Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
If you were to ask me what kind of person I am, I'd respond by
saying my major motivation in life is to not be a total fruitcake.
You know, those horrible brick-like things made of crappy
ingredients that, for some reason, people give each other, people
say they like, but secretly they bury them in their backyard, shove
them in the closet next to their in-laws home-knit kitty sweaters,
or "re-gift" them to old senile grandpa Ernest.
Now If you're wondering what I’m looking for, honestly and kindness
are the most important things, especially when paired together. I
rather enjoy fake arrogance but I detest fake humility. You may be
the least critical person you know. You don’t judge people, or at
least try not to act on it when you do :) You understand the
importance of and are willing to endure the discomfort of speaking
honestly, hopefully with some degree of tact. You’re not entitled;
you don’t think that the world owes you things that it doesn’t owe
all other decent people. And perhaps most importantly, while you’ve
been humbled and disappointed by life, you haven’t let these
experiences jade you.
Suffice it to say, I'm looking for a great friend, a companion, and
a lover. Everything else is icing on the cake, although a good
sense of sarcastic humor may be a prerequisite.
A few additional quirks you’ll probably want to know include:
- I stop to pet animals when I see them. Like all the time.
Mid-conversation or with bags of groceries in hand. I just can't
resist the cuteness.
- I’m easily baited into conversations about philosophy,
psychology, science, and other nerdy stuff, although I promise not
to bore you unless you've been very very naughty.
- At times I've been known to break into fits of movie quoting,
kind of like a Jekyl and Hyde thing except I don’t wear a top hat
and kill people.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Volunteer work, grad school apps, non-profit office work,
I've recently started getting into mindfulness and meditation, as
part of my "trying to be the best version of myself" project.
Results are pending.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Fixing stuff. Productivity increases with beer and pizza.
Being way too sarcastic for my own good / aka putting my foot in my
Cooking (Def. passion of mine)
Abbreviating definite/definitely as def.
Being a space cadet.
Acting as source of cheap labor.
Taking the conversation to that next level
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My voice and how I should be in radio. Or is it ON radio? I can
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
As far as movies go, think Evil Dead + Shawshank Redemption + Being
John Malkovich + No Country for Old Men. I'm not sure what that
equals, but I'm willing to bet it'd be the shit.
I have a problem constantly reading non-fiction books. It's not a
big deal or anything; I just break out into hives and start
sweating if I don't. And then wake up in forest, naked, covered in
animal blood. Like I said, not a big deal.
Indie, Hip-hop, rock, classic rock, and alternative are all
Currently digging "Weight of Love" by The Black Keyes.
I've never met a well-made meal I didn't like.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
bag fries (aka bagglers),
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
What would happen if Pinocchio said, "My nose is about to
Why Sandra Bullock seemingly never ages. My current theory is that
she is a Highlander. There can be only ONE!
Nonsensical questions to ask small children.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I love The Princess Bride.
I blush like super easy. Sometimes cause I'm embarrassed, sometimes
for like no reason, and then on weekends, holidays, and all
When I was three I microwaved a snail. True story.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have a "regular ability to express certain emotions, especially
mirth or delight, by a series of spontaneous, usually unarticulated
sounds often accompanied by corresponding facial and bodily
movements." (Flailing body movements are acceptable).
Uber dooper funtime special bonus points if you have animals.
Unless you have a cage free spider and scorpion collection.
Disclaimer: I don't play games. Unless of course they are board
games (Settlers of Catan is the shit). But seriously, I don't do
that "3 day waiting then call" crap or name drop my female friends
to make you super jelly. If I like you I'll tell you. Straight to
your face! You've been warned...
Who are you looking for?
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