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33 Worth, IL Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My Details

Last Online
Jan 26
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Catholicism, but not too serious about it
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Working on university
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Has dogs
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
What's up? Welcome to my little corner of the interweb. Wondering what you just got yourself into? I like rocking and occasional partying. I'll admit, I do enjoy a good night in playing some Xbox or watching a movie, but I do like to get out of the house regularly. And this damn thing seems to want me to go on and on and on about myself. What do I look like, some rambling old man? Why, in my day, these things accepted like 100 words, and that was all you needed! And you could get a subscription for a month, two rides on the trolley, a moon pie and STILL get change back for a nickel! And another thing! Back in 19-Dickety-6(we had to use "Dickety" because the Kaiser stole our word "twenty". I chased him, but had to give up after Dickety-three miles)...

Wow. I'm a rambling old dickety nine

I'm a degenerate, am I? Well you, madam, are a festizzio! See? I can make up words too!

Anyways, I'm a huge Bears and White Sox fan. I watch wayyyyy too much Family Guy. And I quote Super Troopers quite a bit too. So I've got quite the sense of humor. In the words of Mel Brooks, "This thing is friggin' warped! I always get a warped one!" Question is, can you keep up with it? Can you handle me? Can you dig it?

I am crazy, sweet, and fun
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Right now, I'm an EMT for a private ambulance company(saving the doctor's appointment at a time!), along with being an apprentice firefighter in the suburbs. I was active duty in the Navy from 2001-2004, and reserves from 2006-2009 (I took a year off to try that college thing. Turns out you DON'T get credit for how much booze you can drink in an average day). Here's the ad that suckered me into the reserves(along with the BS promise of making me a local area recruiter, which never happened) :

"Daybreak: Jakarta...The men and women of the US Navy proudly fight for your freedom. YOU'RE in Lubbock, Texas, hosing the stains off a monument. You're in the Navy Reserve: America's 17th line of defense between the Mississippi National Guard and the League of Women Voters! After basic training, you only work one weekend a month. And most of that time, you're drunk off your ass!"

If you can tell where that's from, that just might be the start of a beautiful friendship(and possibly more!)
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Computers, sometimes cooking, comedy(pointing out the BS in this world humorously) And from what some people say, I tend to be good at that last one. So I've got that going for me. Which is nice.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My really blue eyes
That I'm delightfully insane(not "Hannibal Lechter" insane, more like "Murdock from the A-Team" insane. So, like, "funny" insane, not "Oh crap he's gonna eat my face" insane)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
(a) The Zombie Survival Guide, and I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell(b) Lots o' Movies, way too many to name here (c) Rock, rock, and more rock! So that means Disturbed, Slipknot, Metallica, Ted Nugent(The Motor City Madman!!), and yes, Weird Al Yankovic. Yeah, I like Weird Al. Big deal, wanna fight about it? (d)White Castles, spaghetti, pizza, steak, cheese and sushi.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Honestly, there really aren't 6 things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Stuff, what the hell is going on in my life, and the really nagging questions like "If the Incredible Hulk gets seasick, what color does he turn?" and "Why do they have locks on the door at 7-11 if they're open 24 hours?". You know, the important things in life!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Usually working till about 9 or 10. Then it's usually home to chill. Or I'm out and involved in some shenanigans(and no, you can't pistol-whip me for saying 'shenanigans'). I know, hard to believe I have a social life. But I do!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Here's one for ya: I actually auditioned to be on Fox's "More To Love". True story! But, unfortunately, they wanted "Mary Ann from 'Gilligan's Island' " ugly, not "Cornelius from 'Planet of the Apes' " ugly. "TV" ugly, not "Ugly" ugly.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You seem to find me interesting and you'd like to get to know me better. Or you really, really want to. Either way works

And of course, message me if you're looking for a decent guy who's gonna treat you right, make you laugh and feel special all the time!

I'm looking for a genuine relationship. I'm tired of going on first dates and finding out that sorry, but my princess is in another castle(and if you get that, you're just as big a nerd as me, and we should talk!)

And honestly, kids are kind of a dealbreaker with me. Dated a couple single moms, and it didn't work out very well :(

And please, if you don't feel that we're a match after we meet, don't play the "ignore me" game. Come right out and tell me. And be honest. Seriously.

And for those of you who don't know where Worth is, it's a southwestern sub of Chicago. I'm sorry, Northsiders, but I'm looking for someone I don't need to take a train to see. I'm looking for someone in the suburbs or on the south side of the city.