Hello, I am a person!

READ: I'm not yet in Kansas but I am moving there in a couple of months and I'm hoping to talk to some people and hopefully make some friends.

I like pomegranates and Rick Moranis and fog and also other things.

I'm a great lover of big dogs and parrots.

But I hate pigs. Pigs and chimps.

I think games (board games, word games, party games, card games, video games, tabletop, whatever) are one of the best forms of human interaction.

I'm mostly looking for friends at this point, but I'm also open to other possibilities.

I love sour things. I almost always dink lemon water, I love sour fermented foods, and I once gave myself a chemical burn by eating too many warheads.

I don't really identify as bisexual because I don't believe in a gender binary, but I am not going to write a bunch about my sexual identity because that would be weird.

I believe in equality and truthfulness. I'd say that I am above average in lawfulness.

I wish I were Peter Pan.

Making a webcomic with the aesthetic of '60s and '70s sci-fi (in both visual style and content). This is still in its early stages and I don't have any online yet. Hopefully soon!

Hiking, jogging, blah-de-bloo

Nursing a sick rabbit back to health through the power of gardening!

Attempting to overcome my fear of cycling. I've been riding 25 miles every other day.

Watching Golden Girls at 2:00 in the morning.

Mushroom Hunting

Coming up with delicious recipes.

Browsing away my life on the Internet.

Pretending that I know what I'm talking about.

I have short hair and a generally awkward or nervous disposition.

A Very Old Man with Enormous Wings, The Yellow Wallpaper, Lolita, We, Peter Pan, The Wind in the Willows, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle, The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, Hamlet, and, in general, sci-fi in short-story form.

Any of the films of: Lars von Trier, Coen Bros, Charlie Kaufman, Paul Thomas Anderson, Stanley Kubrick, Hayao Miyazaki, Wes Anderson. Also: Plague Dogs, Most of the Pixar Films, Solyaris, The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Disney), and scary movies that are actually good (these are few and far between — send me a message if you have a recommendation)

Parks and Recreation, Arrested Development, 30 Rock, FLCL, Mad Men, Dexter, Freaks and Geeks, Adventure Time, Bobs Burgers, Futurama, Seinfeld, The Venture Bros., Game of Thrones, Next Gen (so much)

José González, The Mountain Goats, Prince, Joanna Newsom, Simon & Garfunkel, The Decemberists, a lot of Russian composers, The Smiths/Morrissey, Kate Bush

Broccoli, Peanut Sauce, Cashew Cheese, Noodles, Cabbage, Beets, Coconut ice cream, Tempeh, Brussel Sprouts, Mushrooms, BBQ Sauce, Lemons

Comedians and Videogames: Paul F. Tompkins, Patton Oswalt, Louis C.K | Shadow of the Colossus, Majora's Mask, Portal (2), Katamari Damacy, PixelJunk Monsters, Minecraft, Botanicula, Earthbound

A forest... or at least a wood

I'm really dismayed to have to put "A Computer" here (this includes Internet).

Some nice, thick, well-textured paper.

Some paint or ink to go with the paper.

Epidermis.

That's only five... but I'm too done-feeling to think of a sixth.

Everything... it's sort of the worst.

But more specifically: Biology, conversations I've had with people, the artwork of Jenny Saville or Kiki Smith, myself, golems, other people's opinions of me, gender and sexuality, plants, beer, sex, food, and that time I said something racist when I was 5.

Blaaaah

I have moderate but frequent IBS and I'm not very shy about it.

you love Disneyland!

you can teach me how to program a point and click puzzle adventure game.

If you have a Pathfinder campaign I can join. (I'd be really excited if I could find some cool people to play with in Kansas)

you are anything like Rick Moranis in most of his movies. Especially if you ARE Rick Moranis. Although I guess you'd have to be 1989 Rick Moranis... which would mean you have a time machine, in which case definitely message me.

you don't mind that I will surely wear makeup on the first few dates but almost never at all beyond that.

you choose NOT to announce your Myers-Briggs Type Indicator in your self-summary or describe your tastes as "eclectic".

But also if:

You want to? Why should I control what you do?

I should also probably note that I'm in an open but committed long-distance relationship with my best friend so I guess that's something you'd need to be cool with if you're looking for more than friends.

P.S. I like to look at my high percent enemies. So if it's weird
that I was on your visitors, that's probably why.