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32 F Austin, TX

My Details

Last Online
Today – 8:02am
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Has dogs

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My self-summary
I talk a lot and always have something to say but when it comes to writing about myself....I'm a morning person, I'm one of those girls who wakes up like it's her birthday everyday. I'm a bartender in the west village and I absolutely love my job. I really have fun at work and feel lucky to work where I do!
I instagram too much. Yup. Ig: Sassasamantha ...I will mind fuck you with my culinary expertise. Being obsessed with my dog. He's a pit bull. And the most loveliest being on the planet....but may bite a toe or two if you act like a douchebag.
What I’m doing with my life
Enjoying it. To the fullest. Everyday is a new adventure.
I’m really good at
I'm quite the chef, so cooking, with wine, while drinking, said wine. Staying till last call and finding my way to stay later then that. Making moms and dads love me. Sleeping an entire day away and feeling awesome about it. Making "I'm at the gym" playlists that would make most spotify subscribers think I'm a 16 year old boy. And truthfully seeing the beauty in all truths.
The first things people usually notice about me
My smile, it's always on my face....well that and there's the boobs. Thanks Mother Nature for making me every Pamela Anderson Anna Nicole Smith and Marilyn Monroe (my favorite) reference that ever was. .. "You look just like..."
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Holly Golightly, The Kills, Patsy Cline, Ottis Redding, The Smiths (and all things Morrissey related) The Libertines, The Velvet Underground, Tegan and Sara, The Decemberists, Iron and Wine, Elvis Presley, Belle & Sebastian, City and Colour, Nancy Sinatra, Chuck Ragan, Shout Out Louds, Reverend Horton Heat, The Beach Boys, The Detroit Cobras, Eagles of Death Metal, The Thermals, Dolly Parton, Cake, Goldfrapp, The Brian Jonestown Massacre, The Specials, Blondie, The Cure, T. Rex, The Sounds, The Ravonettes.... If I can booty shake, I'll take it.

New Girl, American Horror Story, Orange is The New Black, any food network show, Downtown Abby, Dexter, Law and Order
The six things I could never do without
And 6 more things I couldn't live with out...
Craft Beer
Old Records
Pretty Shoes
My Passport
I spend a lot of time thinking about
My next adventure. I travel a lot and there is so much more of this amazing world I want to see! Why I'm not Foxy Brown, "lil" Kim or Missy Elliot. I wish I could rap about Fuckng shit up like they do, instead I will be here, drinking green tea and reading Ernest Hemingway, word. Is. bond.
On a typical Friday night I am
Seeing a show, watching slasher movies in fancy dresses whilst drinking wine with my lady friends, working and or dancing. Trying to rearrange my room. If I move my bed here...I will most likely move it to another spot next Friday.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I wish I was Dolly Parton. I spend hours singing and dancing around my house as if I was she....I love too much....far far, too much. I'm a complete creep. Wrapped up in the most feministic girliest of the girly ballet dancer packages. Followed by some more creepy.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 25–37
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You can tell me something ridiculous, laughing till I cry is my favorite. You want to stay in and have the best time that ever was, at home, in smelly clothes. You want to do something different then "buy me a drink" ....You're not a dick...oh and you have zero ab pictures. Z-E-R-O.