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34 Ontario, CA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 26–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 10:27pm
Straight, Demisexual
Hispanic / Latin, White
Relationship Type
Mostly monogamous
5' 6" (1.68m)
Body Type
Working on Two-year college
Might want kids
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
The side bar says that I'm interested in women, but it should really be generally interested in DFAB people who fall somewhere between women and non binary. I am not usually going to develop attraction towards hyper feminine people or hyper masculine people. Gender non conforming, sort of middle of the road works best for me. However, it is not a hard and fast rule.

The TL:DR version is: I am: Liberal, artistic, a writer, spiritual, an activist, creative, lgbtqqia friendly, and very emotionally supportive of the people I care about.

Okay, the long version:

On LGBT Issues:

We can't be friends if don't support equal rights for everybody. And not just marriage, but everything. Did you know gay men can't donate blood because of bullshit ass archaic stereotypes? Yeah. There are other issues, too. I'm extremely passionate about lgbt issues. It's a strong religious view, but it's also personal. I have many friends and family members who are in the lgbt community. I love them as individuals and would want them to be treated like everybody else. Even if I knew zero lgbt people, I'd still want to support their rights on principle, but knowing people makes it personal.

On Religion and "god":

Talking about religion is difficult. I'm an atheist who teaches Sunday school. Wait, what? Yeah. You read that right. I love my church, but I don't believe in any kind of god or goddess. I'm a Unitarian Universalist which is a really cool religion. We're progressive and believe in social justice activism, not dogma or creeds.

I don't believe in God, heaven, or hell.

I teach Sunday School to high school kids, and I teach various age groups about healthy human sexuality and relationship practices aka sex ed.

On School and Learning:

Learning is probably my favorite activity. A good partner would be someone who challenges me to consider new perspectives and who likes to keep me on my toes, because challenging ourselves is the only way we grow and I want us (you and me?) to grow into our best possible selves.

On Alcohol and Drugs:

I don't really drink. I will sometimes, but it's rare. The good news is that if you drink, I'll be your designated driver.

I don't "use drugs" but I'm not against people who smoke weed or use psychedelics. A friend of mine was addicted to meth until he remembered how much he liked smoking weed. I think weed saved his life and am forever indebted to it for his sake.

Occasionally (like once or twice a year), I'll drink cough syrup and think in a unique way. It's fun and I learn something about myself each time, but it's gross tasting. I can't really explain it. It's a different type of thinking that you can't really get with out help, I've found.

What I'm Looking For:

This is very important. I'm looking for a few different things. Primarily friends. I don't have many friends. The people at school and church are either too old or too young to be genuine friends. I tend to make friends with women. I can separate friendship and romantic desire pretty easily.

I'm also interested in dating. It's been a long time since I've dated. I don't really like the dating process because I'm not great at it. The thing is, I'm really good at being in a long term relationship.

If I meet a woman I like, I want to eventually join her team. I want to care about her goals and dreams, I want to share in her victories and defeats, I want to be someone she relies on. And I want her to join my team. I want her to care about my goals and dreams, I want her to share in my victories and defeats, I want her to be someone I can rely on.

I want our two teams to start off distinct and then grow to where I can't tell whose dreams are whose.

That sounds really needy. It's not vital but it's ideal. I like to maintain separate interests and identities, but I like us to work towards our shared goals and dreams. It really means a lot to me to help people pursue things important to them.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I have a wandering mind and tend to get curious about random things. I once ruined a perfectly good date by spending way too much time talking about what I'd been reading up on that day. It was the mating habits of slugs. I am sure she thought I was just trying to talk about sex to "plant the idea" or something but it was really just: holy crap slug sex is interesting. I plan to incorporate it into a story at some point, but I'm not sure how or when.

I used to see myself as a writer and now this block seems out of date so I had to cut that bit out. I'm an artist. I specialize in mixed media and video. If you check out my pinterest, you can see various pieces of video and art that I've done recently. Video is sort of my focus, or rather it can be from time to time.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Thinking on my feet. This has been universally true. I enjoy public speaking, especially if I'm only partially prepared. This is also how I work on art. I like feeling the energy of figuring things out and working on problems. It's fun. I suppose if I were an actor, I would do improvisational acting. I get bored repeating myself.

I'm also really good at being supportive because I never really had a support network when I was growing up. I like to be that support network for other people. It's another thing I just love to do. I love to see people pursue their dreams and if I can help them get there, I want to.

And although there is a "TV Shows" thing just a few paragraphs down, I want to talk about one of my favorite shows. It's called Made and sometimes it sucks really bad but sometimes you get episodes like this one which reaffirms my belief that sometimes people can be wonderful. Both Natalie and her coach are people I'd love to kick it with. If you can watch this episode and not see the magic behind this show, do not message me. This is what I want to do with my life. Help and inspire.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
that I'm easy going, mellow, and adaptable.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Okay so my tastes are extremely varied. I like stuff that surprises me. That's the requirement. It has to catch me off guard. Making me feel something or teaching me something is a close second to surprising me.


OH MAN. When I last updated my profile, I was in love with my kindle. I think ereaders are great for many reasons. But I've found I prefer to buy physical books and I prefer to read them, too. I don't know why. The content is more important than the form but for some reason, I've been reading and buying physical books more than e books.

My favorite books tend to be speculative fiction, like American Gods by Neil Gaiman, or Parable Of the Sower by Octavia E. Butler.

Sometimes I like stuff that is just plain weird, like Cruddy by Lynda Barry. Other writers I really like are: Sam Kieth, Mark Z. Danielewski, Joe Bruce, Tananarive Due, and Nalo Hopkinson.

It's also important to mention that I love good comic books. These tend to not have super heroes. Some of my favorites include: persepolis, maus, sandman, the maxx, watchmen and zero girl.


Good news, I've finally got NETFLIX and oh my goodness wow.

Saved!, Cloud Atlas, Beetlejuice, Bulworth, most Kevin Smith films, American Beauty, The Usual Suspects, Apocalypse Now, Full Metal Jacket, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Crash.


Big Bang Theory is my favorite sit com but I also enjoy How I Met Your Mother. That's about it as far as sitcoms go. Wyland's art studio on kcet is fun, too, but I often forget that it is on. I really love that netflix shows are throwing out the whole "everybody has to be straight and white" shit that network TV has. I loved Daredevil, Sense8, and Orange is the New Black.


Oh, god. Ok. Listen. Music is almost as difficult for me to talk about as religion because I am more varied than other people. I don't think this makes me better than other people. This is just where I am, musically. I like to be surprised so my tastes jump around.

The vast majority of what I like has a lot of bass. And vocals. I almost never listen to instrumental music.

I don't think my taste is all that refined. I don't listen to music for "talent". A lot of people get really upset when I explain that sometimes it's fun to like music that doesn't care if the artist is all that good.

I loathe pandora. It can never understand my musical tastes because I don't like specific things.

Lately, I mostly listen to Tricky (he used to be in Massive Attack), but also like the Sun City Girls, Nirvana, Tech N9ne, Delta Rae, Rage Against the Machine (sometimes, they get repetitious though), Mindless Self Indulgence, System of a Down, Alanis, Billie Holiday, Elevator Fight, Amanda Palmer, Bikini Kill, Ani Defranco, Portishead, MIA, EMA, Santigold, Suicidal Tendencies, George Jones, Thievery Corporation, and random bands I find online. As you can see, it's mostly stuff that falls in "alternative" genres rather than "pop" genres. I do not care for most forms of "pop". This includes indie pop, dream pop, or pop punk. It's not that pop is inherently wrong or bad, I just usually can't relate or connect with it.


I've never been as big of a gamer as my friends but I love me some metal gear solid games. I like that they have an anti-war message, mock people who play violent video games, give you extra points if you win without killing anybody (including the bosses) and are more like a movie than a game. I liked Heavy Rain but it wasn't life changing. The Last of Us had some cool moments but I had political problems with it. When my brother bought a PS4, he gave me his PS3 so I'm trying to get into other games. I'd appreciate recommendations.

As for non video games, I like Apples to Apples and Gloom. I don't play that many games though.


My favorite art is surreal and my favorite medium is mixed, the best artist at this kind of style that I've seen is Dave Mckean. I'm not very good at making it but if you are, show me your work! I will appreciate it. I also really like Sam Kieth. I think my work is probably most similar to bill viola's.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. creative problem solving
2. Literature
3. Loud, throbbing bass lines
4. the ocean (or any large body of water)
5. spirited debate (seriously, disagree with me on something)
6. expression
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Politics, mythology, comics and stories. I try to take ideas from everyday life, things from the world around me and then blend magic, mythology, spirituality and fantasy into metaphors about the world we live in.

I try to be aware of how my actions effect others but am not always perfect at it. This means I try to be aware of my white male privilege and try to lessen it by considering how my actions effect minorities.

I often wonder why OkCupid thinks 40 miles away is close. In the greater LA area, this is far from close.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Mostly at home. That's really exciting, isn't it? I'm usually either reading or doing laundry or both. I can multitask like that. I don't like bars or clubs unless there is good live music. I'd like to spend Friday's hanging out with you.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have a weird literary crush on Audrey Niffenegger. I love that she is so odd and fun. Her personality and her sense of humor, her style of art and the people she has as friends are all really cool. I finally "read" some of her work! Yay! It was an audiobook version of Her Fearful Symmetry and it good but not life changing or anything.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you like making friends, think we'd be good friends, like to read, are liberal, funny, smart and interesting.