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RandolphJay

25 M Cypress, CA

My Details

Last Online
Today – 3:03am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Hispanic / Latin
Height
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Gemini
Education
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Has dogs and dislikes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
DISCLAIMER: I am extremely blunt and honest with many things that come out of my brain box, so if you aren't use to it I apologize.

-Anyone that starts off their profile with, "I'm super sarcastic and funny!" is a fucking liar. Whoever tells these people that they are funny must have a sense of humor akin to that of a 40 year old mormon cat lady.

-I'm just here for friends, if something comes out of it then so be it.
-Whiskey is in my veins
-Often I feel like punting a small child when people don't know the difference between "your" and "you're" LEARN ENGLISH!
-Left handed
-The whitest "Mexican" you'll ever know
-People watching is a pass-time of mine.
-"I'm a baller on a budget"-Daniel Tosh
-I don't like raves, ravers or techno *it's not music to me*
-Pizza will seriously be the death of me, they need a sort of pizzaholics anonymous.
-Painting when I'm bored makes me happy
-I have a fascination with lawn gnomes.
-Choco tacos=Jesus+1
-Taking a random adventure to no where at all is always a good idea to me.
-I love nerds
-Feet are fucking disgusting, if you're into feet for some terrible reason don't bother talking to me, YOU ARE A MONSTER AND DESERVE TO BE BADLY BURNED!
-If you play any sort of instrument I'd be more than down to have a lil jam session. I'll bring the pizza and whiskey.
What I’m doing with my life
Giving guitar lessons like a thug.

Someone should show me new hiking trails...just saying.
I’m really good at
Stealing candy from small children and invading the minds of my foes with one hand tied behind my back
The first things people usually notice about me
Well although I am well aware that I am not very tall for a guy people still feel the need to remind me of how short I am. *sighs* As if I've lived for 24 years of my life and not realized never realized this fact.

But then again I don't read minds and would rather not ask.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: The perks of being a wallflower, Anything Poe related, Slaughter house V, The Giver, 1984, Storm of the century and whatever else strikes my interest

Movies: Drop Dead Fred is by far the beees knees in my opinion that and Labyrinth, Back to the Future 1/2/3, Dark Crystal, American History X, Any sort of Alien or Predator movie, Hard Candy, Amelie, Spun, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Star Wars, Eternal Sunshine, Garden State and The Science of Sleep.

Music is a completely different story as well, I like mostly everything but country, techno and new hiphop....honestly the whole auto-tuned vocals in every song is getting old.

I also like to keep things fatty with my foods. Pizza, mozzarella sticks, steak...

What's a salad? That leafy green stuff? Is it covered in 5 kinds of cheese and bacon? No thanks then...I'll just take the heart attack on a plate...oh wait, I mean the 4 cheese hamburger with extra bacon, can I get that all deep fried?
The six things I could never do without
GOD, Music, pizza, water, traveling, friends, a good whiskey, dumb people and counting past 6

*The god part is a joke, I'm poking fun at the people who put that there*
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Traveling around the world in a winnebago, whether or not I am going to be on tv tomorrow, if I am on tv tomorrow would my grandmother be watching it, why is she watching the tv when she should be making tasty food for 36 grand kids, how many children can fit inside a telephone booth, do animals have souls, if so do they have their own separate heaven and hell, what kind of a dog would Satan or God be, if there is a parallel dimension where I am a tall black man, why do aliens come 47389472389278920 light years just to anal probe us......and I can keep on all day about the ideas and thoughts in my brain haha
On a typical Friday night I am
Normally inviting some friends over for drinks and a bonfire in my backyard while I am cooking tasty delights that only the likes of myself can come up with.

But I could also be painting or recording...stop giving me stupid subjects to make people base their opinion on me from what I say! Damn websites.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
The holocaust is what Chuck Norris did for a klondike bar...true story.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You actually read or at the very least skimmed through my profile, think that pizza, whiskey and History channel sounds like a great night or enjoy hikes as much as I do and would like to go on an adventure.

p.s. If you type "LyK3 d!$", don't bother with your 9th grade education I like them somewhat nerdy.