I want to write a novel. I wish I spoke Spanish. I respect logic and reason. I haven't had a long-term relationship in over 8 years and haven't dated more than one or two dates for more than 4 years. Maybe I've lost my mojo. I feel more at ease when my house is clean. I have the habit of twisting and playing with my hair. I like cars in the way teenage boys do. I am frequently lost and refuse to ask directions. For about 3 years I have been eating cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. When I go to parties I frequently get the feeling that I don't belong... for some reason I don't fit - so I avoid them usually.
Rock climbing gives me peace. Lately I have felt lonelier than usual. I am extremely fit and I don't have trouble with my weight and I don't like to date people who are overweight. I tend to like men who are tall, dark and handsome and rarely have I ever found a blonde man attractive - not to say it's impossible - just rare. I love greek salad and tawny port and massage and laying in bed reading on the weekends. Or extreme sports. Depending on my mood.
I want intimacy but I am afraid to be loved. I want to love but I don't trust many people. My therapist once told me "Fair is for 5 year olds" but I still wish life was more fair. That said, the universe owes me nothing.
I would like to shoot someone in the tea party with a high capacity magazine - just unload the entire clip - so they would understand what the parents of a 6 year feel when they lose their child to a gun toting lunatic... but nothing would change...We've lost our moral compass. shhhh... I'm thinking Canada.