Mark Twain once said "the only person qualified to tell the story of your life is you". So here's my attempt at a short story:

I'm Chris (but no one ever calls me that...I've more nicknames than a mafioso has aliases), 25, from Akron, living in same for the time being. Aside from the windy walks and what not, I enjoy lots of things, Anything else really from here would probably fall into that whole "What's your story" cliche

My personality in a nutshell is I'm a very passionate (both senses of the term), caring person, old fashioned in the sense that women should damn well look like women instead of unnatural stick figures and men damn well should act like gentlemen
I guess a very easy way of putting it is "what you see is what you get"

Granted, from the opposite perspective, for my repeated yellings, I could be perceived as a pretentious asshole, but here's the difference: I'm admitting the possibility I could very well be full of shit.

Mon auto-portrait en anglais sera plus complet que cette a-p, mais l'idée c'est interessant, et donc j'essaie.

Je suis d'Akron, mais j'habitais a Columbus depuis 2003. J'aime beaucoup de chose. J'aime beaucoup la musique, especiallement techno (downtempo et deep house comme Stephane Pompougnac), les romans de beaucoup d'auteurs (inclus Jack Kerouac, W.E.B Griffin, Stephen Clarke...), et d'autres choses.

I am chill but hyper, silly but focused, and random and on point

I've a B.A. in French, and I wanted to do some translation work in Montreal, or really any francophonic country. Instead, I wrote a novel (135k words) and am trying to get people to read it so I can send it to agents. It's a dystopian social commentary, which is probably going to piss off a lot of people, and very likely get me sued. But if this thing does indeed jump off, I very likely could use that cash to finance any further moving.

Other than that, I'm living, learning, working, expanding and having fun, same as everyone else. It's all about being responsible, carefree and easygoing at the same time, meeting new people and getting to know the world better.

Je travaille a Insomnia Cookies (c'est un patisserie) et étudie beaucoup jusqu'a je peux démenager a Montréal. Je serais pris ma diplome la trimestre d'ete, mais il y a beaucoup de problemes avec les papiers et donc je la prendrai en Decembre

Lots of different things, among which are listening, writing, computer problem solving, advice giving, and just being me. Someone has even given me props for my skills at "ghettorigging" (an edited form of something I will not be typing here) aka MacGyvering. Really, the only way to answer this is getting to know me. (And I swear if I see one ABBA or "The King and I" joke here...assuming people still know who ABBA was and what "The Kind and I" is)

Beaucoup de choses divers

My mohawk. Always. nothing else gets more attention...mostly from the drunk and/or homeless, but I really don't care. I hear it so much from people off the street that I'm more or less ambivalent towards the whole thing.

When people don't notice the hawk I guess the next thing people notice is how white my teeth are. Seriously, I've had at least three women in the last three weeks complement me on that alone.

Mes cheveux, parce que j'ai un mohawk. (Et je suis tres heureux que les indiens ouatouais ne coupaient pas leur cheveux comme les mienne parce que "mohawk" est plus facile de prononcer que ouatouais). Je ne peux pas marcher dans la rue sans quelque personne m'arrete et me demande de mes cheveux.

Books) "On the Road"- Jack Kerouac, Dale Brown and Stephen Coonts novels, "By Order of the President", "The Hostage" and "The Hunters"- W.E.B. Griffin, "Oryx and Crake"- Margaret Atwood "The Catcher in the Rye"- J.D. Salinger, "Fierce Invalids Home from Hot Climates"- Tom Robbins

Movies) Pretty in Pink, Hackers, Kevin Smith and Quentin Tarentino flicks, Lola Rennt, Formula 51, Boondock Saints, Love Actually, Snatch, and Lock, Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels

Music) I'm a music schizo: house, electro house downtempo specifically artists like Samantha James, Colette, Passion Pit, MGMT, Terry Poison, Elek-Tro Junkies, Friendly Fires, Glam.I.Rock Dalminjo, Stephane Pompougnac, Identity, Hird, Kaskade, L.O.V.E., Identity, AMWE, Of Montreal, Aeroplane, Fred Falke, Blaze, Shapeshifters, Jamboree among others), oldies, classic rock and music between 1989 and 1999,J-pop(Megumi Hayashibara, Nami Tamaki, Yoko Kanno, The Pillows, Vivian or Kazuma, Do As Infinity)

Food) Italian and Chinese foods, pizza, burgers, a nice steak from time to time, seafood except for crab, and especially lobster, tiramisu, practically anything from Swenson's or Strickland's, practically any homemade soul food, and of course, you have to have a good stiff drink from time to time

1) My glasses (I've got really bad vision)
2) My laptop (because it contains my music collection, gaming, and an internet connection
3) My book collection (because I know how to read, and don't shy away from it)
4) My cell phone (direct line to my good friends and family)
5) An accomplice (gotta have someone fun to do stuff with)
6) Arizona Green Tea OR cranberry juice (gotta have something to drink every so often that's not carbonated, not that I have anything against pop, I just prefer not to drink it if possible)

Lots of random things, why society is completely and totally fucked up, the meaning of life, is there a person for everyone, what happens at the end of the Universe, who's going to win the next election, lots of stuff. In fact, one question that I haven't been able to figure out is why people watch and like unfunny t.v. shows. I watch "The Office" and it's not that funny to me and yet everyone around me is pissing their pants...

I also spend way too much time for any normal human being doing free range thinking on Wikipedia. One would be insanely surprised where you can end up just by starting at one entry and just clicking anything that strikes your interest. I started searching for the Chicago Spire and ended up reading about eponymous laws and sayings

Playing DD to my friends and generally being bored at bars, listening to music or dickering around aimlessly on the webz. If I could get a nice jump, I'd knock out some of my sequel

I'm slightly necrophobic. Actually, to be a little more precise I'm thanatophobic, meaning that I freak right the hell out whenever I start thinking about my mortality.

Bonus points: It looks like I'm an optimist, which I was. Now, that I've grown up a little, I'm certainly entrenched in neutral, with the potential to become a raging cynic, thank you very much modern pop culture society

J'ai peur de la nécrophobie, mais peut-etre c'est plus proche de la thanatophobie.

You think I'm interesting, like any of the aforementioned things, want to chat for awhile, you take offense at something, want to berate me, challenge me to debate or just plain feel like it for no apparent reason. I won't bite....unless of course you ask.

Yeah, that sounded lame, and for that I'm sorry. Management will refund your ticket price at the door

tu penses que je suis interessant, ou plein de conneries, veux me debater, veux de bavarder ou s'il n'y a pas une raison. Je ne peux pas penser d'une raison qu'une personne ne veux bavarder avec moi....

Ok, c'etait une peu pretentieux, et pour ca, je regrette.