Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


37 F Oakland, CA

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
Has dogs

Similar Users

My self-summary
I live with three dogs. They're all assholes. Just kidding (sort of). . . I lived in SF for 10 years, moved to Iowa for 5, and have been back for a few. I returned with a passion for gardening, the canines, and a strong appreciation for a good parking space. . . So Oakland it is!

I love to cook, read, and work on projects around the house. I am fairly certain that I can fix just about anything. Unfortunately that's not always true, which leads to the occasional disaster (learning experience). I enjoy spending down time at home and am never bored. I have an endless "to do" list. I'm a morning person who works a lot of nights. I still can't make myself sleep in (insert big ol' yawn here).

I get excited about old houses with peeling paint, rainstorms, frosty mornings and spring bulbs peeking pale leaves through the cold winter mud. I notice small changes and details that others miss, like moss seeping, stretching, and unfurling out of sidewalk cracks and sewer drains that no one looks at. Scratches on antique furniture make me smile. The same applies to people. It's our experiences (both good and bad) that make us who we are. This interests me quite a bit. I'm not impressed with a perfectly polished surface. . . That being said, this is not an invitation to dump all your baggage and damage on me. That's not what I'm here for.

I like to say no and enjoy telling you that you're wrong when you are. If you end up being right, after all, I will graciously apologize. But, be warned. . . It won't happen again. I'll do my research before opening my big mouth a second time.

I can be a bit intense. There's that question on here about whether you are carefree or intense. . . I initially answered "carefree," but then quickly realized that I needed to put the cuckoo back in the clock. I'm intense. That's all there is to it.

Some things I find amusing: llamas, teeth on semi grills, taxidermy, and creepy clowns.

Some things I could do without: rejection communicated through avoidance, oatmeal, dirty dishes, and blaming others for your own poor decisions.

It is nearly impossible for me to go an entire day without talking about poop. I don't go out of my way to do this, but it always comes up at some point.

I don't care what kind of car you drive, or even if you drive.

I'm an INFJ. I'm kind of proud of that, though I'm not exactly sure why.
What I’m doing with my life
My parents ask me to explain this all the time. . .
I’m really good at
I grow kick-ass tomatoes, nectarines, and peaches. I am also excellent at not walking in a straight line, plant identification, making up recipes in my sleep that don't suck, and planning ahead. I make sure my socks are right-side-out before they go into the wash so that I won't have to worry about it later and switch lanes before it's an inconvenience to others. I'm also phenomenal at finding at least one good nugget in any crappy situation.

I'm really good at seeing both sides of an issue. This means I can see where you are coming from, but it also means I'll probably give you one too many chances. Sometimes I'm an idiot. Sometimes I call it optimistic.

I am not good at pretending I don't give a shit if I do.
The first things people usually notice about me
Not a clue in hell. . . I notice that I have one eyebrow that is slightly more devious than the other, but both can be mischievous at times, and that would be putting a lot of pressure on others to notice that.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books by Haruki Murakami, Emma Donoghue, Sarah Waters, Jeanette Winterson, Iain Banks, Banana Yoshimoto, Steinbeck, Carver, Bukowski, Hemingway. . . But really I'll read just about anything you put in front of me (except for those damn Nora Roberts books my mom keeps leaving at my house).

Movies: I'll watch nearly anything, but chances are I won't be able to tell you about it tomorrow. Don't expect me to recognize movie quotes. It seems that my head is too full of passwords these days.

Shows: I adore Top Chef and Twin Peaks. I also am a sucker for Project Runway, Law and Order, and Pretty Little Liars (mostly for the hot girls and I would never force anyone to watch this with me). I occasionally get sucked in 90210 reruns. I know it's silly, but I can't help myself. Basically, I'm saying that I watch garbage television. Even though this all may sound horrible, it usually takes me three days to get through a show because I have a hard time sitting still for long (so feel free to give me a slight pass).

Food: I like wine. I'm classifying it as a food because sometimes it's my dinner. I love shiitake mushrooms, kale, figs, cheese, and sea bass. I cook a ton when I can. I make, rather than purchase pre-made things 98% of the time (spicy pickled green tomatoes from my garden, chicken stock, pizza dough, preserved lemons, pesto, etc.) My freezer and pantry are always full of interesting things that are way better than store-bought. My latest infatuation is experimenting with shrubs (drinking vinegars), tinctures, and bitters.
The six things I could never do without
1. My pooches
2. Coffee
3. Bandaids (I can be a total clutz)
4. Books (the real paper kind)
5. My mop (the dirt-laden dogs)
6. A good knife

Of course I could technically do without all of these things. I would just prefer not to.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I have been spending plenty of time wondering if "I love Ethiopian food" is lesbian code for something that I don't know about. Also, wtf is up with all the zombie talk? I don't get it. . . I think dogs are the coolest because they're excited about ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING!!!!! and they are rarely embarrassed about being complete dorks. . . The fine line between communicative and confrontational. . . They say that a woman's bladder is the size of a golf ball and a man's is the size of a grapefruit and I find this incredibly unfair. . . Why do people buy cheap toilet paper? There a few things in life that shouldn't be scrimped on. . . I think a lot of random thoughts.
On a typical Friday night I am
Friday is my Monday. Tuesday is my Friday. . .
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I sometimes pick my nose when I'm driving. Whatever. You do it too.

Whenever I go up or down stairs I count them in my head. There are 6 steps to my backyard and 13 to my front. I know this, but still count. Maybe I drink too much wine and my subconscious self tells me to do this. . . But, I do it soberly too, so I guess that's not really valid. I guess I'm just a counter.

I think I'm really pretty while brushing my teeth. . . It's probably only amusing to me. I'm alright with that. I'll give you a picture anyway.

I balance a pillow on my head in order to put the pillowcase on it. I never use my chin.

I'm a slightly subby switch.

Okay. I guess none of those are really terrible secrets. . . I'll push myself here. . . Whenever I'm stressed out (even if I don't know that I am) I dream about poop and public bathrooms. What would Freud have to say about that one?
I’m looking for
  • Guys and girls who like bi girls
  • Ages 25–45
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating
You should message me if
*You're not a complete douche
*You are emotionally available
*You want to walk the dogs with me. They really are assholes when I try to walk them all together by myself. I end up looking like the poster child for bondage.