Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
life and its purpose......also random things such as:
-What if for one day, in an entire 24 hour period, everyone
committed a thoughtful, selfless act for another human being?
-Lastly, why there is all this subtle and sometimes not so subtle
pressure in dating. "Online dating" for example, has dehumanized us
in a sense from organic human interaction, taking away the ability
to form our own opinion of someone face to face/eye to eye, and
determining compatibility naturally, has now been replaced by
forming an opinion on information a person CHOOSES to input/divulge
about themselves, thus taking away the element of genuine
chemistry. Yet, here we all are. I get it, its conveinent, but like
most conveinent things, it shouldnt replace what truly matters.
Also, another aspect of dating I find fascinating. This is based
off a conversation I had with a friend a short time ago in which he
expressed concern after a few failed dates. I offered the following
advice (I will be paraphrasing from memory obviously, but recall my
advice rather in detail)......
"Its your approach Mike. You want to "change" your results in
dating, then first you need to change your mindset about it.
Instead of being hopeless, dateless, and stressing about it, take a
moment to consider a few of these points....
....That before meeting someone, instead of worrying whether or not
they'll like you, you could wonder if you'll like them?
....That instead of feeling the need to impress them, you could
wonder if they'll impress you?
....That instead of sitting there silently wondering what to say
next to make them like you, you could sit there silently wondering
what they will say to make you like them?
...That instead of waiting around for a phone call or text, you
could find something else to do while they wait for your
...That instead of worrying if you're tall enough or good looking
enough or skinny enough, you could decide whether she is to
superficial to recognize your great qualities?
...That instead of trying to come up with a perfect date, you could
decide that someone who truly likes you for you doesn't need a
...That instead of looking for a conversation they'll enjoy, you
could discuss something you'll enjoy?
...That instead of feeling insecure about how good you are in bed,
you could wonder how good they are in bed?
...That instead of looking for their approval, you can decide to
...That instead of becoming upset about why they dont want to be
with you, you could decide it means you probably wouldnt want to be
Reading this back to myself, and recalling how I said it to my
friend....it may sound a bit selfish. But, in fact, its called
having strong boundaries and high self esteem and truly the
paradigm in which I view dating now.