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32 Danbury, CT Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 24–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
May 10
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
A little extra
Other, and laughing about it
Virgo, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from Ph.D program
Less than $20,000
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Latin (Poorly), LISP (Poorly), C++ (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I appear to have not been doing a great job of keeping this profile updated on the big picture. So, happily married, here because there are cool friends to be made. My primary occupation is as a writer, mostly about Doctor Who, but working on a project on British Comics as well. I also teach English part-time at the university level.

As these facts may suggest, I am a bit of a geek. OK, I'm more than a bit of a geek. I'm a massive geek. I am a "plays roleplaying games, watches weird sci-fi, and designs puzzles for fun" level of geek. Just figure, hey, get that out there. This does not mean that I am one of those scary people in costumes at conventions, or that I lack all social skills. It just means I like nerdy things.

I've lately begun describing myself as a man-hating feminist.

I am an introvert prone to that somewhat annoying geek tendency of going off onto overly lengthy explanations of things, but I try to be self-aware about it, and like to think I at least put on a decent show while ranting. My student evaluations say so, at least?
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Got my PhD, and moved back to Connecticut for a year or two to help with my father (who suffered a massive stroke two days after my ex-wife left me; it was a bad weekend) and look for jobs. It turned out there weren't any for a PhD in English anywhere in the country. Whoops. I've steadily transitioned into being a freelance writer/stay-at-home husband to a night-shift nurse.

I've found Western Connecticut to be a fairly awful place to be in your late 20s/early 30s, and am definitely interested in new friends. As the profile says, I have a partner. She is wonderful. We are poly, but I am not looking for anything right now and am fairly close to ruling any additional relationships out entirely, stopping only because I am aware of Murphy's Law.

Mostly, though, I'm working here, learning as much as I can, and starting on my own projects of various sorts. And playing with my dog, which is a strange thing for me to own given that I've spent most of my life terrified of dogs. But I adore him. It is difficult to feel anything but unbridled love for someone who is physically incapable of not jumping for joy when you come home. Sadly, no pictures of me and him around, and pet pictures are forbidden, so you'll have to meet him in person. He's a total sweetie though. We are all, in turn, the pets of two cats, Coraline and Lettie, who benevolently rule over our house.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Most of my time is spent on writing and reading. With a fair amount of cooking. I'm a good cook. And I cook for dates. Just saying.

I'm also not half bad at video games, trivia, and puzzles. I can usually solve the Friday NYT crossword. If this fact carries any weight with you, please, message me, because you're awesome. I am also into, shall we say, more hardcore puzzles. Stuff like MIT Mystery Hunt.

Lately my writing has been the big focus for me - I run a Doctor Who blog, which I turn into books, the most recent of which was the #1 bestseller on Amazon, albeit within the rather marginal category of "Science fiction history and criticism."
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Oh, that depends on how they're noticing me. If you're talking to me, a tendency to get enthusiastic about an idea or topic.

If you're looking at me, probably my beard.

If you're in my class, probably the fact that I'm insane.

If you're seeing me out walking my dog, probably my 60 pound black dog.

If you're IMing, texting, or e-mailing me, the fact that I always write in complete sentences with capitalization. (It doesn't bother me if you don't - it's just that I used computers for writing e-mail and papers for years before I started IMing, so grammar and the like are the default for me. Writing without them would require more work.)

If you're reading this section, the fact that I have over-qualified this ridiculously in an attempt to hit 1000 words for the Profile Completion monkeys.

If you have covertly installed a surveillance camera in my house, the fact that "writing 2000 words a day" and "fucking around on the Internet" are puzzlingly indistinguishable at times.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Last Chance to See, Sandman, Neverwhere, Promethea, The Baroque Cycle, Transmetropolitan

Authors in General: Neil Gaiman, William Blake, Dion Fortune, Alan Moore, Warren Ellis, Grant Morrison, Greg Rucka, Neal Stephenson. Of these, Alan Moore is my role model. And not for Watchmen and V for Vendetta. I like his totally screwed up occult stuff.

Movies: Fight Club, Bamboozled, The Fountain (my absolute favorite film), Tideland, Mirrormask, Serenity, The Brothers Bloom, My Neighbor Totoro

TV: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Firefly, The West Wing, Doctor Who (My single favorite show - I can be led to extended tangents on this point. Or, for that matter, extended blogs.), State of Play, Sandbaggers. I'm not actually watching much of anything currently airing, which is odd for me.

Music: Dave Carter and Tracy Grammer, The Wailin' Jennys, The Smiths, Vienna Teng. Historically I enjoy folk music, but lately I've been much more on an 80s Alternative kick - Peter Murphy, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Siouxie and the Banshees, Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy, New Order, etc.

I realized the other day that I spend an overwhelming majority of my time consuming art created by British people. To the point where my writing style is actually probably closer to British than American. Strange, that.

Food: Chinese food. Indian food. My own cooking. Let's note, on Chinese, I mean really good Chinese. In the Newtown area, that means New Wok.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My iPad, Krypto (my dog), good food, the unreal, autumn, England.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Virtually everything. It's a really unfortunate side effect of being an academic. Then I ramble about it. I intellectualize. A lot.

That's probably unhelpful though. So, major things I've thought about today (Updated such that today=12/7/13)

1) How should I organize a chapter of a book that is about sixty separate short stories by Alan Moore from the early 1980s?
2) When living on a schedule that matches a night shift worker, what is the appropriate meal to eat breakfast food with?
3) What the appropriate balance between the quiet intimacy of the lyrics and showing off the technical skills required to sing it is appropriate when performing "O Holy Night?"
4) What did the cats just knock over?
5) What are the implications of casting Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman?
6) How does one distinguish between the quality of the idea and the quality of execution in evaluating a work of art?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
If we're being honest, I'm probably enjoying the fact that I can stay up late and play video games/read/whatever without being tired when I teach the next day. It's not that I'm antisocial. It's that I default to solitude. Or, realistically, I'm still trying to make my word count for the day.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
has already been admitted elsewhere in this profile.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You should message me. I am fantastic.

More realistically, take the following list of adjectives: Geeky, philosophical, liberal, food-loving, insomniac, intelligent, postmodern, digital, mythic, judgmental in a good way, snarky, mystical, mauve.

If three or more apply, I'm probably interested in talking to you. And seriously, if you think I might be neat, message me. The fact that the norm in online dating is that guys message girls and not visa versa is dumb, and I like getting messages.