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35 Astoria, NY Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18-48
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 2:59pm
Relationship Type
5' 10" (1.78m)
Body Type
Average build
Atheism and it’s important
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
Has cats
English (Fluently), German (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Moved to Queens, NY from Boston in October 2013.

Most of the time I am pretty happy with myself and who I am.

I'm a computer programming nerd. I'm an atheist. I can't abide intolerance and bigotry. Being white and male and educated, I always try to mind my privilege.

I read slowly but very broadly. I follow a lot of news feeds, from commercial to radical nut jobs, and always try to consider the writers' or their employers' political slant. For fiction I mostly prefer scifi and fantasy.

Fun fact: I don't do cars; I can't pick one model out in a lineup among others, and I've never had a license. When I lived in Boston, getting a car just wasn't a priority. Public transportation serves me well, and I can easily walk for miles if there's somewhere at the end I want to be (like a good beach).

I've been married to kytheavec since 2007, and I'm looking here for friends (casual, serious, confused, BFF, nemesis, etc.), but not life partners.

If you are not looking for sex partners, then we won't be talking about you and me having sex. I don't play games that hurt platonic relationships.

If you are a man or not-female person looking for sex partners: I might be interested. Let's get to know each other first. You will have to meet my wife at some point before we get it on -- you will like her. (Also, my wife is not interested in sex with anyone but me at this time.)

Women looking for sex: I'm happy to make friends, but it might be a long time before my wife trusts you enough. If your objective is really just sex, there are lots of easier targets on OKCupid.

Answers to the old "3 adjectives to describe me" question OKCupid got rid of: I am happy, considerate, and froody.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm a programmer in an a big company building IT stuff, keeping it running, and putting out software fires. What's it like? Very much like Dilbert -- incompetent management paralyses the department's ability to exhibit any kind of rational thought or efficiency. One must derive pleasure and satisfaction from solving small-scale problems, and avoid getting emotionally involved in the big stuff.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I tend to be quiet in social gatherings where I don't know many people. I sometimes have too much unruly wavy/curly hair on my head.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
- a phone
- a computer
- my backpack
- my family
- the manual
- a towel
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
- putting together or writing fresh software for portable, distributed personal information storage, with maximum privacy (not trusting Google, Facebook, or even a small hosting provider)
- information security and privacy
- USA's current fascist government and what to do about it
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hanging out at home or out at a show, usually with my wife.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
One time long long ago in grade school I got really mad because my friend told a secret of mine to a bunch of people in my class. It's not a big deal now, but it sure was then! I was enraged; I got physically violent. I didn't get in any trouble, but I felt really bad about it afterwards, and I learned my lesson that day: whatever the infraction against you -- it probably doesn't matter that much; be cool. And in general, don't fly off the handle.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Contact me if you're looking for friends and think I'm interesting.

Contact me if anything like these activities appeal to you:
- Playing Scrabble in a cafe
- Casual road biking
- Going naked at a clothing optional beach
- Hanging out nude anywhere that's not going to get you in trouble
- IM chatter about technology and tech news
- Classical music concerts
- Buddying up on your open source software project or mine
- Something else that you guess I would like.

Let me know if you can spot the movie I threw into my favorites section just for fun that I'd never actually watch.

It's too bad this isn't true for everyone, but ... I won't be freaked out if you are transgender, genderqueer, disabled, have a crippling disease, or have some other attribute that scares people. Please message me if you think we might have common interests. I'm more interested in what we have in common than what we don't.

My "details" box says I'm "very serious" about being atheist. But I'm not too judgy about it. All religious orientations welcome, even very serious Christians and Muslims, as long as you are also not judgy.

I'm probably not interested if:
- Your profile is empty
- You have answered no sorting questions and thus we have a 0% match

Do say more than "hi." That is neither a question nor a conversation starter.