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34 M Fort Lauderdale, FL

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–48
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 11:27pm
Hispanic / Latin, White, Other
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Trying to quit
Atheism, and very serious about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from university
Entertainment / Media
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Fluently), German (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
After more than 15 years away from South Florida, I have returned and I am trying to get my bearings.

I am a goofy, bright, man.

Here is the rest:

So I sat here at my computer preparing to write the most brilliant personals posting ever written by man. I was going to describe myself as some wonderfully idealized uberman.
"How should I go about it?" I asked myself.

Perhaps I would post a picture of me holding a crepe that I had just cooked in one hand while cradling an Ethiopian child I had just rescued from the clutches of starvation in the other.
Perhaps I would tell you about my recent excursion into the Amazon in which I discovered the cures for cancer, world hunger, and boredom all while teaching an indigenous tribe stone-masonry.
Perhaps I would describe how one time, while distributing toys during a Christmas drive in the ghetto I got the leaders of The Crips, The Bloods, The Latin Kings, and The Boy Scouts to sit down and talk out their differences and then led them in a very beautiful rendition of Kumbaya.
Perhaps I would write a poem in which, with every syllable, I captured the heartbreaking beauty of pure love. I could almost hear keyboards across the city buckling under the intensity with which women would be responding.

But then I thought, "Fuck it! That’s not me."

I decided to do what no one else on this site has ever done. Be honest. After all, if I did end up meeting someone from this site, how would she react when I arrived on my bike instead of a white steed with flowing mane? How would I explain myself when she realized that I was less the embodiment of Yeats' romantic vision and more encapsulated the enigmatic, disconnected writings of e.e. cummings.

So here I am in all my tarnished glory. Take me or leave me, at least I am being true to self.

First, looks, because we are all, in spite of our noble airs, a slightly superficial lot.

I am 5'8. I never thought this was short. Tall? No. But I never considered myself a pygmy. At least I didn't. But after reading the postings on here from women I have begun to wonder. It seems the women of this city want a caring, funny, thoughtful individual who will sweep them off their feet; but only if he is able to change the light-bulbs of the Sistine Chapel without the aide of a ladder.

I am a mutt. Mainly Colombian, but with Russian, Italian, and Spanish thrown in to spice things up. Consider me a human buffet.
Want a little Latin fire? Help yourself.
A bit of European intrigue? One helping or two?
Some Russian dressing on that? would you like it on top or on the side? If, however, you seek a WASP, I suggest you look elsewhere.

I have dark hair, which is usually shaved off, although I do it myself and, due to my tiny attention span, usually grows quite a bit before I remember to cut it again. I have hazel eyes that lean more towards brown than green which -- and this will be the only time I toot my own horn -- I have been told are wicked hot (ok, I have never been told they are "wicked" hot. But I assure you, if I hung out with more Bostonians it would be a daily comment). I am in ok shape, and am working on getting into even better shape. I have been going to the gym at least 4 days per week for the last month and have no plans of stopping.

Can you rest a beer can on my stomach ala Homer Simpson? No. Can you wash your soiled linens on my abs? Also no. Guess you will have to see for yourself.

Now, onto me as a person.

I am a complete goofball. I have been known to run through Central Park fleeing a swarm of imaginary killer bees while screaming, "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SAVE YOURSELVES! THE BEES, THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!!!"

I am a very passionate person. When something strikes my fancy I can't help but dive into it. Most of the time this is a good thing and I embrace it whole-heartedly. Unfortunately it also tends to give me tunnel vision and I don't see anything else (both literally and figuratively). This sometimes leads to me making rash decisions that wind up biting me in the ass.

Ok, so I just looked at this and realized that I had written the startings of a novel when all I meant to write was a pamphlet, so I will leave it at that.

A favorite quote of mine is by none other than Dr. Seuss: "Do what you want and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."

Yet another great quote is by Epicurus:
"Is God all-powerful but unable to stop evil?
Then God is not omnipotent.
Is God all-powerful but not willing to stop evil?
Then God is malevolent.
Is God all-powerful and all-good?
Then whence enter evil?
Is God weak and unable to stop evil?
Then why call him God?"
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm currently at a bit of a crossroads. I was teaching theater at an elementary school in New York City but had a bit of an existential epiphany and took some time to re-examine my life.

Edit: I just did my first obstacle race and I loved it.
Didn't do to bad either (113 out of 1095 men), about which I am actually rather impressed with myself. I always thought stuff like Ninja Warrior and Double Dare looked fun. Glad to realize that you don't need to be on TV to get muddy, active, and ridiculous. Think it may become my next obsession.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Laughing. Surfing. Making you wonder why we haven't been hanging out more often. Losing my phone. Owning you at Scrabble. Seriously. Bring it!
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am laughing, smiling, or thinking. Sometimes all three.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
First and foremost, the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy. that series is the most brilliantly funny thing on this planet. Douglas Adams, you are missed.

Aside from that I love reading in general.

The Four Agreements. I try to live by them as much as I can.

Other favorite book is Candide by Voltaire. Just so good!!!

Here's a bit more of a list: The Ethical Slut, Sex at Dawn.
The Alchemist, Dune, Ishmael, The History of Surfing, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, Crime and Punishment, Most David Sedaris, All Tom Robbins, The Wind Done Gone (in theory, as I wasn't able to get a copy of it before it got pulled off the shelves...if you have a copy of it, PLEASE let me borrow it!) and so many others.

Recently came across a treasure trove of over 2,000 books for my Kindle and have been reading every day. I am so happy to be meeting all these new people living within the minds of some wonderfully interesting people.

As far as music goes, I like almost all of it. If I were to list everything it would take me years. Let's just say Rage Against the Machine, Jack Johnson, and James Taylor are in the mix. I also am REALLY into This American Life and Radiolab; these two make my brain whirl with glee and thought.

Movies. Again, too many to list. For the sake of brevity let me just say that It's A Wonderful Life is my favorite movie ever. I can watch it at any time. Why wait for christmas?

TV: Sons of Anarchy is the best show ever made, followed closely by Dexter and Breaking Bad.

It's Always Sunny..., Wilfred, Game of Thrones, History and Discovery channel (when they are not showing shit that doesn't have anything to do with History or Discovery), Most Crime Serials, Happy Endings, New Girl, Bones, House (already miss it), 30 Rock, Parks and Recreation, Workaholics, HIMYM, and others.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. A surfboard. I can't imagine never being able to surf again. I would lose my mind.
2. A woman who can make me laugh one moment and have me desperately ripping her clothes off the next.
3. A device that has every song ever recorded. Can you imagine a life without music??? It would be like a heart without a beat.
4. Friends.
5. Cheese.
6. Old people doing the Chicken Dance at weddings!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to make the world a better place.

Also, the human mind and its intricacies. For example: Synesthesia is so damn fascinating! I want it so bad. Seriously. I would totally Highlander a synesthisiac if it meant I could taste purple.

And why the hell magazine publishers think it is ok to tell me an article is continued on page 115 but then don't number pages 84 through 220!!! Assholes!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Anyone who has a "typical" anything need not apply.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am me.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to get silly and are down with silliness.

I drive a Prius. Have recently been made aware that this matters.