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27 Saint Louis, MO Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–42
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
May 10
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body type
Mostly other
Graduated from masters program
Rather not say
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), French (Fluently), Swedish (Okay), Spanish (Okay), Italian (Okay)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Hi! I'm Brandon.

I'm pretty infatuated with people who are into being a decent person. Real big fan of that.
My senior quote was "it's a magical world, ol' buddy. Let's go exploring!"
I've had my style described as a cross between that of a bro and a hipster. I think that's preposterous. I prefer the term "derelicte chic".
Math, French, and Philosophy in undergrad.
Forensic Linguistics in grad school.
Recovering Catholic.

I look ethnically ambiguous!
(Mom's Italian, dad's a 'Merican)

Genetic traits I did not inherit:
Ones that make you yell "Ciao Bella!" from a Vespa
Hatred toward Carthiginians
Tendency to be sacked by Huns and Visigoths

Genetic traits I did inherit:
Swarthy Mediterranean skin tone
Wild hand gesticulation
Corn-fed Midwestern boy (6'4")
I look surprisingly not-that-bad with a euro trash haircut
I totally lied, I would definitely yell "Ciao Bella!" if I had a Vespa.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Being awesome.
Grinning Sheepishly.
Just moved back to St Louis from Brooklyn, I keep a place there and in Raleigh.
Working on a documentary with NC State on American dialectology.
I'm the founder and CEO of an educational philanthropy startup. A lot of after school programs, community outreach, tutoring, and fundraising.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Shuffleboard. Scrabble. Surreptitiousness. Alliteration.
Trivia nights/pub quizzes.
I am an exceptional cook.
I was the Pokemon card Midwest Champion in 2000, bet I'm still pretty good at that.
Navigation. I would be a great first mate. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have a huge, expansive, prodigious, absolutely monstrous.... vocabulary.

I'm also pretty tall, and my mom says I have beautiful eyes.

Big bushy beard.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Battlestar Galactica (My favorite ever), Pride and Prejudice (1810, 2005), Catch-22, Infinite Jest, Kurt Vonnegut, Firefly, Californication seasons 1-3, Cowboy Bebop, all Quentin Tarantino, Forgetting Sarah Marshall (will always lift my spirits), Scrubs, loads of others but these lists are really tedious.

...And the Rolling Stones. Especially the Rolling Stones.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Quantum mechanics and baseball. Not necessarily simultaneously.

What causes the prevalence of the word "taco" in usernames on OKCupid?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I can French braid.

My ring tone is Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkson, it hasn't changed in over 9 years, and will never change. That one's actually not very private, I'm fairly vocal about it.

I won't go home with you on the first date. I'm not even sorry. Not to say I don't wanna mack, but I think this rule has served me well in the past. It is unbecoming of a gentleman to grant access to his nether regions so hastily.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You think the best test for how good a person is, is how they treat those who can't benefit them in any way. If that's the case, I think we'd get along famously.

Your loins tremble in the presence of tall, intermittently bearded, coy, witty, lumberjack-ish men who can whisper sweet nothings in French.

You appreciate that instead of claiming 'jacked' for body type I selected 'average' , even if only because 'top-notch arms, surprisingly firm chest, but hasn't come close to a six-pack since high school where daily participation in sports was encouraged' isn't an option.

You have a lot of free time and you want to drink a bottle or three of red wine and watch either BSG or Scrubs from beginning to end over a couple weeks (Or days. If that's possible). But seriously.

OR if you want to play Scrabble. I fucking love Scrabble.