It's intriguing how much you change in four years. This profile used to be full of teenage angst and wannabe coolness. Now that this site insists on sending me 'quiver matches' I thought that it might be an idea to make myself look less like a whiney teenager. Also, four years ago it probably didn't take me five minutes to work out three words to describe myself.
So yeah. I'm a chap who likes all sorts of ridiculously nerdery, dancing to music made by computers and angry robots, and consuming ridiculous amounts of coffee and Buckfast. Seriously, that stuff is like liquid dancing fuel. I am also an angry politics chap.

Also, I just completed OkCupid. WIN. There better be a bonus level or unlockable extras, else I'm gonna be pissed.

Staying in college for as long as possible to avoid the joys of trying to find a job when the economy appears to be held together by spit and thumbtacks. I finished my history degree in May.

Ideally, by the time I hit thirty, I will be ensconced in some form of college doing research into historical facts - labour history in Russia, or maybe one of those tiny wars hardly anyone has heard of. If you can tell me what two countries had a war over the refereeing of a World Cup qualifier, then it's quite likely we will be friends!

In the short term, I'm living in Dublin, working away at a masters' in MOAR HISTORIES (Modern Irish History, to be precise). It's certainly been an eye-opener, and it's kindled a real love of Irish history that I've never really had before (except about the 1913 Lockout and that general period, up until the formation of the State and the end of the Civil War.) Trying to beat myself into the vague semblance of an adult human being and doing adult things like getting up in the morning and keeping a house tidyish.

I don't know. I'm a bit of a 'jack of some trades, master of none'-type chap, really. I'm fairly good at writing things and history, and I think I'm OK at talking about politics most of the time when I'm sober. Seeing as a lot of the times I talk about politics is when I'm drunk, this is not the best situation. My main skill is my ability to read like a demon of speed. I finished the last Harry Potter book around five hours after launch I think, and one of those hours was spent waiting in bloody Hodges Figgis to get my copy (and then having a taxi driver attempt to spoil it on us. BASTARD.)

I'm also pretty good at the grammars and spellings, and jiggling about with that sort of thing to make sentences that look/sound interesting. I am not so good at talking, mind.

More than likely my hair. Very few drunken nights out are complete with some random drunkard paying it compliments, which is nice. UPDATE: Hair has gone away, mostly, in a possibly ill-advised attempt to be 'grown-up' and shit. I have a beard, too - most of the time, but only because I am lazy, I'd really like an old-school safety razor. Also, apparently I have fairly nice eyes.

Books: Deep and meaningful classics that discuss the human condition in a Hegelian dialectic... Nah. To be honest, I read a lot of trashy genre fiction, sci-fi, fantasy. Not the most literati-friendly of stuff, but to hell with it. A lot of that stuff is actually fairly crap. For example, 'American Psycho' - I just don't get why it's so acclaimed. Overbearing, overblown, belaboured satire. Terry Pratchett, now there's a chap. 'His Dark Materials' is probably one of the best series of books ever written. 'Fantastic' books (crazy books with lots and lots of weird and wonderful creatures. Try the "Thirteen and a Half Lives of Captain Bluebear", it's great. Despite being a kids' book.) Political books. History. The Princess Bride - I would consider producing small mewling mess-producing units created from my genetic material so that I could read it to them. In the lines of severe nerdery, I recently picked up a copy of the first "Fighting Fantasy" book, "The Warlock of Firetop Mountain", and I am quite a fan of the sci-fi-combat-porn that is the Gaunt's Ghosts series.
Oh, also, that Harry Potter chap.

Films: Amelie, which is probably the nicest film ever. It's the thing I watch when I am feeling a little sad. I've noticed a few folk seem to hate it, and I don't quite know why - is it the self-consciously lo-fi aesthetic? Is it because nothing much happens?
Anything from Studio Ghibli that I have seen so far, especially Princess Mononoke. 10 Things I Hate About You. Wall-E is the best Pixar film. Shaun of the Dead is good, and I quite like most zombie films. The Dark Knight is rather good, too. The Golden Compass (the film) is not however. It is a senseless abusing of brilliant source material that was fun only for my ability to relentlessly tear it down for being wrong. Watchmen confused me - I don't know if I liked it or not. Also the ending makes even less sense than the comic's, which is saying something. Coraline was pretty awesome, as was Pixar's Up.

TV shows: Black Books - I watched Dylan Moran's 'Like Totally' a while back and I laughed so much my neck hurt. Blackadder. Futurama, House, Father Ted, QI, that sort of thing. The classic BBC version of Pride and Prejudice - oh Mr Darcy's sideburns! I'm also looking forward to getting into The Wire, which I've only just started but is excellent. The West Wing is pretty awesome, too, and I do have a soft spot for Buffy even if my watching of it is patchy - that episode with the Gentlemen was seriously creepy. Charlie Brooker's Screenwipe is also excellent - an angry British games journalist ranting about how terrible 95% of stuff on television is, and how good the other 5% is. Oh, and The Clangers. In recent times, How I Met Your Mother and The Big Bang Theory have been my relaxating comedy of choice - perhaps not the most amazing, but comfortable and delightful.
Reviewing this, I noticed I had forgotten the most important ones - Firefly and Battlestar Galactica. Not sure how that happened. Two of the best TV series ever. Both sci-fi, although one is a space western made by Joss Whedon and the other is basically political metaphor having sex with the Book of Mormon. IN SPAAACE.

Music: If it is made by emotionless robot-women, then I probably will like it. Classical stuff, sometimes. Occasionally angry punky-type stuff. Sometimes, everything else from the noises made by angry Japanese people shouting at bins to beats created by dayglo Europeans for kids on ridiculous drugs. Usually, though, I just want something that makes me want to dance around badly.

Food: Sushi OM NOM NOM NOM. Steak. Chinese takeaway when I'm lazy. I also wanna eat more vegetarian foodstuffs. Things which are baked. Caaake.

Friends: I need human contact and interaction to survive. After my best mate moved out of my old house, and I rarely saw any of my other housemates (due to schedules and stuff) I got very very bored and saddened. I need people to entertain me and hang out with.

Alcohol: Not in an alcoholic way, just in a fun social lubricant way. Alcohol is one of the best ways to make friends, I've always found. This may be due to a minor case of social awkwardness, or maybe because sober people don't like to talk to randomers.

Newspapers: Even though i don't read them as regularly as I used to, it's still how I get about 80-90% of my knowledge of what's going on in the world. The Guardian is AWESOME.

A book: I am pretty much always in the middle of a book. Or six books, more likely - I leave books in my wake and then start a new one when the one I want is in a different room/house. To steal an awesome phrase from someone else, I am a total book-slut. Can't get enough of your book, baby.

A computer with internet access: I spend far too much time on the internet. Forums, blogs, a wide variety of time wasting doohickies. I am pretty much continually signed into Google Chat and Facebook.

STRIP SPACE HULK: 'Nuff said.

Why everyone else is wrong about politics and why I'm right. How to best kill imaginary computer pigs in the face. Overanalysing pretty much every form of social interaction I engage in, which is a bit of a bitch.

Usually at home watching the television (and by television I mean a DVD or some form of PERFECTLY LEGAL downloaded televisual media). Going out on a Friday is generally too expensive. My usual going-out nights would be Wednesday or Thursday, because it's not like I have to get up early for college the next day.

I have a large seashell collection which I keep scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you've seen it.

But seriously, I am really really turned off by people who don't read. To an alarming extent. I noticed this when going through Quickmatches, and non-readers automatically got dropped to a maximum of maybe two stars.
Maybe it's a little bit of intellectual snobbery or something, but fuck it. Even though I don't get to do it anywhere near as often as I'd like, and my attention span seems to have dropped significantly, reading is incredibly important to me. I can't imagine spending time on an intimate level with someone who didn't also find it to be an incredibly important thing, who can argue with me about whether Vetinari is a good ruler, or who will go teary-eyed and sappy if I turned to them and put a bit of marzipan on their lips. (Although this is probably not something I would do, it's a bit feathery-strokery even for the likes of me.)
No, it's not really private, but no way am I going to share something that is actually private with the internets at large. That is for people I get to know better.

You feel like it. You fancy arguing with someone about politics. You fancy agreeing with everything I say about politics (boy that would be a nice change for once.) You had to correct about seventeen billion typos while filling out your profile. You're bored. You find me vaguely interesting. You feel like discussing the finer points of Kantian metaphysics (not really. I'm not a fan of Kant). Your internet friends count is low.

I'm amazed by odd things. A while back, I decided to investigate someone who'd visited this here page, and was intrigued by a quote: forty of the fattest pigs, of the sort least good for eating. It's something King John sent in a writ to the justiciars when he was investing Rochester Castle in 1215. I love this phrase now. Actually, I love short snippets of verbiage that strike me like that. So, if you have any of them, or you can explain exactly what a "writ to the justiciars" means (I sort of have a vagueish idea), then please feel free to message me. Chances are if I popped along to your page it was for some similar reason - did you know there are eight folk who call themselves a potato hobo in the US? Or maybe eleven - actually if you know why the hell there is a difference between the number of results this site gives and the actual results, please tell me.

Also, I'm somewhat surprised by the way people need to lay down rules for contacting them. Not because that's a bad thing, but because people do not grasp simple concepts like "Try to spell most words correctly and use fairly good grammar and put the punctuation marks in approximately the right place" or "Do not be a sleazy arsehole." Maybe it is just me, but surely these are basic rules for social interaction?

On reflection, though, given how crap boys can be at not being sleazy bastards, it's hard to know.