If I had to describe myself in just one word, it would be fuŝfihomo. It's in Esperanto - and it's probably unable to simply translate into English.
So, to start from the basics:
1. Homo means human.
2. The prefix fi- means bad, morally disgusting, so fihomo means something like scoundrel.
3. And the prefix fuŝ- means screwed up. For example, fuŝromano means dull, badly written novel and fuŝnovelisto is the author of such bad novels.

Everything's now clear, I suppose. Fuŝfihomo is someone who fails to be bad. And this words describes me the best. I'm often rude, sometimes even aggressive, but people around me still say I have a good heart.

They generally see me much different than I perceive myself. For example every time I express my political opinions and I get angry and sarcastic, they say I'm funny and I'm just kidding.

You'd probably ask me why I'm still mentioning "people around me". That's as simple as construction of the Soviet T-34 tank. Modern-day "rational" civilization recognizes only two sources of ultimate truth: public surveys and American scientists (oh sorry, there might be also ones from the other countries). The latter probably don't have any opinion on me, so there's only one option left.

Ah, if you're religious, you've probably thought about God, haven't you? Forget about Him! Friedrich Nietzsche said He's dead - and Stephen Hawking has scientifically proven that He doesn't exist. You can question Nietzsche, as he was a philosopher, but in this "rational" world it's impossible to disagree with a world-famous physicist, right? :-D

I'm committing suicide by fits and starts. :-]

I'm also majoring in history and minoring in Slavic philology.

My hobbies include writing (prose only) and learning strange languages - Esperanto, Neo-Slavonic, etc.

1. Writing, as people say. But I wouldn't be so sure.
2. Teaching/explaining things. Got any problems with Old Church Slavonic? :-)
3. Yelling on demonstrations. Hatred is power!

Usually they notice my speech impediment. I say "r" like a French. However, I've always wondered why almost no one spots (or they act as if they didn't spot) a scar on my forehead.

Books
Here are some books that inspired me (without any order):
1. Insatiability by Stanisław Ignacy Witkiewicz. This novel damaged my mind (soul?) extraordinarily.
2. The Last Temptation of Christ by Nikos Kazantzakis. Reading it was simply a katharsis. Partial katharsis, I'd say - the rest would be a conversation about it with someone special.
3. The Count of Monte Christo by Alexandre Dumas. This is also a novel I'd like to discuss, because it made me uncertain if vengenance is the best solution.
4. Medieval Manicheism by Steven Runciman. A scientific book, but helped me much to understand this world... a bit, just a bit.
5. Death and the Dervish by Meša Selimović. I was stunned by this novel, but I'm unable to explain why.
6. They Would Never Hurt a Fly by Slavenka Drakulić. Reading about Dražen Erdemović (an ordinary Serbian soldier who participated in the Srebrenica massacre), I felt as if I had been there myself.
But that's not all, of course.

Movies and shows
I don't watch TV very often and I almost never go to cinema. But I'd like to mention about Waltz with Bashir, Brokeback Mountain, Scarface (what did you expect?), 8. Mile, Sin City.
There was also a documentary which made me leave everything just to watch another episode. Its name was The Death of Yugoslavia.

Music
GLAM - Gay Los Angeles Metal :-)
That's not my idea (I found that on "YouTube"), but I liked it. I have no favourite band - I just focus one or another from time to time. KISS (yes, I know they aren't from L.A.), Autograph, Quiet Riot, Mötley Crüe...
And generally 1980's and 1990's metal: Saxon, Accept, Dio, etc.
In addition, I like rock in other languages than English, especially ex-YU rock. Almost no one of my friends shares my strange interest for the latter, so if you're a fan of Osmi Putnik, Divlje Jagode or any other band, I'll be glad to have a conversation with you.
But generally I accept many music genres - from oi! (street punk) to pop. Everything depends on my mood.

I haven't mentioned Polish music, movies, etc. (just that one book that influenced me so much), because I'm convinced that outside of Poland only total freaks are interested in that. However, if you're one of those freaks, I can tell you what I like. :-)

Food
Mostly Polish cuisine, although it is very fat. Vegetarians curse it, as it contains much meat, but that's just a sign of ignorance. There are some tasty Polish dishes that are vegetarian-friendly. For example the rich variety of dumplings.
It is also important because I'm not a huge fan of meat. I prefer fish, but usually I eat vegetarian dishes.

I like experimenting with other countries' cuisines. I especially recommend Bulgarian cuisine. Чорба по селски, зрял фасул по тракийски, розови палачинки - simply culinary wonders! And баница - yum!
Among the other things I've ever eaten are Georgian khachapuri and Bosnian cake with nuts and raisins (if you're from Bosnia and Herzegovina, you can probably enlighten me what's its name).

Oh, and just one more thing. I often prepare meals myself, but that doesn't mean I like cooking (as people around me think so)! :-)

I won't mention, because that's obvious - air, food, water, shelter, etc.

Politics, ethics, religion, history and obviously sex.
My imaginary world.

Strange proposals made by my friends.

Relaxing at home (sitting in front of computer or book) or meeting with friends. Nothing special.

I'm unable to express my love for my Motherland without being accused of nationalism - and that makes me feel frustrated.

I know you might consider it funny, but you should know that there are still people for whom their country is something more than an accidental place on the map.

P.S. I suppose you're smart enough to know that my location is a joke. :-) It has nothing to do with where I really live.

1. You want to talk about:
- books,
- cuisine (especially if you have any recipes to share),
- history,
- religion,
- foreign languages (but remember that I'm rather not interested in the most popular ones),
- politics (especially if you know any funny stories about politicians).
My knowledge maybe isn't encyclopedical, but it seems that I know something anyway.
2. Your country and its heritage means something to you. I don't care whether it is Russia, the US or Micronesia, but I am suspicious towards cosmopolitans. And I really dislike anarchists. Maybe not hate, but definitely dislike.
3. You're from ex-Yugoslavia and/or have something interesting about this country to share.
4. Same thing about ex-Soviet Union.
5. You speak Esperanto, Slovenian or Bulgarian and want to help me with these languages. ;-)
6. You don't mind that:
- I reply not that often (sometimes even after two-three weeks),
- my English isn't perfect (George W. Bush also has problems with this language, although it's his native one!),
- I'm not as funny as movies with Leslie Nielsen. I wish I was, but I'm unsuccessful so far. :-/
7. You want to know why I have Vilnius in my nick and what I think about Lithuania.
8. You don't have a прозорец in your head. :-)

In fact, everything depends upon your imagination and creativity.