• I am large and cuddly, like a bear, but without the mauling and killing and tree climbing ability.
• I enjoy philosophizing about life, the universe and everything, but I remain perversely unsatisfied with answers that can be expressed as integers.
• I endeavor to escape reality through fantasy/sci-fi books and movies. Basically anything that takes place in the past or the future. The present sucks; I mean, we don’t have magic OR flying cars. Honestly I’m not sure how any of us make it through the day.
• I like computers and all things digital. Analog things are too…sinusoidal. Bleh!
• I possess a pronounced proclivity toward superfluous grandiloquence in my diction.
• I am an avid Simpsons and Futurama aficionado. I even have an altar to Matt Groening (in the form of having every Simpsons/Futurama episode on my computer).
• My sense of humor runs the gamut from the facetious to the sardonic. Yes, that whole gamut, impressive I know.
• Ostensibly I’m Jewish, and I cling to that heritage just enough to defend the claim that I can make bad puns with impunity.
• Ostensibly I’m Russian, and I cling to that heritage just enough to defend the claim that I can drink vodka with impunity. Reality tends to impinge upon that claim more than I’d like though.
• I have a tendency to go on long, passionate pontifications on recondite matters of geeky esoterica, such as why Dungeons and Dragons 4th edition is the end of the world as we know it, or why this generation of video game consoles is the end of the world as we know it.
• I’m a wannabe intellectual, in the sense that my mind contains an amalgam of random facts on variegated topics and I wanna ascribe a fancy word to that.
• I’m a bit of a curmudgeon and I tend to rant vociferously about “kids these days” replete with the obligatory “back in my day” fist shaking.
Also, here’s what SparkNotes’ personality test says about me (This is their version of INTJ for you Meyers-Briggs traditionalists):
You are a JUDGE (Dominant Introverted Concrete Thinker). Your affinity for facts and analytical approach to life help you solve complex problems and make tough decisions that others cannot. But don't think that you don't act irrationally a lot of the time. You jump into arguments and hold grudges like crazy. You could probably use some love. While some may see you as a bit overbearing and arrogant, your friends know that you are a trustworthy person with depth and a strong sense of righteousness. Although you are introverted and somewhat reserved, you have a forceful personality that your friends appreciate and your enemies fear. God help them. God help all of us.
SERIOUS NOTE: My job allows me to work from home and thus I can live anywhere. When embarking on my quest for the holy geek (see below) I realized that I might have to adventure far and wide, and brave the perilous perils of the TSA or the state police to ultimately succeed. Thus if I contact you and you're thinking something along the lines of "This guy seems to be within acceptable parameters, but he's in Rochester, NY, WTF?", just reply anyway. Distance can be overcome; (the potential for) love conquers all, etc...etc...