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26 Chicago, IL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18-27
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Nov 23
5' 9" (1.75m)
Body Type
Doesn’t have kids
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Oh boy, my summary! Time to show everybody how witty and sardonic I am, and use as many ten-dollar words and half-baked philosophical platitudes as possible. (is it just me, or are we all kind of getting that vibe?) sidetracked 2 seconds into filling this out. My name's Jay, I'm originally from Cincinnati, but living in Wicker right now, and i work for a web startup. Finishing up my bachelor's in marketing this semester. I originally started as a film major, then switched majors for practicality purposes. (My brother works for Nielsen, and I love me some nepotism.) I know, I know... I 'SOLD OUT, MAAAAN.'

I used to do standup, but I never was paid in anything other than beer in chicago. I worked at a club and made a living (the dream!) as a comic in Cincinnati for awhile, but it wasn't as glamorous as it sounded and it made me nuts, so I moved back here because I love this city. Creatively, now I just record songs that I occasionally get to perform. ('God Only Knows'-type chords with distortion.. usually trying to take the piss out of self-aggrandizement by mocking it in some way.)

Slightly neurotic/usually have a commentary going on in my head about whatever's happening around me. I used to make that commentary audible until one day a friend of mine said 'FUCK man, we get it, you're SOOoooOoo much smarter than everyone else. Shut up, already'

So I realized I was often being mis-interpreted as a cocky, mouthy, egomaniac.. and I've tempered that OCD urge a bit, since. Though at the root of me, I know that most of what I say is well-intentioned and often mis-interpreted. I have no superiority complex whatsoever and live by 1 rule: Be kind and treat everyone equal. (I sound like a corny bumper-sticker, but it's true.)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Right now? Over-analyzing the shit out of this question.

(in a larger sense, see above.)
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
It always feels gross and narcissistic to list off what I'm 'good at'.. it feels like the first class of the first day of high school.. Like one of those forced, 'get to know each other' games that the teacher would instigate.

It also feels like I'm filling out my resume. So, how's this?

- Possesses strong leadership skills.
- Proficient at Social Networking.
- Proficient in Microsoft Word, and Excel.
- blahblahblah

(References available upon request.)
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I talk a lot. Pretty uninhibited. But I'm a good listener, too. (When sober. 4 beers in, I'm probably talking over people.)

And I'm often told I smell good. So, that.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Music: Elliott Smith, David Bowie, The Beatles, The Beach Boys, The Kinks, Ben Folds Five, Dr. Dog, Electric Light Orchestra, Nirvana, Radiohead, Led Zeppelin, The Velvet Underground, Of Montreal, A Tribe Called Quest, etc..

Movies: American Beauty, Buffalo '66, Mulholland Dr., Blue Velvet, Boogie Nights, Magnolia, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Being John Malkovich, Arizona Dream, Melancholia, Annie Hall, Manhattan, A Clockwork Orange, Vertigo, Fargo, No Country for Old Men, Idiocracy, etc..

Shows: Louie, Mr. Show with Bob and David, Curb Your Enthusiasm, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Books: David Foster Wallace.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I could do without 'em.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
All kinds of existential bullshit that I'm probably wasting my time on, but in all honesty it's my favorite pastime. I love having deep philosophical conversations where unique ideas are shared about societal trends, what the point of life is (It's to be happy. There-- I just saved you the trouble. You can put down your 1100 page high-brow book now, because Tolstoy doesn't know shit about your 2014 life), etc.

(Note: these philosophical conversations seemed more frequent back in my days of getting stoned, but I've sort of moved on from that phase of my life. Also, I'm not sure gushing about 'Dark Side of the Moon', and having all the ubiquitous thoughts it provokes are as interesting as I felt they were as a teenager, after doing 6 bong rips.. 'WTF is TIME, anyway? And MONEY?! Why IS it US and THEM..? WAIT DUDE, SHUT UP ECLIPSE IS ABOUT TO COME ON.')

Also my job, my future, blahblahblah. The banal 'I'm a grown-up' usuals..
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
There is no 'typical' Friday night, really. I'm usually at a bar, but I like to spend nights in..been doing that more lately, and I'm digging it.

I get more enjoyment out of hanging out in smaller groups where the conversation is less inhibited/more interesting.. getting to know somebody well over a drink is typically more fun than getting blitzed at a bar or someone's apartment whilst tagging each other's crass jokes, then realizing 'FUCK, I drove here!', and going through the tedious process of trying to flag down occupied and/or off-duty taxi cabs (all of them), before inevitably accepting the fact that you are walking home. Thankfully, we live in a climate where the average winter day is about 7 degrees, so it's always a pleasant stroll through the elements..
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I was like 12, I once selectively threw rocks at the lit-up sign for 'Bally Total Fitness', so that it just read 'BALL S'. (It was funny at the time.)
You should message me if
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and, most importantly..

(If you want to. Christ, is this question pointless..)