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26 Martinsburg, WV Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 25–33
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Aug 11
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Judaism, but not too serious about it
Sagittarius, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from law school
Politics / Government
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), Yiddish (Okay), Spanish (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I've seen things that you wouldn't believe. Dinosaurs nuzzling their young in pastures where strip malls should be. Like... eggs on a hooker's stomach. All these moments. Lost in time. Time.... to die.

Hi there! Some random facts about me in no particular order:

Someday I hope to own a small farm. But really, I just want a house goat.

I am a licensed attorney.

I own a cabin in the woods. It is my secret sanctuary.

I'm a classic introvert with a very strong personality. My friends describe me to their friends as someone "you either love or hate immediately" when preparing them to meet me.

I love living in a rural area. I lived in Baltimore City for several years and while I liked that, as well, I prefer quiet roads, no traffic, lots of land, and pretty scenery. And not getting shot.

I'm a realist.

I'm an ex party-kid, and sometimes that oozes back into my reality. Take from that what you will.

I love hiking and being outdoors. I love target shooting.

I love Star Trek. K'plah.

There's little I appreciate more than a well-cooked meal.

I asked my friends to describe me and this is what they listed: Direct, honest, clever, creative, animal lover, good humor.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Enjoying it as much as possible.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
anything I set my mind to. *glitter cannon*
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My charming charisma and radiant personality.

My frequent mention of cats.

That I have the spirit of a hustler.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I haven't been on here in two years, and now literally nothing I wrote is still accurate and I'm too lazy to update it. I like my bed. It's my favorite. Also, cats... comics... spending money on toys. And other things that I'll probably never fill out because fuck it.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Close friends
Target tanktops
The internet
Comfy blankets
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
whywolves, creatures possessed by the spirit of inquiry and bloodlust.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At home sleeping, surfing the web, watching movies.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
This is tough. I don't have many private things I can even think of. I'm an open book.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You live on a farm with tons of animals.

You want to do a ton of outdoor stuff this summer!

I am looking for friends first, relationships later. I am not opposed to a long-term relationship, at all, but my priority is making new friends.

Things that are important qualities: 
1) Honesty, brutal, unrelenting, can't-shut-up honesty. 
2) Loyalty 
3) Someone who knows how to give space. I'm not a cuddler, I'm not into romantic gestures or a bunch of girly bs. I don't need all the fluff and frills. But I do love me some stuffed animals.
4) Someone with an education.
5) Someone who loves animals and also wants a mini-zoo. :) 
6) Someone who can take a joke, even at their own expense. 

And may those inspiring words from the classic “Juicy” by the late great Biggie Smalls be heard by all…“Fuck all you hoes”. That is all.