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33 M Saint Louis, MO

My Details

Last Online
Aug 11
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has a kid, but doesn’t want more

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
As you can see, I rock a beard almost all the time, sometimes I get bored, give myself chops, immediately think I look like a dingleberry, shave it all off and start over. Sometimes I don't think about trimming my beard and end up growing a big bushy Rabbi looking thing. I can't seem to grow hair in the middle of my lip, sometimes that bothers me and I'll shave the whole mustache off and rock it Amish style for a while. However, you will never see my mustache with no beard, thanks to Dateline that style isn't too popular these days. As you see, right now my beard is nicely trimmed, in order to "sassify the womens".

I'm the lead singer of a metal/punk/scumrock band, I act and do stunts for crappy B movies, and I get in the ring every now and then and do a little "pro-wrasslin".

Yeah I'm one of those risk takers.....Sometimes I even text and drive! I'll take you riiiight intooo thaaa danga zone!! - Kenny Loggins

My job.....I clean junk left behind from foreclosed houses. Short name for it: Junk Hauler. I do other handy man type shit too. Yeah I can hammer nails and all that good stuff, and that's usually what I'm doing most of the time so I don't have much need for a suit and tie. I do have one suit that I bought at the thrift store for 12.95, I use it for weddings and funerals, it works since those two words are synonymous in my world. But if you go out with me I'll put on my nicest stained wife beater and corduroy pants with some penny loafers and argyle socks, I'm a real snazzy dresser when going out on the town. And I'll take you out for some real fancy time cuisine, like steak.........and shake. Oh yeah.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working, and melting faces right off when playing out with my band. If you've ever seen Raiders of the Lost Ark when the Nazi's face melts off, that's what happens to people when we play. I'm told I sound a lot like Lionel Richie, that is if he were to rub his larynx with sandpaper.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Not being good at anything, I kick ass at it. I can do the worm pretty good, though. I also play a mean cowbell and I am the world's greatest kazoo player, and that ain't no jive.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My manly man-beard, and if I'm not wearing a shirt, the tattoo on my back, which is the drummer from Def Leppard's missing arm. It's in my pictures. Basic explanation: I thought it was funny. Maybe when I'm 80 I won't think it's so funny, but then again I probably won't remember my own name, so who cares? Not me that's for sure.

But hey, it's better than wizards, dragons, and Chinese lettering, right? Everyone knows that guy and he's no fun. That's the kind of guy who's been to prison and does the Silence of the Lambs dance alone in his basement. And if that's your kind of thing, then that's cool. I'm just saying that I'm the kind of guy who'd rather do the dance in the company of friends, you know? At least keep it social.

My next tattoo will be of my own ass, on my ass. The logic behind this is that it will always be current. If I gain weight, it gets bigger. If I lose weight, it shrinks. When I'm 80 and it sags and flattens out like a pancake, boom, you get the point. It's the ultimate tattoo as it will always update itself. I'm a super genius.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Wuts a buk? Alright there's one, Alphabet of Manliness. Highlights if that counts, Goofus is cool. As long as there's more pictures than words, then I'm good.

It's a bit weird because I kicked complete ass in English and other such subjects, and I used to read the shit out of books. For real, I'd read them so much they'd shit.

Planet of the Apes (original), Clan of the Cave Bear,Iceman, Encino Man, Caveman, Teenage Caveman, One Million Years B.C.....see a pattern here? I'd name off regular ones but I don't want there to be a combo breaker. But I like a lot of them moving pictures.

Ozzy Osbourne, Megadeth, Exodus, S.O.D., Ramones, Motorhead, GG Allin, Circle Jerks, Dead Boys, Eazy E, Group X, Wesley Willis, and Neil Mother Fuckin Diamond


I'm not big on the TV "wartching" (that's how my mom says it). I still haven't bought into the "digital flat screen HD 3D handles your bank balance and does your taxes" TV set yet, so I have a digital converter box and don't know where the remote is half the time. I'd get up and change the channel old school style but there's no buttons on the damn thing, it's like it promotes laziness. So if I watch any TV shows I do it on this here computer machine, and I usually just stick with Kenny VS Spenny, Married With Children, and old Twilight Zone episodes.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My beard
My crappy '89 GMC (fancy riding right there)
All you can eat Chinese buffets
Beef Jerky
Home Depot Hot Dogs
Breaking rules <----See what I did there? Fuck yo limits.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Swimming pools. I wish I was in one right now. The water's all clear and cool, and you spin around in there like an egg. If you can name what movie that's from, you are the winner.

About 5 minutes before I wrote this next sentence, I spent the entire time wondering why Limp Bizkit is still a band. Now I know 5 minutes is not "a lot of time", but it is when you're thinking about Limp Bizkit.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hunting Woolly Mammoth
Going to clubs...not to dance, but to drop kick yuppies. Enter club, dropkick yuppie, yuppie spills fruity drink all over his stupid button up shirt, exit club, go to Waffle House, demand a pancake.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I think the people who wrote the music for Milli Vanilli were a great band.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–100
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You like beards
I don't know what my reply thing says but I answer all messages. That's how I roll sucka foo.