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31 Tampa, FL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18-99
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 12:59am
6' 0" (1.83m)
Body Type
Agnosticism but it’s not important
Doesn’t have kids but wants them
Has dogs
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Just a typical online-dating beta male with nothing to offer anyone worth talking to. I have no solid career path, make a decent hourly wage, and drive an old beat up jeep. No chance I have my shit together enough to support a family, but a serious relationship would be GREAT! I lost my sex drive a while ago, and am way too close minded to ever lose any argument or ever agree that I've done anything wrong. If you have tattoos I won't bring you home to mom, but tobacco is ok bc I dip and smoke. I also do weed and sometimes eat magic mushrooms, occasionally other drugs too if I've had enough drinks in me. I also don't eat healthy. Mostly Wendy's and fried chicken. Occasionally I'll eat chipotle if I'm feeling like a big spender or want to trick myself into thinking I'm eating healthy. After my glory days in HS I stopped working out all together and started getting a beer belly in college, well vocational school that is. I wear a lot of hats bc I'm balding. I have three dogs. I don't clean or wash dishes but I pay my illegal immigrant neighbor in ramen noodle dinners to clean my tiny studio apartment.

If you made it all the way through that, we should probably run away to Mexico and get married right now. Or Vegas.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working hard/playing hard.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Avoiding writing about myself.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Let me know when you figure that one out.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I don't waste time reading fiction. I do waste time reading okcupid profiles. Fml

All music is good. At least what I listen to is good.

I want to live off seafood. Maybe I'll live on an island one day.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My dog(s), redneck riviera, beer, shotguns, whiskey, girls in daisy dukes
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Interactions between people.


The secrets of the planet and our universe.

Why entertainers make more money than everyone else, and why so many people try to keep up with their lives.

How the concept of currency seems like a complete scam.

If anyone has ever made it this far down on my profile.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Doing something crazy. Or not doing anything at all.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
That 95% of this profile is complete bullshit. The summary section at the top is part of the remaining 5%.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're marriage material. Or a sexual predator. Or both.