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Stoopac

39 Gresham, OR Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 28–42
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 1:56pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly vegetarian
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Scorpio, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Sales / Marketing
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Has kids
Pets
Likes dogs
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Two quick things:
1. I do not send out a lot of messages because I believe they need to be thoughtful, so if I send one it is because I really think you are the bee's knees.
2. I have put quotes around all of Alisha's comments (Alishajoy66) so you can see that I can also do my own self promoting. :-)

Alisha - "This is not a self-summary. This is Alisha, Stu's bestie without testies and his partner on his podcast- Sketch Comedy Podcast Show. I asked him if I could write a few words about him as his wing-gal in hopes of finding him better dates. So here it goes!

"Stu is hilarious and incredibly intelligent. He is the first one you call when you have a funny story to share or need a shoulder to cry on. He is nice to a fault. Cliche I know, but so very true. Stuart just wants everyone to be happy (being the humanist that he is), so he bends over backwards to make happiness come to fruition. He just spent the last hour of his Friday evening talking with me about evolution and relationships. All that after going to "Guardians of the Galaxy" (which he loved). He has kiddos that are super-amazing, but he's done in that department.

"Again, as his wing-girl I approve of this message. I wouldn't be friends with someone that wrote in third-person."
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Alisha - "Stuart likes his job and is good at it. He is raising his kiddos in amazing fashion, even though he always questions himself (as most parents do, I suppose). He dreams of eradicating suffering for all- not in a Miss America 'world peace' kind of way, but in a 'learn to work through mental crisis'' kind of way. See his own summary below….."

By day I am a corporate sales trainer for professional salespeople. It's a killer job and I love it.

By night I am an Internet comedy sensation. Serious! Check me out with my good friend on our award winning podcast "Sketch Comedy Podcast Show" at http://comedypodcast.net

I'm hoping to make the night job my day job.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Alisha - "Always answering calls/texts. Seriously, if he's not into you, he won't avoid the conversation, he'll embrace it as a learning opportunity.
Being a dad.
Being hilarious.
Listening to your ideas/thoughts and finding a way to disagree with them without putting you down or hurting your feelings."

Alisha forgot to mention sex. She called me to make sure I added that because it was really important that she let everyone know that I am incredible in bed. She wanted to take out an ad about that, but I guess it wasn't in the budget, so she just wanted to make sure that she had mentioned how great at sex I am. I don't know if I'm the greatest, because that is hard to quantify, but Alisha said that I should mention this on her behalf.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
This story of Stuart's I'm leaving because it's amazing…
Alisha - "Instead of doing the normal "my eyes" or "my hair part" I am going to regale you with this little ditty that I swear to you is 100% true:"

This year I participated in the Naked Bike Race in Portland. It was my first time and yes, I went completely nude. It was awesome, there were nearly 10,000 people there and it was the greatest feeling to be completely naked and riding my bike down the street. The party at the end of the ride also sounded awesome, but when I got there I realized that I was, oh how to put this, older... By a lot. So, we packed our stuff and rode home (it was an awesome journey that nearly had my friend and I breaking up a street fight, but that is not this story).

The next day, I evidently did not get enough public nudity and decided to take my first trip to the nude beach. I went to Rooster Rock because I knew there was a nude beach there because I took my kids on a hike and they pointed out the naked people (awkward). It was a nice day and I was pretty excited (not THAT way) so I grabbed my towel, my mini pillow and my book and took the little hike onto the beach.

Unfortunately, it was my first time really at the nude beach at Rooster Rock, so I didn't know where to go, and the beach was actually closed off. I wandered around a bit and finally found a spot near the path. It was on an incline, so I put my head at the top of the incline and my feet were close to the path. It was a nice spot, but I realized soon enough that this was also a high traffic area, which plays into the story later.

I got undressed and got comfortable and started to read my book. As I was reading, I would start to get drowsy and close my eyes. It was always about this time that someone would walk down the path and, naturally, my brain would wake me up with a "WAKE UP IDIOT! YOU'RE NAKED!" And because my brain was yelling, I would wake with a start. People walked by, nothing happend for quite some time. Until...

My eyes were shut but I hear the scuffle of feet and woke up and saw a very large black man walking down the path. No big deal, I see him and close my eyes again. But, I notice he stops in front of me. I pick my head up and look at him as he is staring at my crotch. It's uncomfortable. Then he says this in a deep voice:

"That's a nice package you have there."

I'm a little stunned and I can feel my ears getting red. What do I do? Am I upset? No. Am I angry? No. Am I flattered? A little, maybe more. So, I do what anyone else would do in this situation.

"Thanks."

He starts walking down the path. He gets three steps away and he stops and turns around and pulls down his glasses and says this:

"Those are some lickable balls too."

Meekly, I return a "Thanks!"

And then he walked off, out of my life forever. It was an odd situation, but honestly no one has ever said that many nice things about my genitals.

So, in the end, I would have to say my sugalumps. This story is better told in person, but how often do you see a profile with an epic "The first things people usually notice about me"?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
As far as genres in most of my stuff, I really like comedy, science-fiction, drama and, yes, I like horror. This doesn't really matter much because I am open to everything.

Music is a little different. I think sharing music is really important and can really let people in. So, here's what I have done: I have given you my top 5 artists, albums and a link to the song on that album I would really like you to listen to. Ready?

This is my favorite song of all time:
Pink Floyd | Fearless | http://youtu.be/uCgQuj8v2gg

And albums in no particular order:
Afghan Whigs | 1965 | http://youtu.be/MIJOFF3aPFI
Catherine Wheel | Adam and Eve | http://youtu.be/FO9WfBVx9-o
London Suede | Dog Man Star | http://youtu.be/k43SuOgFZgM
Radiohead | In Rainbows | http://youtu.be/8nTFjVm9sTQ
David Bowie | Changes | http://youtu.be/oP2SS8ggLtU

Also, my #1 book recommendation is "The Four Agreements". If there is a problem, yo this will solve it.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
- My car (because I'm in it, a lot)
Alisha - "A Prius. He cares about the environment, ladies!"
Nah, I do it for the ladies.

- My bed (I'm not in it enough)
Alisha - "He works for a mattress company. There are adjustments and vibrations, for reals."
...and the bed ain't half bad either! (ba-dum-dum)

- Audible.com
Alisha - "He drives A LOT. He likes to learn, A LOT."
Erotica is best heard at 70 MPH.

- My cast-iron cook wear.
Alisha - "The kid can cook and likes to be an adult about it."
What she means is that I do it in a thong and with a lot of bondage.

- My podcast (http://COMEDYpodcast.NET)
Alisha - "This is our baby we grew together. This is his artistic and creative outlet and I know it brings him mountains of joy."
Alisha doesn't know about the a cappella Daft Punk cover band I'm in... Let's keep it a secret.

- "The Four Agreements" - If you have not read this do yourself a favor and get the audio version from Audible... Read by Peter Coyote and absolutely wonderful.
Alisha - "He made me listen to it. It is as amazing as he says."
I have no joke, I really think everyone should read this.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Relationships. Over the last two years I have been obsessively thinking about them. Should they be forever? What makes them fail? What makes them work? What are the things people need to know? If you have a book that helps me on this quest, I will TOTALLY READ IT! :-)
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Typically I am eating pizza and deciding the fate of the universe. I like olives and mushrooms on my pizza.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I would totally give it up to Justin Timberlake or Neil Patrick Harris. I don't fantasize about it, but they are both pretty dreamy...
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Oh, who's kidding.... Girls don't know how to message. Women know how to message. Not very many women out there...

Alisha - "Stuart is the kindest, gentlest, sweetest, most thoughtful man I know. If he cares about you to any degree, you will know it. I know what you're thinking "Then why aren't you with him?". Well, we did date for a bit but realized we just didn't have chemistry, so good news for you! We are best friends and I just want him to find a lady that can appreciate him for all he is, all he has to offer and all the potential of what he will be! So I hope this helps that happen!"

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