Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


41 San Francisco, CA Man


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24–38
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Online now!
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Agnosticism, and somewhat serious about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Working on Ph.D program
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Please read my entire profile to ensure we are looking for the same thing.

I am a tall, fit, attractive, highly successful male with advanced degrees who recently got out of a relationship - I have a "normal" profile that I'm happy to share and would merge the two, but my jobs preclude that. However, the below qualities are important so I've decided to throw them out there at the beginning as opposed to going on 3 dates with you before discovering that you're a "lights out missionary style" only type and disappointing us both; if I wanted that, I would have stayed in the Midwest!

I recently ended a relationship and am still processing that information. Therefore I am not trying to jump into anything serious, though I open to it. But I so have a high sex drive and a need to play with power dynamics with a sane, safe woman who communicates well and enjoys being treated like a princess in public and my toy in private. I am kind and thoughtful and will make you feel utterly safe at all times while controlling you sexually. All limits and boundaries will always be adhered to and I will treat you very, very well while, at least at times,
Dominating you sexually.

Also, the below does NOT preclude: Snuggling, buying you flowers, listening to you when you need to talk, opening the door for you, making love to you, gentle kisses on the forehead, doing things for you just because, or picking you up from the airport. I will be thrilled to do all these things and more. That being said.......

Sexually Dominant, kinky, highly educated male seeking an independent, strong, witty, goals-oriented woman. I am 6'2", fit, have a graduate degree, and am working on a PhD. I am seeking a kinky, sexually submissive woman for an otherwise egalitarian relationship. Please note: The person I'm with does not ALWAYS have to be sexually submissive - variety is good. However, being sexually Dominant is part of my personality and I do need outlet for that at least part of the time.

I work in healthcare and academia so comfort and safety are a TOP priority for me. I am not looking for someone that wants to truly be hurt or degraded (Though someone that enjoys playing with pain/pleasure dynamics is MOST welcome). I am not interested in re-creating any prior trauma. Rather, I am looking for a great relationship with someone that happens to be trustworthy, yet kinky and insatiable. I enjoy verbal domination, restraints, spanking, role-play/dress up, giving sexy assignments, and most other forms of kink. Watching/hearing/feeling my partner have an orgasm (and another, and another....) is one of my favorite things and you will be well rewarded for the "work" I make you do.....

Face pic and answers to any questions available upon request. As well, please WRITE SOMETHING when you approach me. This dynamic is sensitive and requires very good communication. If you're shy or hesitant, that's fine - just say so! I will guide you in assessing what you're looking for and will be very gentle in getting to know you. However, multiple one line responses indicate to me that you are ambivalent or are unable to communicate your needs and wants to me - which is paramount as I will only enjoy this if I'm also making you feel very, very good.

Also, please note that I am typically not the Dominant type that will totally overpower you from the first sentence or the first meeting. Don't get me wrong - once trust is established, I can be VERY aggressive, am very strict (when we're in this mode, NOT outside of it), and will thoroughly and completely dominate you when we're engaged in this style of play. However, I have to know that you will keep yourself safe with good limits and boundaries for this to start to blossom. I can only participate in this type of behavior when I know that you are deriving great pleasure from this. As well, I also like to mix some gentleness in with things. Nothing enhances the sting of an "almost too much" slap to the ass like this sensation being interspersed with soft, probing fingers and words of encouragement whispered in your ear.....

I have a very active, albeit dark sense of humor and will laugh at anything - including myself. I enjoy finding humor in human behavior and the sociological implications of the things around us. Oh, and people falling down is always funny too!

ALL limits and boundaries will be respected at ALL times. There is no negotiation on this. Ever. I will CAREFULLY assess what your limits are and gently but firmly guide you into the gray areas that we want to explore. This is for your safety AND mine. I refuse to contribute to anyone's trauma or low self-worth. How will I do this? I will ask. A lot. I will check in with you. A lot. Once trust is established, this will diminish, though you ALWAYS have the option of stopping anything at anytime. However, if you don't have the patience or attention-span to endure this at the beginning, I will annoy the hell out of you. I assure you, if we click, that we'll get to the point where you walk in the door, and I grab you by the hair and take you mercilessly, but that will not be until I know that it's safe for you to engage in this behavior.

Please excuse the douchebag/ wife-beater photo, it's the only somewhat discreet pic I have right now. I normally don't walk around in a wife-beater....promise!

As for "normal" activities, I'm a voracious reader, travel often, go out dancing often, engage in intellectual (or silly) conversation, watch smart, engaging, and/or funny movies/shows, and work hard to bring good quality health care to under served individuals and train the next generation of health care providers to do the same. I feel strongly about social services and if you don't understand why someone would want to work with homeless, bat-shit insane people (that's a medical term - look it up), even if YOU wouldn't want to, we probably won't get along. If I love taking care of some homeless dude that wants to stab me in the eyeball, think of how well I'll take care of YOU!

Very open to someone who has experience with this or, if you're merely curious, introducing you slowly and taking very good care of you. I enjoy spoiling a sub, especially if younger, and will take you out for the best of everything, buy you clothes you will wear for me, etc.

Happy to answer any questions and will always be honest and direct.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I work in Health-Care (think prescriber) and Academia (think extra credit ;). I'm also the host of a nationally syndicated radio talk show.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Communicating and ensuring that my partner feels well taken care of. I'm also very good at tying you to my bookcase and thoroughly working you over......
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Choose the MOST correct answer from the following:

A. The missing limb.
B. The faint sound of a calliope that follows me everywhere.
C. The light I had installed in my forehead that flashes when I'm joking due to my dry sense of humor and deadpan delivery.(Remember, the longest answer is usually the correct one).
D. None of the above.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Dark comedies, documentaries, well-written dramatic series.

Sci-fi, fantasy, any media exploring existential issues.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Learning/self-actualization
2. Kinky sex with a trusted partner
3. Dancing
4. Sleep
5. Exercise
6. Lists
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to find a girlfriend/partner that is smart, warm, caring, communicative, interesting, funny, goals-oriented - and a complete and utter kinkster.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Sitting back, sipping good bourbon, watching you tied to my coffee table and listening to you beg for something you're not going to get just....quite....yet.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have another profile on OKC that is my "normal" profile. Ideally, I would merge the 2, but my jobs preclude that possibility. Maybe you have seen it?

If you're interested in the dynamic I describe here, I will share it with you. Put the 2 together and voila! This is me.....
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are looking for a sane, hot Dom who will spoil and use you safely and with dignity or you are curious about this dynamic and want to explore in a safe way with an experienced, caring man