Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Most guys will make it a point to tell you how awesome they are. I
won't. In fact I'll tell you that you probably shouldn't waste your
time reading any further than this, because I'm the guy no one
picked for their team back in school. Yeah, you heard me. Not even
the LAST guy picked. How sad is that?
If you're still reading at this point... what the heck is wrong
with you?! I wouldn't read this crap this far myself!
But if you are still reading this then you probably have a great
sense of humor, or you have a fetish for mindnumbingly boring guys
with apparent self esteem issues (not really the case but you'll
see what I mean if we end up chatting). If you have either of
these, then congratulations! You just hit the jackpot, baby.
Now, about me:
Simple guy, not afraid to poke fun at self (but would rather poke
fun at everyone else). Would describe self as introspective but
societal definitions may include "introverted", "socially awkward",
and "most likely to end up a serial killer".
(Last point quite possibly an inappropriate joke, thus proving the
definition of "socially awkward".)
Hobbies include writing, reading, and being unattractively dull.
Only known personality quirk aside from penchant for self
deprecating humour and low self esteem include honesty, which may
sometimes be misinterpreted as sarcasm.
A cynic to the bitter end, but looking for that special someone to
prove me wrong and make me feel terribly miserable about being
wrong where life and love are concerned, because misery loves
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
...being terribly not serious.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
How incredibly frowny I am. And unattractive. Like the poor man's
Zach Galifianakis. And I mean hobo poor.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
TV: Burn Notice, CSI, Sherlock, The Mentalist... basically any
intellectual crime drama and I'll probably like it. Oh, and stand
up comedy. And Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson.
Movies: Horror, action flicks. All time favorites? Probably The
Dark Knight, followed by The Avengers, and then probably a tie
between The Dark Knight Rises and Iron Man. Yes, I'm a comic
Music: Alternative rock, and maybe some mainstream. Nirvana, The
Cure, RHCP, Shaman's Harvest, Alter Bridge, Pennywise, etc.
Anything that isn't Kpop, Jpop, or Justin Bieber, I'll probably
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
#1: Air. Specifically oxygen. Duh. Stupid question.
#2: Water. Another duh.
#3: Food. See above.
#4: Humor. Because life without a sense of humor to get you
laughing is a life I'd rather forfeit.
#5: Technology. I'm a technophile. Can't do without my tech. Unless
you distract me with #6.
#6: Sex. Not gonna lie. I'm a guy. It's ingrained. Preprogrammed. I
can't fight millennia of genetic encoding. Asking a guy to not
include "sex" in any Top (number) list is like asking a typical
woman if she doesn't love shoes.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How terribly mundane everything is.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Bored. Mind-numbingly bored.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
How people really should be glad of the fact that I'm never
motivated enough to act on my less than desirable (read: psychotic)
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...you're tired of hot, beach-bod guys looking like they stepped
out of a fragrance ad. If you're looking for absolute mediocrity,
I'm your guy. Maybe.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.