Doing what I want to often causes people to think that I'm weird. I take it as a compliment, I think in the world of consumerism and standardisation 'normal' means 'boring'. But I'm not desperately trying to be different, I just do things which I think genuinely matter (e.g. being happy) and are truly good and fun (e.g. being in loving relationships), not what the society agrees matters (e.g. having a job, house, wife, kids and no cellulite). I like naked swimming in the sea, dancing to frantic drum beats, and I prefer to talk about what influence a zombie apocalypse would have on food industry rather than about recent TV shows or sport. Yes, I am a bit geeky as well, but not terribly. I'm into RPGs and like good s-f, but I'm not the lonely nerd type - I go out, like dancing, I play music a lot (mainly jazz, classical and acoustic rock), read, travel, love hillwalking... I'm not much of a macho man, I'm afraid - I find watching football extremely boring, I don't get aroused by fancy sport cars, and I'm definitely a feminist.
What definitely helps in being a better person is the amazing friends and partners I have. I have my tribe. I have circles of wonderful and often very cuddly friends. I am plyamorous and in wonderful, loving, open relationships with Abandaleis and charlierhiannin. I used to spend most of my life wanting or chasing after new partners, more variety, more connections, but now I might have just found a good equilibrium – I am at the same time satisfied with what I have, and welcome anything new and exciting that can happen.
Finding new people is somewhat complicated by one issue which I don't know how to successfully resolve, or whether I want to resolve it at all. I can be really over-cautious and lack confidence in getting from being friends to getting intimate with people. There are several reasons for that: I used to be rather shy and I still can be sometimes, I despise pushy men who just won't piss off and I'm panically afraid to become one, and I really prefer to give it a pass when I see a slightest chance of getting into drama. Effectively, I am sometimes likely to miss the most obvious signs that someone is interested in me, just because I instinctively interpret their actions to my disadvantage. As I say, I'm not sure if I want to resolve this issue, because I think it keeps me away from trouble. But if by any chance you're interested in me and I don't seem to respond, chances are that this isn't because I don't like you, but because I'm just not confident enough to think that you like me. Sometimes you just have to make it really obvious for me, please.