Sarcasm. Irony. Absurdism. Unexpected sincerity.

I'm a game designer. I direct an international crime syndicate of artists, programmers, and writers in creating video games for kids.

On the side I'm an occasional ghost writer for a mystery/thriller series and I've just released an indie experimental fiction game that I made as a side project.

Fixing anything with an electric drill and superglue. Duct tape is for amateurs.

Making my own simple syrup.

Scrabble, Carcassonne, and Settlers. I won't be held responsible for your wounded pride if you challenge me and lose.

Random acts of quesadilla.

My height. And being tall is great. But on the other hand, in a loud bar I can't hear you talking. Because, at your altitude, you're speaking into my nipples. And nipples may be sensitive, but they're not sensitive enough to hear things.

Challenge mode: list just one for each.

Books: A Song of Ice and Fire, a.k.a. Game of Thrones. Not because it's my absolute favorite, but because it never fails to spark a good conversation.

Movies: Moulin Rouge. I believe in truth, beauty, freedom, love, and dying of consumption.

Shows: Flight of the Conchords. And I think Jemaine is the sexier one. His sideburns are like the twin pillars of an ancient temple to hotness.

Music: The Cure. They're one of those bands that you just keep coming back to.

Food: I've found the restaurant with the best burger in NY. Dear Everyone Else In New York Who Isn't A Vegetarian: you're wrong about this one. I've found it, and I'm not sharing.

1. Being able to walk to work.

2. My wall of musical instruments.

3. Outdoor basketball courts. Exercise just isn't fun if you can't try to dominate your opponents.

4. New music. Well, new to me. Pre-owned is fine. Discovering it at a concert is ideal.

5. A stainless steel frying pan. Unstoppable taste creation machine. Also stops bullets way better than flimsy teflon.

6. EBooks delivered straight to my phone, so I can read while in the dark, on the subway, or hiding from the FBI.

How long we can get away with holding Bourbon Thursdays at a the office before it goes too far and I get fired.

Whether and how subjective experience can be measured and quantified by science.

DANCE MASTER GENERAL'S WARNING: If the music's playing and the lights are low, I may dance. I'm not a crazy spaz or Serious Ballrom Dancer, but if you prefer the guys who stand at the wall with a beer or do the "vaguely rhythmic I'm-a-chill-bro head bob," then you're probably not on the right profile. Best to go back to the guys with the shirtless mirror pics.

I'm compulsively honest. It always surprises me how much people use little lies to make their lives easier, and how much it ends up actually complicating them.

My female friends will be a little bit intimidated by you.