I'm a genderfucking, femme, white, trans, queer woman, and a bottom who switches--if any of these identities don't appeal to you, don't bother me. Don't ask me whether I'm 'female' or 'transsexual' as if they were mutually exclusive--it will garner you an insult, and nothing more. I'm highly political--in the queer politics/fat phobia/white privilege sense more so than the electoral sense. I love to cook and eat vegan food.
I used to be militantly poly. Hey, look, everyone was 23 once, ok? Anyhow, it's not ideological anymore, but the romantic openings I have available this year are poly-only. Also: I'm not looking to be your third/hot bi babe/unicorn.
I tend to mostly date girls and genderqueer folk, which is about half my preference and half "cishet boys have a certain tendency toward trans misogynistic bullshit that I have no desire to deal with." Don't message me if you're going to be like that, ok?
First messages that don't start with the word "valkyrie" will be deleted unread.
It seems OKC has a poor grasp on the geography of Chicago, or my location, or both. I live in Uptown.
I'm committed to keeping non-BDSM control out of my relationships. This is not synonymous with keeping it in the bedroom.
Popularizing the word "busted" as a non-oppression-based alternative to more oppressive insults (e.g. "lame" or "gay"). Trying to get the negative senses of "bitch" out of my vocabulary. (why is this word still popular in 'radical' communities?) I like the reclaimed senses, though.
Yes, I am one of those feminists.
Dancing (dirty, contra, folk, or otherwise). Singing.
Asking for what I want without expectations.
Quick, cheap, tasty vegan/wheat-free cooking. Please, doubt me--because then I can prove it to you.
Snarking OK Cupid match questions?
Writers not included in books above:
Fiction: Jorge Luis Borges, Pierre Menard, Suzanne Collins
Non-Fiction: Andrea Smith, Lisa Harney, Little Light, Foucault. Yes, Foucault is on my favorite writers list, yes I know, way to be a walking stereotype.
Films: The Girl Who Leapt Through Time. The Hobbit, Lincoln, ...Dr. Strangelove? TBQH I've come to have a greater appreciation for television than movies, because they're so much more character based.
Music: mogwai, Fugazi, Yo La Tengo, explosions in the sky, blonde redhead, my bloody valentine, sonic youth, you get the idea. But also OK Go, the Postal Service, Regina Spektor, and Bjork. But also Kanye and Lady Gaga and Ke$ha. But also Bob Dylan and Emmy Lou Harris. The Clash, The Ramones, and The Blue Hearts. Throw in Supercell and Linked Horizon, and you prove that theory that no axiomatized system can be both consistent and complete.
TV: Buffy, Madoka, PSYCHO-PASS, Attack on Titan, Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, Paranoia Agent, Sherlock, Hyouka, Veronica Mars, Firefly, Fullmetal Alchemist, Azumanga Daioh, His and Her Circumstances. Yeah, yeah, I'm a Joss Whedon geek, and an anime geek, way to be a walking stereotype. Steven Universe because jfc why are you not watching Steven Universe?
Games: Persona 3 Portable (FeMC), The World Ends With You, We Know The Devil, Shadow Hearts Covenant, Fate/Stay Night (look I know a huge part of it is terrible but but but some of it is really tops)
Podcasts: Welcome To Night Vale, Our Fair City, Rachel And Miles X-Plain The X-Men, 99 Percent Invisible, On The Media.
Foods: hibiscus, chickpeas (hummus, falafel, besan(-pizza)), dolmas, tea, rice, curry, Japanese food, spicy food, millet, sangria, mangos, and lavender. And! Fresh peaches, the kind that don't come from a can, and were not put there by a man in a factory downtown.
Almost everything I have ever put here I then immediately manage to do just fine without for a substantial length of time, so I'm not updating it EVER AGAIN.
Violence: against women, physical, intimate, stranger, domestic, emotional, transphobic, trans misogynistic, institutional, medical, financial, ontological, epistemological, state, police, racist, and sexual. Individual and community response(s) to, recovery from, accountability for. Preventing, processing, responding, healing.
Lately, what I think about most is the nature of transphobia and how inadequate and oppressive describing oppression in terms of a decontextualized "invisibility" or "ignorance" is. How ideas of ignorance and knowledge enable cis people to not see transphobic harassment when it happens right in front of them. What to replace the notion of "ignorance" with.
I care a lot about being intentional with consent for both sexual and non-sexual touch. I used to implement this with explicit verbal consent, all the time, but somewhere along the line came to realize the limitations of words and explicit check-ins, so I'm more fluid about the method. The spirit, though? Still crucial.
Dating-wise, I'm mostly looking for tops/dommes/switches-who-can-stay-on-top. If you're vanilla, it could still work--if you're a sub, it probably won't.
I don't have anything against casual sex, but it's not something I'm looking for right now. And I'm not really looking for new friends except for trans ladies.
Bonus points if:
You're kinky but you understand and approve of the Predator Alert Tool For OK Cupid.
You're queer, trans, and/or fat,
You're pissed about trans misogyny.
You want to watch and/or discuss Great Works of Anime and/or Television with me.
You're tall. Double if you're taller than me.
You have a passion for cheap entertainment and/or bike rides.
You know the difference between femme & straight-acting, gender subversion & masculinity, heteronormatively bisexual & queer, radical & punk rawk. You know exactly what I mean when I say "radicool."
You're amazing & fabulous. You know you're amazing and fabulous, right?
If you're trans: don't message me if you do this. Hell, just don't do it. (This does not cover political or genderqueer profile placement. I can usually tell which is which.)