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24 New York, NY Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–49
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Jan 23
6′ 1″ (1.86m)
Body Type
Catholicism, and laughing about it
Gemini, and it’s fun to think about
Art / Music / Writing
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
First of all, I love writing... a lot. So be prepared for a long read to skim through because this whole profile may only basically say the same two or three things but I gladly took the time to say it in 2,000 words or more. Can't help myself. Even now. And now. So forget it, don't even read it, just message me because, why not? Even if you don't even like me. Maybe something will click and through our mutual hatred we'll both figure out the cure for world hunger. It's possible.

Oh.. and no.. I don't think I'm "The Man" as I've been accused of thinking I am because of how I write. ..Well, I mean... I do, but I don't try to sound like I think I do. Dammit, I think I messed that up.


I'm a young stand-up comic, writer and doorman because those two pay so well. Absolutely every single second of the day there's a part of my mind that is making a joke about every moment in time that's happening. When something does happen and I don't actually make a joke out loud its because I made a conscious decision not to.. Not because I didn't want to offend people but, because no one would last around me for more than five minutes. But I'm exaggerating of course and am far from a guy who can't be serious.

I'm NOT a hipster... not that there's anything wrong with that.

I have two younger sisters (18, 13) who are two of my favorite people in the world but ya know, we're not, like, weirdo close. I also have a baby nephew that I would push both my sisters in front of a train for. He's awesome. But why are we discussing all this now? Moving on.

I love writing. I can't stop. I'm hesitant to even start right now... because I'm just not going to stop. Oh god it's starting...

I'm so goddamn lovable people really hate me for it.

I stupidly went many years suppressing my love for acting and comedy and the works after my uncle sat me down and convinced me to put it off until later. He meant well. Only took five years for me to finally snap and realize I was wasting my life away and I am literally just a matter of weeks into trying to make up lost time. So I've barely got the door open let alone put my foot through it. Im doing it more or less on my own so its all still a learning process and havent even started down the acting road just yet.

I hate with a passion editing purely for grammar and small spelling mistakes. Then when I do that I end up adding more content which his mistakes and have to come back later and edit it again... and the cycle begins anew.

I'm highly intelligent, really funny, unbelievable in bed and ridiculously modest. Honestly, I'm pretty sure that my lack of ego is what makes me better than everybody else.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
-Filling out online dating profiles.
-Having an intelligent and engaging conversation, I only recently figured out this is a lost art.
-Killing people and getting away with.
-Time Travel
-Taunting the police about all those people I killed in the future.
-Im really very good with many to all the words.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The next time I meet someone I'll very intently watch their eyes and take notes, then I'll let you know.

But I'm somewhat tall for most people at 6'1".

Girls tend to fall in love with me fairly quickly... as long as I'm still in the room. Once I leave they think better of it,.. gotta work on that. Thinking about starting my own cult, just have to figure out the more boring legal aspects of how to set that up first.

Oh and also I have dimples and just an incredibly adorable smile. Growing up I had a pretty intense gap between my front teeth, and I'm not a suave black guy so I had harder to get away with it. It's barely worth mentioning but its pretty much the one physical thing that affected my self-confidence when I was a kid so to this day, as you can see, it doesnt feel natural to me to smile with teeth in pictures.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Nothing I enjoyed before Breaking Bad matters anymore but still as far as TV Shows I'm still in with Game of Thrones, Louie, and Walking Dead(kinda). Have to mention Arrested Development, The Wire, Friends, Seinfeld, LOST was my religion for a few years nd a bunch of other older off the air shows.

When it comes to books I read all the Harry Potters when I was the same age he was. Perks of Being a Wallflower was my favorite book for a long time. I'm reading Game of Thrones. Read many Harlan Coben mystery novels. I still remember The Alchemist. Have a Nice Day the autobiography of Mick Foley was incredible as well. Now most of these books are really long but still even though I want to read Stephen King books I'm still just completely intimated by them.  

Also I just picked up "If Did It (Here's How It Would Have Happened)." by OJ Simpson and I have to say OJ is one of the most incredibly compelling fiction authors of all time. It's amazing. You'd think he actually brutally murdered those people.

As far asmusic I enjoy absolutely everything. People hear that and think that it's non-committal bullshit or something... but no.. seriously, let's shuffle my iPod and I'll prove it. I have no specific genre of music that I listen to when I'm sad or anything like that either. Music, in any style,has the power to move me and further whatever emotion I'm relishing in at the time. More than anything though, weirdly, what holds the most space on my iPod are lyricless scores to movies, television, etc.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Words
2. Mutually satisfying, incredible sex
3. Family and friends blah blah blah
4. Some type of outlet for my thoughts
5. The freedom to say and believe anything I want
6. Oxygen... Although I'm not 100% convinced on that one.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Many many things. My mind is always working. I can never truly turn it off I love figuring things out, small things, big things, people, everything. Lets see what comes to mind right now.

Sex. Okay, I feel like we've developed enough of relationship by now that I can admit this to you. Now, I'm not obsexsed with sex in the least, So if you're not a girl that wants to be crazy open about this, by all means I totally respect that and just skip this part or something. Hell, a part of me wants to lie because it's just so expected to read that, but come on.. who am I kidding? Why lie? Believe it or not, sex is easily my mostest favoritest thing in the whole wide world. I take great personal pride in hopefully being considered good in bed by my partner and if they don't eventually tell me I'm the best they've ever had then I'm doing something wrong. I can't wrap my mind around some other guys that are just in it for themselves. Even the dummies that dont realize they suck, or think that doing the Alphabet with their tongue on a girl translates to them knowing what the hell they're doing, I just cant relate to that and only recently found out thats how the majority of the guys I know think. I don't even begin to think about my own pleasure until I know, visibly KNOW, my partner has been satisfied... as many times as humanly possible ;) If every sexual act doesn't end with both people, breathing heavy and staring at the ceiling/sky I'm not too sure we did it right. Can you see why I should have put this at number one? But alright, alright moving on.

The other thing, because this bio is only saying the same thing over and over, is comedy and how to make a situation funny and enjoyable.. Even if only just for me. Stand up comedy is my addiction, both to watch and do myself. I can talk about it for hours, but I'm running out of steam here.

Stories. Whenever something happens I tend to imagine what would have made that situation much better when the story is eventually told.

And right up there with these things would just be thinking about how the world works when truly broken down. I like to analyze everything and understand what it means in the bigger picture. I like hearing about history and figuring out how it relates to today, and how much better we think we are than a culture of a couple hundred years ago but how little we've actually changed. I like figuring out what is fully acceptable today that will be condemned in the future... ya know.... stupid shit like that.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
This is NYC, brother. There is no Friday night.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I play the wordless scores and themes of movies and TV on my ipod and then pretend it's the soundtrack to the works around me... I then adjust my actions accordingly.

I've never been off the East Coast but long to see the world.

You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
-You were born with one of those vagina things.
-You have a good sense of humor.
-You think I'm cute or funny or just generally like me but you don't usually feel comfortable being the one who messages first. Come on now, what year is it? Don't wait for me. I'll still open the door for you.. Just do it,... just say hi, hell just say "...", treat it like a little extra eye contact or a smile from across the bar. I'll take it from there.
-You think we might fall deeply, madly in love with each other and put this site behind us.
-You want to be friends.
-You want to be more than friends.
-You want to have incredible, life changing, unbelievable sex... because if you do I have a friend that's really good at that, I'll give you his number.
-You want to talk about anything at all.
-You want to have a conversation with someone about something.
-You need advice.
-You wanna shoot the shit on TV, movies, or a few mainstream video games... (or know who Daniel Bryan is)
-You're me from the future and you're trying to stop me from doing that thing I'm about to do that'll ruin everything.
-You're the girl who sat next to me in Italian class in the 6th grade and was really cute and totally diggin' me but I was still too new and scared to go for it and settled for a few months of intense, obvious tension followed by me totallyblowing it.
-Oh and if you're totally against everything I said and don't like me one bit. Let me know. Itll be fun completely changing your mind without you even realizing that you fell for it. Always need a little cult leader practice.

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