come shortly. You need to know that Mike doesn't particularly care for online profiles, but since he is such an amazing guy, all of his girl friends have gotten together to encourage him to put himself out there again. Everything below is from Mike except the last section, in which we put together a series of references from all of us who care about him. But before he gets started we wanted to share one of those references from his sister Terry:

Michael recently asked his four older sisters requesting a "reference letter" for a dating profile that was being compiled by his friend. I have put off doing this project to the very last day as I did not really know what to say or what type of format he wanted this letter. I then requested some examples. Upon reading these references from his friends I had a good laugh and a good cry. You see, if you only knew my brother and how very special he is, you would know that you would be the luckiest girl in the world to go on just one date with him and that these letters, although a great reference, can never represent my brother as the magnificent person that he is.

My relationship with my little brother has not always been one where I looked up to him as I do now. We grew up in a large family with 5 children, Mikey being the youngest. I was number 4, just 2 years older than him. We were always put together in things. The 3 oldest girls got to do the older kid stuff and we got stuck with the kiddie stuff...rides and happy meals. I always wanted to be with the older girls...I wanted to grow up and leave my little brother to the "kid stuff". Then one day my little brother became an adult. I'm not really sure when it happened. When did he become this man full of wisdom? When did he become the brother that I can go to when I have a problem? Sometimes I think I want to go back to the time when we were eating the kids meals and too short to ride the adult rides....but then I realize the world would be lost without the adult version of my kid brother.

My little brother is the best. Yes, if you date him, you will be inundated with questions and probably feel interrogated by his friends and family. But truly, the reason is because we love him so much and we want the best for him. He deserves a wonderful girl. If you are this girl...if you are the lucky one that falls in love with my brother and my brother reciprocates, you are very special. Once the interrogation is over, we will love you too. You will become a 5th sister in our large, loving family.

My brother is cute and smart and loving. He puts on a masculine face, but is sensitive to girls' feelings...he probably knows girls better than any other guy I know. He is funny. Oh! Is he funny!!! He can make me laugh whenever I call him! He plays the coolest video games and he knows so much about computers. He is well read and physically fit!...you see, he exercises his mind as well as his body. You might think with all of these awesome qualities, he is a worldly guy, but he devotes so much to God. He is ambitious and wonderful! If you are nice and pretty, you should date my brother.

Name: Brandi
Age: 28
Gender: Of the female persuasion

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
We met in church almost 10 years ago now. He was the cutie pie who sat with his family andwas reservedly quiet until you got to know him. He and my boy friend at the time had a mutual friend, so eventually we started running in the same circle - the circle that eventually became "the gang." Good times, good times.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
Somehow Mike's thread in the tapestry of life has woven itself parallel with mine. We are friends; we have much in common although we don't see each other a lot (primarily because of distance). I don't know that I have another friend with the same unconditional love that Mike displays toward his friends. It is for this reason (among others) that I feel blessed to have him in my life.

How would you describe him to another person?:
Unwaveringly loyal friend and confidant. Selfless and thoughtful once you get past the occasional cocky facade that I believe was erected, in a way, to protect his fragile heart. Fun-loving and free-spirited while remaining faithful to God. Handsome, chivalrous, and uber-geeky.

What impression has he made in your life?:
The first word that came to mind was PILLAR. I dunno, he's always just kind of....been there. Not always in the forefront, but there in a pinch at any time day or night. I respect and admire this quality in him and I hope to become more like that to those that I care about.

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
We never dated, although the attraction has been an undercurrent for years. He hasn't had the best luck with dating and I am sincerely hoping he will find the happiness and contentment that comes from being in a solid relationship. If you're his girl, be prepared to be showered with love and affection.

Anything else you would like to add?:
Kudos to you, and great choice, if you decide you'd like to be his girl. However, you'll have to pass the Friend Test in order to qualify. Applications are available in the lobby. There is a $250 fine if you fill out the application, get accepted, and then change your mind. No flaky flakes allowed.

Name: Stacey B
Age: 52
Gender: F

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
We met in a movie theater I spilled my popcorn, he was my knight and helped me pick it up and said it was the 5 second rule and I could still eat it. It was then I knew he was the love of my life…

In reality, we met at work we share an office. I have spent more time with him then I did with my own husband who passed away after 22 years. Michael was my knight in shining armor in helping me deal with that loss, not to mention helping with my own ex-boyfriends. He’s always there with a shoulder and a hug.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
I am his boss, or rather… I am his senior, we work side by side and he does all the heavy lifting, I would be and am often lost without him.

How would you describe him to another person?:
If I were 20 years younger I would encapsulate him in a bubble and never let him leave

What impression has he made in your life?:
He is the kindest, sweetest, most handsome man I know and there is no match for his integrity and honesty. He will cut off his big toe if you needed a transplant

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
Not applicable…too BAD : (

Any stories you might like to mention or anything else you would like to add?:
Yes… If you are a women between the ages of 22-30 you are a total fool not to grab him. He is one in a trillion.

Name: Katerina
Age: 23
Gender: female

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
I've known Mike for 4 years already. We met on-line.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
My name is Katerina and I am Russian, I met Mike accidentally on one of the web sites. It was very interesting for me to communicate with the person on the other side of the world. we were pen friends for a while, until I understood that I feel more than just friend's feelings for him.

How would you describe him to another person?:
The first thing that I liked in Michael was his sense of humor. He was very funny and kind, his jokes were so easy to understand even for a girl from totally different culture. He was also very polite and always found interesting topics to discuss, I was never bored with him, not a second.
He always treated me like a lady and was very attentive to my thoughts or my needs. Even though our relationships were through * , I felt like it was very real.
Mike is very generous person, he is a real gentleman. and i am still very thankful to him for being such a good person.

What impression has he made in your life?:
Now my heart is printed with the memories of Michael. I learned a lot from him. I learned to be stronger, be more confident and be faithful to people you love. Michael showed me that life should be full of interesting things and it is me who can make it interesting.
He also taught me to dream high. To dream about better things and to never lose my heart.

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
Yes, we dated. we had an Internet dating, and Internet love. Mike bought me tickets so that i could come to him in US, but for some reasons, i didn't do this. I broke up with him, because of my family's pressure. Not because it was something wrong with him.
And i regret it now.

Any stories you might like to mention or anything else you would like to add?:
I will never forget Michael, his smile that made me so happy and how loved i felt being his girlfriend.

Name: Katy
Age: 40
Gender: Female

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
I have known Mike for close to seven years now. We met when he came to play video games and hang out at the home of the guy I had been dating at the time.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
I am the Katy- the “Mama-bear” for our group of friends. I watch over and protect the cubs, worry about them when they are facing difficulties and celebrate them when they are triumphant. And if anyone hurts one of my cubs, they feel my wrath if I can reach them.

How would you describe him to another person?:
Quirky. Mike has a great sense of humor, is a loyal friend and above all an honorable man. (Unless you’re facing him in paintball or Unreal Tournament- then all bets are off!) A good man to have at your back, and a formidable enemy. He has a strength of character rarely seen these days. Above all, he’s a lot of fun to be around.

What impression has he made in your life?:
Mike has given me a friendship that I truly treasure, and a male role model that I feel my teenaged son can benefit from following.

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
We never dated- the age difference would make it more than just a little creepy for the both of us I think. If I were still in my 20’s there wouldn’t be a need for this questionnaire- all the other girls would be out of luck because I would have set my cap for him myself.

Any stories you might like to mention or anything else you would like to add?:
Turn him loose in the kitchen. Trust me. You’ll be ever so glad you did, and the mess is more than worth it!!!

Name: Stephanie C
Age: 21
Gender: female

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
We met in college, and it’s been around 4 years of serious friendship...

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
He is one of my closest friends and up till I got married my biggest crush-

How would you describe him to another person?:
Confident, knowledgeable, dependable and hilarious.

What impression has he made in your life?:
He has been the comic relief that I needed... he always made things that I thought was so terrible seem so minuscule, it is nearly impossible not to feel like a million bucks in the company of a guy like this..

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
We didn’t date per say… We had unofficial date like experiences. Outings, hangouts, and time together. Although he respected me and my emotions enough to never lay a hand on me.

Any stories you might like to mention or anything else you would like to add?:
I can’t tell you any stories because it’s all confidential... And unless you are a part of Bad Horse and his gang / and or know my true villain name... I’m sorry you just aren't privileged to know.

Name: Terry Kramer
Age:
Gender: F

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
I'd say about a year and a half. I was invited to one of his awesome Halo parties by a mutual friend. Actually I may have met years him earlier at another mutual friend's 30th bday party but we didn't interact much lol.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
Hmm I'm Terry, and I enjoyed many gaming and movie opportunities at his house :)

How would you describe him to another person?:
He seems kind of quiet at first but polite and friendly, has an odd taste in shows and movies, kicks ass in halo, a great cook, has an awesome selection of [CENSORED], and hates being tagged in photos.

What impression has he made in your life?:
He made Sarasota a far less boring place to hang out in :)

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
never dated, but he looks pretty good without a shirt ;}

Anything else you would like to add?:
Nope

Name: John K
Age: (Censored)
Gender: All Man Baby! (Or "man-baby" for short)

How long have you known Michael and how did you meet?:
2 years this month. We met in a cold citadel. He was a grizzled war veteran with a body count in the tens of thousands, I was fresh recruit hoping to just survive the day. Barely able to control my weapon let alone run without tripping over myself. Suffice to say, I died. A lot.

Who are you and what kind of relationship do you have with him?:
I'm still not sure who I am. I'm still on a journey to find myself, though that journey is taking forever because I have to make frequent long stops and root around for change to buy gas before I can continue on. To him I probably seem like the old creepy guy who lives upstairs.

How would you describe him to another person?:
I would describe him using my usual rambling barely coherent language focusing on mostly superficial details at first then adding little odd fact lets as they eventually pop into memory. Be prepared for some repetitiveness as I tend to forget that I already said something, and then eventually even forget what I was originally talking about anyway. But enough about me.....wait.

What impression has he made in your life?:
Aside from the life-debt I owe him for saving my life when I was about to be overrun by a hoard of zombies in L4D?

If you dated him, how did it end and how do you feel now?:
N/A - I would make a joke here, but another of our friends has used up all the allotment of "those kind" of jokes, so there's a moratorium on them for the next few months.

Anything else you would like to add?:
479 + 892

Name: Leigh (Sister)
My brother has given me, and all of my family some incredibly happy and joyous moments over the years. He was a delight to grow up with, and has always provided us with some memorable moments. Having known him all his life, I have a huge library of stories to leave him embarrassed and humiliated, but out of respect for him, I have decided not to tell them (quite yet). But I can tell you that he is a special brother. He's the fun uncle that my kids to look up to. He has always been caring and protective of all the women in his life and with one (amazing) mom, four sisters, and nine nieces, Michael has learned a thing or two about women. We are all eager to welcome another sister into our family once he finds the one who will win his heart (as long as you are willing to babysit at the drop of at hat (for free)).

Name: April (Sister)

My brother--- He is an unwavering pillar of the community, having a proclivity for inspiring hope and spreading God's word. He prefers Degas to Picasso; and Michael's brush strokes are far more alluring. He understands the coefficient of friction and uses it to his glorious advantage. He can solve a Rubik's Cube in 20 seconds with his feet, socks on or off. He knows first hand that even a bad day is better than a sharp stick in the eye or hot coals under the feet. His personality is so magnetic, he cannot carry credit cards. Benjamin Netanyahu lists him as his emergency contact. David Tennant wishes he had Michael's hair. Time Lords want to travel with him. He has never been on hiatus--from epic adventure. He has won the lifetime achievement award---twice. He has been surfing in a hurricane and the eye of that passing hurricane winked at him. He can start a fire using ice. He knows all the words to The Star Spangled Banner and can sing them, perfect pitch, better than Bette Midler. He has picked apples with Shel Silverstein. Children adore him. He has preformed a tracheotomy with a paper clip and a straw. He created an elaborate four course meal for the king of Albania using only a pocket knife and a toaster. He can hurl bocce balls at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. Using only a fork and an eye dropper, he once single-handedly defended a small village in the Falkland Islands from a horde of voracious army ants. He ran with the bulls in Pamplona. He has dove from the cliffs of Algarve in Portugal. He started a book club that would have made Franklin Patrick Herbert, Jr. jealous. He gave Kate Winslet jewelry that she didn't throw away. He climbed the Great Wall of China carrying two quadriplegic children. He brought peace to two warring tribes on a remote Caribbean island by calming a tumultuous volcano. He has hugged a frisky stingray and guided a nest of emerging turtles to the sea. He debated the second amendment with Scalia and Roberts. He is a treasure finder, not a treasure hunter. He beats Michael Phelps at Marco Polo. What he hasn't done-- is find the love of the perfect woman for him. You may ask--- Has he REALLY accomplished all of this? Go on a date with him and find out. You won't be disappointed.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Living, learning & growing. I'm looking for adventure, and someone to share that with.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Absolutely nothing. I am a master of only being mediocre. However, I am marginally good at just about everything.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Cute, Quiet, and Funny... Kinda like ninjas.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Movie: Serenity, Fifth Element, Matrix, FAQ about Time Travel,
Writers: Michael Crichton, Issac Asimov, CS Lewis
Show: Big Bang Theory, GoT, Dr. Who, Firefly, BSG.
Music: Reel Big Fish, Classical, Oldies, Alternative.

Yea, I'm a nerd.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
"Never" is a strong word, and those are boringly obvious (Food, water, Air...)
"Things I would't be the same person without" is more interesting...

I hate being without broadband. But hey, who doesn't?
But being without the places and people I love would probably effect me the most. My home church, and Dojo. My Family, and best friends.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
The mistakes I've made and the people I've hurt... a weird answer I admit. Its the first thing that comes to mind. Its not a man's successes but his failures that are never forgotten. My absolute worst fear in life is hurting people, especially people close to me. I don't have too many major mistakes in life, but there is plenty of opportunities I've missed and a plethora of decisions I would like to redo. But the best I have is to keep moving forward.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Either chilling with friends or having a quiet, comforting evening at home.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm an open book and I don't have any problem admitting embarrassing details while things are still fairly anonymous. Oddly, It is when I've earned peoples trust and in some ways rely on their opinions that I find it harder admitting the things I find shameful. But if it were for someone I truly loved... It would be important to me that I could share everything In my heart. Good or Bad. So you will simply just have to ask.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Look, I'm here to explore the many relationship possibilities the interwebs has to offer. Just like everyone else I've got high hopes to meet my best friend and lover for the rest of my life. So Please don't hesitate to message me with anything you like. Let me know what you think. Hate mail is kindly accepted as well.