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31 Belmont, CA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 9:03pm
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
A little extra
Strictly anything
Not at all
Other, and laughing about it
Pisces, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from law school
Open relationship
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Dislikes dogs and dislikes cats
English (Fluently), Russian (Fluently), Japanese (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'd like to think that I'm a pretty interesting person in the abstract -- my background is in philosophy (at UCSC) with a healthy dollop of linguistics, and I worked for several years as a writer/translator/editor before going to law school (at UC Irvine). I have opinions about most things and they're pretty much guaranteed to be ones you'd never considered before.

However, I find that I'm usually not big on doing stuff that other humans seem to enjoy. I don't drink, don't smoke, don't do drugs, don't like being in loud places with lots of people... I dunno, I guess I'd always much rather sit around with one or two or three interesting people, brew a nice cup of tea (I'm kind of a tea snob), and watch a movie or play some videogames or debate questions that have no answers.

My body generally doesn't leave the house without a good reason, while my thinkmeats are Enkidu in the wilderness.

I have a rather wonderful significant other (frellasaurus, whose profile may or may not be visible at the moment), but our relationship is open for play with others (though not for additional romantic partners).

For explicitness: I am interested in making new friends with interesting interests; if some of those friends happen to come with benefits, that would also be great. You need not be interested in sleeping with me to message me. Similarly, a message from me doesn't necessarily mean I want to get in your pants -- more likely, I just think you're cool and that we'd have things to say to each other.

-- I've been to as many continents as I have American states.
-- I've bought tea at what's probably the oldest teahouse in the world.
-- I've been officially enrolled at 17 educational institutions for at least one term each.
-- I'm certified to teach English as a foreign language to adults.
-- I can "read" (that is, turn graphemes into phonemes, though not necessarily with access to the semantics) 7 different character sets/alphabets.
-- I don't know how to fart.

Oh, also, I've just recently gotten back into aikido, though I was away long enough that I'm basically starting from scratch. If aikido is something you do or are interested in doing, I'd love to have an aikido buddy in the area to help keep me accountable.

(If you do the FL thing, you can find me there at the same handle.)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Upgathering into the leap.

Just got back from visiting my consort in London, and looking forward to moving there more permanently in the next 3-4 months. But am eminently around in the Bay Area until then.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Tilting at windmills. Making you-had-to-be-there jokes that I totally can't communicate to you right now. Explaining stuff, even when I don't quite understand it myself. Listening to (though, sadly, not performing) music. Being totally OCD about grammar and other languagey things. Thinking I'm right and then actually having been right; admitting I'm wrong when I'm wrong and changing my opinions accordingly.

Also, portmanteaus. Also, bowling. Also, compersion.

Writing wholesome things like this (poetry).
Writing less wholesome things like this (smut).

Finally going to bed after the sun's come up.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My ladyfriend, when asked, said "your eyes and perfectly symmetrical face, curse you." I am unconvinced.

Honestly, probably my penchant for saying awful, awful things in ways that somehow make them funny or endearing instead of appallingly offensive.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Frank Herbert's "Dune" series, Neil Gaiman's "Sandman" series (and pretty much everything else he's written), Orson Scott Card's "Ender's Game" series, Nietzsche's "Thus Spoke Zarathustra," Heidegger's "Being and Time," Patrick Rothfuss' "Kingkiller" books, the Principia Discordia, the Illuminatus! Trilogy, Ursula K. Le Guin's "Earthsea" and "Hainish" series. See my Goodreads profile for a more complete list. A recent effort to read more books by nonwhite nondudes has brought me to Octavia Butler (who is good), Nnedi Okorafor (who is great), and N.K. Jemisin (who is fantastic).

Movies: The Fountain, Black Swan, Amelie, Six-String Samurai, The Cooler, Spirited Away, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Grave of the Fireflies, Happiness of the Katakuris, Dancer in the Dark.

Shows: Babylon 5, Game of Thrones, Mad Men, Community, Scrubs, Orphan Black, Suits, Wonderfalls, Firefly, Ergo Proxy, Avatar: The Last Airbender, House M.D., Boston Legal, Breaking Bad, Fullmetal Alchemist (and, of course, FMA: Brotherhood), the various Stargate shows.

Music: Tool, The Mars Volta, Dir en grey, Opeth, Otep, Tori Amos, Ani DiFranco, Ainjel Emme, Idan Raichel, APerfectCircle, Alexandrina Hristov, Animals As Leaders, Bjork, Depeche Mode, Diamanda Galas, Rodrigo y Gabriela, Miyavi.

Food: I can't handle foods of certain consistencies, including eggplant, tofu, and similarly mushy things; beyond that, I'm not terribly picky and generally appreciate food as an art form. I bake a mean poppy-seed cake and make tiramisu from scratch.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Numbers.
2. Words.
3. Grammar and syntax.
4. Thoughts to express by means of numbers and words, arranged in accordance with grammar and syntax so as to give rise to meaning.
5. People to whom to express these thoughts by the aforementioned means, and who in turn will reciprocally express thoughts at me.
6. Taking simple jokes, making them needlessly complicated, and running them into the ground.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
“Therefore, dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you. For those who are near you are far away… and this shows that the space around you is beginning to grow vast… be happy about your growth, in which of course you can’t take anyone with you, and be gentle with those who stay behind; be confident and calm in front of them and don’t torment them with your doubts and don’t frighten them with your faith or joy, which they wouldn’t be able to comprehend. Seek out some simple and true feeling of what you have in common with them, which doesn’t necessarily have to alter when you yourself change again and again; when you see them, love life in a form that is not your own and be indulgent toward those who are growing old, who are afraid of the aloneness that you trust… and don’t expect any understanding; but believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.”
― Rainer Maria Rilke
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Recovering from the week in a semi-vegetative state. Possibly wishing I were bowling. Using the somewhat archaic subjunctive. Squandering the shit out of my privilege. Avoiding social settings in which there are more people than can reasonably participate in a single conversation.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not at all a private person. I'm not sure what I wouldn't be willing to admit to. So ask away, if you like.

I think this image captures my personality to a startling extent.

Also, there's a (small) part of me that constantly feels like I should be apologizing for being a white, hetero, cismale dom-type. Instead, I just try to be less of an asshole.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I genuinely like most people, so if I visited your profile and didn't say hello, it's probably because something about your profile led me to conclude that you wouldn't enjoy hearing from me. If I was wrong about that, please let me know!

You should message me if I sound like a sufferable ass rather than an insufferable one.

If you're interested in people who are interesting in the ways in which I'm interesting, I'm interested in having you message me to express your interest.

Also, message me if you want to go bowling (and you'd like me to come bowling with you). Seriously. I'm a slut for bowling.

If you think this is awesome.