TheDongRanger
35 Tampa, FL
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TheDongRanger
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My self-summary
Yo, so it's me, Harold 'Strap' Coopmore. I'm like, "Hey ladies, you need to get stuffed?" And the ladies are all like "Hells yes, we need some Dong Rangering!" Try not to take it so seriously. I don't live by anyone's rules, not even my own, so don't put your way of life on me. I work hard and play hard, I don't mean that they way most chumps say it. I'm actually erect while working and playing. If you want to talk to me, then talk. If you don't want to talk, what the fuck do I care? Go chat up one of these geeks on here that has a novella as a profile and lives with his mom and has the entire Star Wars collector figurine set. I'm originally from Canada, but don't worry I'm legal now.

I wish there was a filter on here for hotness. I've been on here for too long wasting time on ugly broad's profiles.
What I’m doing with my life
This and that, you know, holding it down. I'm making money, trust that. Just got a place here in Tampa. There are a lot more fatties here in Florida than I expected. I spend a lot of time in NYC because I work there, but I'm looking for some good times in FL.
I’m really good at
Throwing the big stick around, know what I'm saying?
The first things people usually notice about me
If you are a chick probably that I'm doing you. If you are a guy probably that I'm doing your fucking girlfriend.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
One book is all I need...The Dong Ranger's Guide to Giving It to the Ladies Right

Food, I like fresh spinach sauteed with garlic.
The six things I could never do without
Why six? I don't like it, sounds like rules to me.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Women and sex with said women. I like thinking about hockey some too. It seems like a fun sport.
On a typical Friday night I am
Body shots on your mom or your sister or you.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I hope this song starts a craze. The kind of song that ignites the airwaves. My real pic!
You should message me if
Whatever bitches, if you feel like it. I might not write back cause I don't play by anyone else's rules.
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