Blah blah blah, my name is Sam, blah blah happy, blah blah laugh, blah blah friendly. So on and so forth. :D

THINGS I LIKE LOTS: astrology, music, color, bowling....what am i doing? christ, just read the rest of this. it's all there, really.

i greatly dislike dishonesty and unfairness. i know, i know, life's not fair, but i really don't think it's that hard to treat people equally and be polite. perhaps it's niave of me, but i think people can be really dumb sometimes.

I'm a Libertarian, leaning more to the Conservative side.

I am opinionated, loud, and excitable.

I'm a nifty mixture of Ace Ventura, Captain Barbossa, and MacGuyver, but a girl. try and put THAT one together. I've also been told i'm the female version of Jack Black.

My hair has been every color of the rainbow, no joke. white and black, too. i think purple was my fave. Right now it's brown-ish, and my bangs are pinkish-orange or something like that.

I am hyper-competitive. no joke.

I say SODA, not pop. "Pop" is a noise. "Soda" is a fizzy drink. Get used to it, people.

I have a tendency to get swept up into things.

Jim Carrey is my hero. for serious.

I love cartoons. zomg. The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack is my fave.

Please, vegetarians, STOP TRYING TO CONVERT ME.

i used to go horseback riding a lot when i was younger and still living with my parents. since i'm poor now, i can't go much anymore, but it's fun when i get the rare chance.

If i could have the powers of any superhero, i'd have to pick Gloriana. she's fucking rad.

The song "Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the Moonlight" makes me happy inside. like, sunshine and rainbows and unicorns happy. you have no idea.

When no one is watching, i dance like a fucking maniac because it makes me feel alive.

I have more energy than anyone you will ever meet. Seriously.

I will fuck you up if you mess with the people i love. No fucking joke, nobody gives them shit without dealing with me.

I have an animal need for live shows. I fucking love mosh pits.

I say the words FUCK and CUNT a lot.

I probably add things to my profile once every few hours, or whenever they hit me as necessary.

I speak in LOLcat a lot.

I don't have a car or a drivers license yet. getting it eventually, but just don't have time right now. i'm also relatively sure i spelled "license" wrong.

The best president ever was Theodore Roosevelt. Just saying.

I am bluntly honest. If you want me to lie to make you feel better, find someone else to talk to.

As much as i have written in this thing, it doesn't even BEGIN to cover my personality. You have NO idea, people.

I feel that my OKCupid Dating Persona results don't quite fit me. I used to be the Half-Cocked, but then i had some sex, and all of a sudden i'm Ghengis Khunt. What's the deal, OKC?

Trying to get healthy. My life is a mess right now and i really need to get my shit together.

Used to work in marketing, but that ended with tax season. :(

every two or three weekends i visit my friends/family in Morgantown, WV.

Also, i'm learning to speak latin in my spare time. not so good at it yet, though. :\

Also also, i'm at Job Corps. Don't judge me. :\

also also also, in December, i'm being a surrogate mother for my friend Shane. :P

Singing. i have a 4 octave range and a pretty flexible voice. i used to act on stage a lot, too, but not so much recently. Mostly musicals.

I also have some strange talent dealing with kids. I talk and they listen. I suppose they recognize one of their own. :D

Also, i can open a peanut butter jar with my feet. long story short, i was bored and a little drunk.

I am usually heard before i am seen.

i've also had people tell me that my eyes are "nebulous" and my body is "voluptuous". Of course, some people tell me i'm fat and ugly, too, but those people usually don't like me.

my eclectic sense of style usually makes an impression, too.

Bless the Beasts and Children is a seriously good book. probably my favorite. Jonathan Livingston Seagull is also excellent. Lullaby was good, by that Chuck guy whose name i can't spell. I read a lot of nonfiction, too. And graphic novels. Marvel Runaways is my faaaave. Watchmen (the comic) was HOLYSHITAMAZING. Love that shit.

I fucking love movies. LOVE. There are way too many to list, so these are some of the ones i can think of: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Connie and Carla, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls the entire Star Wars saga, the older James Bond movies (like Thunderball), Fight Club, The Boondock Saints, Grind, Inglorious Basterds, Out Cold, Mystery Men, Ghostbusters 1 and 2, Blazing Saddles and pretty much anything else by Mel Brooks, 300 in all of its weirdness, Mystery Science Theater 3000 movies are great, Pulp Fiction, Moulin Rouge!, Enchanted, The Music Man, Hairspray! Anything Monty Python is golden. pretty much whatever. :) there are a great many movies that are supposedly "must see" but i haven't seen them. the big lebowski is one of these movies. i know, i know, i fail at life. i just haven't gotten around to seeing any of these "amazing" movies because i'm poor. sue me.

♥ music. if there's music playing, i am dancing. if there isn't any music playing, i'm dancing, cause there's always a song stuck in my head. And cause i'm a little bit crazy.

i have an interesting way of picking things out, too. if i hear a song i like, i download/buy/steal/whatever it. i don't care if it's overplayed on the radio, the artists songs sound all the same, or if they're a trangendered hobo from venus. the one got my by the coochie right now is Sparling Diamonds from Moulin Rouge!. nom nom nom.

The only things i don't particularly enjoy are r+b and country. that song "Ego" or whatever makes me want to shoot someone. for the love of all things naked, just say he has a big dick and get on with it.

http://www.playlist.com/playlist/4301473803/standalone

For a nice sampling of the music i listen to, go to that link up there and look around.

I like stuff i can dance to.

food is rad. i like basically anything. except mushrooms and mustard. and olives. don't like olives.

TV: The Boondocks, Futurama, King of the Hill, Superjail, Mission Hill, One Piece, Paranoia Agent, Dirty Jobs, Fosters Home for Imaginary Friends, The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack. these are all good things.

also, just as a side note about media, the website superdickery.com is absolutely brilliant.

hmmm. Aside from air, food, water, and other essentials to physical life? i dunno. everything is relative.

where i put (insert anything here, really). i'm seriously always misplacing things. it's awful.

hmmm. in a perfect world, i'd be bowling, playing pool, going to the movies], playing beer pong and losing, going to a show (be it theatre or music), camping, drinking with the homies, lifting, or any other number of fun activities.

usually i'm dicking around on campus or in Squirrel Hill, though. :\

I'm a huge Star Wars fangirl. How many bitches you know can tell the difference between a TIE Fighter and a TIE Interceptor? Not many. :D

as ashamed to admit it as i am, you can count me down as one of those girls who gets all gushy over animals and babies. i see a puppy, and even if it's 30 feet away, my brain is subconciously planning the "oooh, who's a cute little puppy? yes you are, ohhhhhh, yes you aaaaare" gibberish for as soon as it gets close enough to touch. i'm sorry. it's a reflex.

Aslo, i'm deathly afraid of ants. those little creepy crawly bastards can get into a closed peanut butter jar! thanks, but i don't want them anywhere near me. ugghhhhhh. i mean, one by itself is okay, but more than 5 of them in one place and i get the heebie-geebies.

Obama gives me the willies. i thinks he's a sneaky socialist, and i do not like him. not all socialists are bad, mind you. most of them have good intentions. i just don't like HIM.

you think i'm rad.

you like playing cheesy 80s and 90s music at full volume and singing along while on road trips, long drives, or even driving to the grocery store.

you want to make a new friend. Even if i'm VERY picky about who i date (considering core political and moral values and interests and all that), i will be friends with almost anyone because everyone has something to offer the world, as gay as that sounds.

If you don't even TRY to spell properly, don't bother messaging me. I can't handle ignorant people. None of that "Ur rly cute, lets hang out sumtime" bullshit. find some retard to talk to.

you actually READ MY PROFILE. i am so tired of people asking things that are already there. i don't just write all that stuff for myself, you know.

and for the LAST TIME: NO THREESOMES OR "ON-THE-SIDE" OFFERS. JESUS. NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOUR HUSBAND WANTS MY VAGINA, MRS. MARRIED LADY, HE CAN'T HAVE IT, AND NEITHER CAN YOU.

i know that seems like a lot of criteria, but i promise i won't ignore you if you write something that's well thought-out. :)