46 Grand Rapids, MI
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My self-summary
I was born on the feast of St. Francis, but I've never preached to birds.


Hey, I just typed up this big long "what the hell am I here for" thing to put in my profile, and I'm not quite sure where in my profile to put it. So I'm putting it here in self-summary for lack of a better place. Enjoy.


Why the hell am I here? What do I want?

OK, here’s the sitch. Let me get some big background stuff out of the way.

I found the love of my life once, married her, had two kids with her, and had thirteen wonderful years with her as my wife before losing her to illness in 2011.

I’d love to find a new love of my life, settle down, and live happily ever after, but I don’t know how easy it would be to make that connection again, to find somebody who is that good for me and someone I’m that good for, someone who’s that attracted to me and I’m that attracted to, or, on the less romantic side, to find somebody who would put up with me and vice versa. I certainly believe it’s possible, but it’s a tall order and it’s the kind of thing you can’t magically make happen just because you want it to. And you know, if it never did happen, I’d be sad about that but I’d still be grateful for what I had.

So with big heavy things like that set aside, what *am* I here for?

I’d like to find somebody I enjoy chatting with, I’d like to find somebody I enjoy hanging around with.

I’d like to find somebody to go out with and do stuff. Ditch my kids. Go on some dates.

I’d like to find somebody to be affectionate with.

I’d like to find somebody to get physically intimate with. Life is short. Sex is fun. And so is just making out and snuggling. For a lot of people that has to be in the context of a romantic relationship or even life commitment; I don’t feel that way necessarily, but I do feel that trust and affection are pretty important.

In an ideal world people could always talk to each other about these things but it can be hard to avoid running on unspoken assumptions about what the other person is thinking and wanting. I’m certainly guilty of that. So maybe laying all this out will help.
What I’m doing with my life
Enjoying stability & security. It's hard to come by and precious. But if you're not careful it can be boring.
I’m really good at
Drawing. Coming up with sometimes interesting, sometimes relevant, factoids to share with people, from things I've read or studied. Being decent to people.
The first things people usually notice about me
"That guy's fat and his his beard is graying, and his sense of style could most charitably be described as 'a work in progress,' and yet he's devilishly sexy. How does he do it??"
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Fortean Times. Lynda Barry. Fritz Leiber. Some odd tabletop RPGs. Richard Sala. Wet Moon. The Dark Crystal. Steven Universe. Silicon Valley. Key and Peele. Yes. R.E.M. TMBGs. Violent Femmes. Richard Thompson. Massive Attack. Squirrel Nut Zippers. Fast Food. Pub food. Sushi.
The six things I could never do without
Loved ones. Support network. Old friends. Art-making & -enjoying. Diet Coke. The bits of technology I depend on (phone/tablet/computer).
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I don't actually have a favorite topic to ruminate over.
On a typical Friday night I am
In the presence of huge nerds.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Still sometimes feel like I'm faking being a grownup, after all these years.
You should message me if
If you're smart and kind and open-minded and goofy and liberal.