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Sarah_schwester

30 F London, UK

I’m looking for

  • Men who like women
  • Ages 27–38
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Sep 28
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Curvy
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Sign
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Education
Income
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Speaks
English, Esperanto, Mongolian

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I've been told that i'm the weirdest girl on here...not sure if that's a compliment. Just to clarify, I'm not (hopefully). Although through reading some of your reactions to other profiles, I'm thinking I might be not representing 'dem females properly as I have no pictures of me kissing puppies, dressed as a sexy cat at halloween, eating cupcakes, or jumping in countryside/on beach. Nor am I into vintage stuff (for vintage, read second hand and over priced). What am I thinking? Don't worry, I'll schedule in a life reassessment later.

I've got my own mind, and am happy to express it (although not in a shouty/bossy way, more in the make a joke out of everything, especially you if you say something silly way).

I'm an outgoing gal who likes verbal stimulation, mostly in the form of dry and often childishly irreverent humour, sarcastic wit and expects significant other to indulge in said activity. I won't hang off your arm and expect you to keep me entertained in social situations, I'll charm your mother, have a laugh with your mates and befriend your cat.

So hi, I'm Sarah.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
When i'm not training dolphins (you've all heard that story in a pub, well, that's me), I work in school improvement and hospitals. Saving the nations schools and saving lives*, one day at a time...

*this may be a slight exaggeration
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Laughing, being an auntie, organising shit, being persuaded to stay out until 6am, spending all my money on snowboarding trips, holidays - I'm ruddy ace at them, and eating too much garlic. I like garlic.

Oh, and breakfast, I cook a stonking breakfast (as long as you like eggs)
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Things of note are that i'll probably forget your name, then only realise i've forgotten it when i'm too far into the conversation to ask it again...so spend the rest of the conversation trying to work out how we can broach 'the name' topic again. It is quite a hard topic to broach a second time...

I'm also good at making conversation based on the barest wisp of information, this conversation may take quite a tangent, but it will be based on something. So, if i send you a message that you think is slightly obscure, I guarantee it will have been based on something from your profile, I may have just taken it further in a slightly unusual direction. Or maybe just to it's logical conclusion...no, I haven't got a clue what i'm talking about here either...lets move on.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Yes. I like these.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Pack of polos (sugar free, not for the lack of calories, but because of the smoother texture. A veritable minty delight)
2. an arsenal of horrific corporate buzzwords to sprinkle into conversations with a straight face - shifting paradigms, glass ceilings, blue sky thinking, they're all welcome with me.
3. no exclamation marks -trying to do a double negative. I COULD do without exclamation marks, they are unnecessary and I have an inherent distrust of anyone who feels they need to use more than one....!
4. Ellipsis... - it's the mother of all imagination
5. Inappropriate sarcasm (raised wry eyebrow is optional, but desirable)
6. Ending stories with the phrase "and then I found a fiver" just to make sure that people are really listening.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Is this site my 'soft launch' of internet dating before I start getting serious about it and paying for Guardian Soulmates?

Whether I can look myself in the mirror since referring to "getting serious about dating" in a public forum.

And whether guys actually 'get' my profile? Obviously it's just a load of tosh that I wrote on a hangover, you get that right...?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Doing all the fun things that our nations capital has to offer. Or just down the pub with my mates. For a change..
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
A guy asked me for my number the other week, I accidentally gave him my mums instead of mine, he called her at 3am...
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You have facial hair*, i'll basically do anything for a guy with facial hair.

You can give as good as you get

You actually want to meet up and see if we like each other. For reals.

You like my pictures - let's not kid ourselves that you'll message me because of my 'witty' profile.

You want to go climbing with me, I've just learnt and am looking for people to team up with...oh god, I've just realised, that means I'm looking for 'activity partners'....

*not obligatory, but it helps

Oh sod it, just do it.