Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

TentacledCoder

36 M San Francisco, CA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–44
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Jan 26
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Other, and laughing about it
Sign
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Job
Technology
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t want kids
Pets
Likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
A myriad times, my mind has disintegrated into the dark embraces of death; a myriad and one, it has returned. Sometimes I have awoken to find myself in a different universe than the one that I have left. I have considered what to get my subjects to celebrate the festival; I have walked in the domed cities of the moon and made love in the wreckage of worlds long since abandoned by humanity. I have flown without wings to the heights where the air grows thin and the sun rises over a visibly-curved Earth. I have spun stars from the stuff of the shockwaves of galactic collision, and engaged in glorious perversions in shadow universes that bubble up out of the places between the ones which you know.

I am megalomaniacal, brilliant, and modest *blink*
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Moving electrons into patterns which, in turn, bring forth worlds from the froth of potential.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Programming in languages that I don't actually know.

Spreading silliness.

Detecting malevolent conspiracies lurking behind facades of mediocre banality.

Confusing people.

Turning my internalized thesaurus to the production of voluminous masses of sesquipedalian prose of a lurid and turgid violet hue, then backspacing over all of it because it is unsatisfyingly short in the ultraviolet spectrum, then writing it again in a long run-on sentence with too many nested parentheses.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The hat. It is considering taking over the world. Or the hair. It has already taken over the world and currently has designs on the outer solar system. Also it will try to steal your glasses. You have been warned.

If I've bothered to dress up, the nail polish or the way my moustache complements my dress.

The heresies generally show up if they've spent any length of time talking to me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I like James Tiptree Junior, H.P. Lovecraft, Vincent King, Tanith Lee, Terry Pratchett's Discworld books, Roger Zelazny, and Samuel R. Delany, among others. And I love Schroedinger's Cat (Robert Anton Wilson) and the Illuminatus Trilogy (Wilson and Shea). And A Fire Upon The Deep (Vernor Vinge). I thought God Emperor was the best of the Dune books (I've only read one of the prequels, and found it appalling.). I use too many parentheses. The Snail on the Slope (Arkady and Boris Strugatsky) and The Cyberiad (Stanislaw Lem) are both excellent. Just finished Rainbows End (Vinge again), which is, well, awesome.

I don't really pay attention to movies - they're too short and too high-budget to have much scope for the sort of sprawling story I like, usually. Babylon 5 was excellent. Unexpectedly, I liked Fight Club and Pirates of the Carribbean in spite of the fact that everyone insisted they were great.

My favourite albums are probably Funker Vogt's Maschine Zeit and The Darkest of the Hillside Thickets's Cthulhu Strikes Back.

As for food: Chocolate. Pizza. Olives. Coffee. Falafels. Burritos, if made the way I like them.

Also, how could they forget games?
Dwarf Fortress and Nethack are excellent. On the commercial front I quite liked Final Fantasy 7 and Izuna.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Linux, wrists, science fiction, a Model M, and weirdness! Well, I could survive without the first four, but I'd be a miserable grumpy bastard who nobody could stand. That's not six, nor is it complete, but who wants to read another iteration of Oxygen, Water, Food, Light, Gravity, Electromagnetism, ad infinitum?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Whichever insoluble problem I was most recently presented with.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Eating breakfast and unaware that it's Friday until someone points it out. Sometime shortly before midnight I'll wander outside to grab coffee before they close. Which is a mile away, but I'm far too lazy to make it myself unless I'm actually on the verge of withdrawal. (That, and I like long walks.)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
If I consider it private, I'm not exactly going to admit it on the Internet to a US company over an unencrypted channel, now, am I?

Now, things that aren't exactly private (even if it usually takes at least ten minutes of conversation for an attractive CIA agent to work the conversation around to it) that I'd be willing to admit - I have a girlfriend. We're poly. This may or may not mean quite the same things to you that it does to me, but at the least means that if I call my girlfriend to say I'll be home late, the excuse given will be 'am making out with someone' rather than 'the boss gave me extra work today'. (Note: we're distinct people. While unicorns are awesome, dating one of us does not mean that you're expected to date both of us.)
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You really want to climb the mountains of madness in the center of the city for no good reason. You want to show me interesting art installations, or to look for millipedes, or to stage a magical girl duel in the middle of the park at high noon, or to summon Cthulhu to Ocean Beach at periselenion, or to make porn in which the girls are wearing the monster costumes for a change. Not that I'm actually good at making costumes, mind you, but crafting things of duct tape and tinfoil is fun. You want to drink the elixir of the kraken as the sun's ruddy orb rises above the horizon, or to huddle together in the cold and darkness and teach me the constellations of your world.

Advisories: while I don't dislike IMs, I don't guarantee that they will work. I use weird browsers. If you're IMing me and I don't respond reasonably quickly, it's probably that OKCupid is broken, not that I hate you.

You should NOT message me if the owners have decided they want to charge money for sending messages, as I will assume that you are some form of automaton.