Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
I am well-educated, financially secure, curious and always trying
to expand my knowledge. I love animals and would love to meet a
woman who values honesty.
I will respond to messages. This profile is done in hopes of
meeting someone for a serious long-term relationship. But, I am not
averse to meeting friends. "Friends" is not code for something else
so don't read into it.
I believe the joke that optimists are people who believe we live in
the best of all possible worlds and a pessimist is someone who is
afraid they're right.
I want a partner in crime; a Butch Cassidy to my Sundance Kid, a
Thelma to my Louise, crazy old Chief to my Josey Wales.
We can be young only once but immature our whole lives.
I decorate my house with functioning swords, dogs playing "X"
paintings, and have AstroTurf for rugs.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Extracting dead dinosaurs from thousands of feet below the Earth's
Babysitting children 18-60 years old
Being amazed at the crazy ass conspiracy theories out there like
the one about reptoids
Trying to get to the point in my career where I can own a dog and
actually be a good owner rather than have it caged all day while
Being debt-free except for bills and any credit charges from month
to month. It is liberating to not owe anything and own all your
Translating Dostoevsky's works into Klingon.
Wondering why and grateful that funnel cakes are so popular in
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Mechanical things. I like to tinker with things, do all my own
automotive maintenance, and try to repair things even though it is
not in my job description. While I am not an engineer I do these
things to try and figure out how things are built and whether I
could imagine a better design.
Foreign languages. I speak Spanish fluently and used to speak
Korean fluently but am losing it due to lack of practice. I minored
in Russian in college and am competent with it. My Arabic is slowly
receding but I can still read and write it. French...familiarity
with it. I have my degree in English Literature and love studying
it and its history. I have been told by native English speakers
that my ability is passable.
Reading. No seriously! If I'm interested in a book I can, depending
on length, read it all the way through. 400-500 pages a day
depending on overall length and my interest. I read World War Z in
one night. If that impresses you, or doesn't, then how about the
Ghosts of Cannae (heavy, military, non-fiction) and Dune (the
greatest sci-fi novel ever written)...I read them both in one long
Cooking. I also am peeved when people think that barbecuing and
grilling are the same. They are different cooking processes (like
frying is not the same as baking). But, I can cook very well. Maybe
not haute cuisine, but the aforementioned Cajun fare, chili, wild
game recipes, and simple things.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My intense gaze.
I am like Zartan...if I stand still long enough I can blend in to
the background and change skin colors.
I carry entirely too much shit around with me.
I am tall, furry and reddish-brown like an Irish Chewbacca.
At first I speak little and always say profound shit. After I've
warmed to people you can't shut me up.
My highly offensive, inappropriate sense of humor.
I can recite Shakespeare from memory and have read Beowulf in its
original Old English but sound like a caricature of southern
stereotypes when I talk.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
My favorite food is Korean food.
My favorite movie is "It's a Wonderful Life" or "Ikiru". "Seven
Samurai" is up there. I also love the Aliens trilogy (Alien
Resurrection sucked). One of my favortite movies in recent times is
"Drive"; yes, the one with Ryan Gosling. It is actually a superhero
film in disguise and he plays it brilliantly.
I do not watch much TV but I like BBC stuff like "Extras",
"Sherlock Holmes", and "Being Human". I also enjoy the "Daily Show"
and Colbert. Through Netflix I have become hooked on "House of
Cards", got to catch up on "Breaking Bad", "Hell on Wheels", and
My favorite book is "The Story of St. Michele" by Axel Munthe or
"Baudolino" by Umberto Eco. I also love the classic staples of
English literature: Shakespeare, Poe, Dickens, Chaucer, Kipling,
etc. I also love Chalmers Johnson's Empire Cycle: Blowback, The
Sorrows of Empire, and Nemesis. The Ghosts of Cannae. I also love
longer poetry not necessarily epics or sagas like Gilgamesh but The
Red Cross Knight and Childe Roland to a Dark Tower Came.
Music, all over the place. Here follows a brief synopsis in no
Beethoven (most all classical to be honest)
The Smiths (and Morrissey)
Nine Inch Nails
Dirty Sanchez (the one with Jackie Beat)
New Order (I cry when I hear Love Vigilantes)
Crud (from Detroit)
Danzig (along with The Misfits and Samhain)
Siouxsie & the Banshees
The King, of course
All three Hanks
Willie, Johnny, and the rest
Soundgarden, Nirvana, early Pearl Jam
U2 before Pop!, when they did not suck
I listen to all kinds of music and am one of those who needs it
going in the background.
I also love the sound of my turbo spooling up on my truck as it's
pulling or climbing a hill. The radio gets turned down for that
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My old Army buddies. Time and distance do not matter to us.
Beethoven's Symphony No. 9 in D Minor
My Aggie Ring
The loyalty and love of a pet
Unspoiled, uninhabited places
Good food (o-jing-o bokkum is the best, followed by my mom's German
A comfortable pair of boots
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Halfway down the trail to Hell,
In a shady meadow green
Are the Souls of all dead Troopers camped,
Near a good old-time canteen.
And this eternal resting place
Is known as Fiddler's Green.
Marching past, straight through to Hell
The Infantry are seen. Accompanied by the Engineers,
Artillery and Marines,
For none but the shades of Cavalrymen
Dismount at Fiddler's Green.
Though some go curving down the trail
To seek a warmer scene.
No trooper ever gets to Hell
Ere he's emptied his canteen.
And so rides back to drink again
With friends at Fiddler's Green.
And so when man and horse go down
Beneath a saber keen,
Or in a roaring charge of fierce melee
You stop a bullet clean,
And the hostiles come to get your scalp,
Just empty your canteen,
And put your pistol to your head
And go to Fiddler's Green.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
For, looking up, aware I somehow grew,
Spite of the dusk, the plain had given place
All round to mountains—with such name to grace
Mere ugly heights and heaps now stolen in view.
How thus they had surpris’d me,—solve it, you!
How to get from them was no clearer case.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
is that I will not admit anything private.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Keep in mind that I am very busy. I work in the oilfields long
hours to earn my keep. This means I may go days, if not a week or
more without checking my email. So, understand if you message me
that you may not get an instant response. Whether we might hit it
off or not, I am courteous enough to respond to any messages I get.
And now, the list:
1. I have my own hobbies which I will gladly share with you and
would like to participate in yours as well. But, if you do not like
mine nor I yours, let's not pretend. Just because someone does not
share a particular interest you have does not mean they hate
2. Your profile pics, without context, would not have someone
mistake you as a street-walker.
3. You are honest.
4. You can stand to be around someone who cusses (curses) so much
that it goes beyond rude, profane, and embarrassing to being
comical and absurd.
5. You find that the differences between "there", "their", and
"they're" are important. The same goes for "it's" and "its".
6. You do not have kids and will not miraculously produce any by
the third date.
7. You cannot decide whether the world occupying the space between
your ears is more important than that before your eyes.
8. You have a sense of adventure and know how to set up a
9. You know what S.P.O.R.T.S means...or "tap, rack, bang" if your
GT score was too low; and you get the joke
10. You are a gamer or don't mind me being one.
11. You are not totally cray-cray.
12. You understand that I am who I am and am not a work in
progress. I will not become someone's idealized version of me
unless I want to. I grant the same to you.
13. I have been asked many times about my salary. Do not ask if
what I put in my profile is accurate - it is. Also, if the first
question a woman asks me is about my wealth then I suspect she is a
gold-digging whore. I do not live, dress, or act like most people
that make that much. I don't plan on blowing all my money on crap
because I have to buy swords, maces, battle axes, mint Star Trek
memorabilia, neon beer signs, and velvet paintings to decorate my
place with all that money.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.