Me: Hey, if I wanted to study to become a half-man, half-horse, do you think I'd need a Mentaur?
You: Shut up, John.
Me: Maybe in a Minotaur two. I have to hash this out by Satyrday.
You: Don't call me again.
I'm a work in progress. Which is code for "getting less fat." 70 lbs since last January. The guy who invented circuit and interval training styles can go screw. I assume they're the same guy because I don't like to believe that there are two Antichrists.
I could spin you some wondrous yarn about the panoply of artistic aspirations I hold and how my East Coast intellectual upbringing sets me apart from all the other "aspiring creatives" in this city, but let's avoid starting this profile experience on pitiable self-deception, shall we?
I am a(n): Animal lover. Hedonist. Skeptic. Arts weirdo. Whiskey enthusiast. "Great" cook. Nerd. Feminist. Metalhead. Misanthrope. Fatalist. Optimist. Introverted extrovert. Gregarious hermit.
I'm big, loud, opinionated, educated, and hella smert. I like the same in my womenfolk.