My name is Plato but nothing about our relationship will be
platonic (ZING). I was born in 427 B.C. in Aegina (or Athens),
Greece. I used to be the student of my best friend Socrates but now
I teach at my own school. The curriculum has to do with the most
important philosophical questions every human being should address.
My crash introductory course is The Allegory of the Cave.
Basically, I introduce people to the reality that they are living
in a world of shadows while the real forms, the Ideal forms, exist
in a higher, more True world than this called the Noumenal World.
The Allegory of the Cave, although a literary device (and I hate
literary devices) works well to get the point across. Now don't
believe the rhetoricians out there that are going to try to
persuade you otherwise: there IS one Absolute Truth. All the things
you see in this world are merely imperfect reflections of it. In
the famous words of Biggie Smalls: IF YOU DON'T KNOW, NOW YOU KNOW
[blank]. People that diabolically try to teach you otherwise,
teaching you rhetoric without a moral compass, are straight
manipulators. AVOID THEM AT ALL COST.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm TRYING to dissuade people from living in The Cave. I'm a slave
to this ideal (hah-hah) so I'm spending my whole life recruiting as
many people as possible into the small ring of Philosopher-Kings
meant to bring about an Earthen Utopia. Of course, this Earthen
Republic would be no match to what it reflects, The Noumenal World,
but it would be a whole metric shitload better than what we live in
now. I have a School, called The Academy if you want to check it
out and hear my lectures, so I spend a bunch of time there too
educating people and stuff.
I’m really good at
practically everything, if you want the Truth. I'm good with
dialectic speech. I'm good at teaching by using the Socratic
Method. I'm good at giving advice because I don't try to manipulate
people. I'm good at intense concentration and studying.
The first things people usually notice about me
are my awesome robes and my eloquent way of speaking and thinking.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
NOTHING. NONE OF THAT MATTERS. THAT'S ALL MIMETIC BULLSHIT AND IT'S
DISTRACTING YOU BY CAUSING YOU TO BELIEVE IN THE REAL, PHYSICAL
WORLD AND THE ILLUSIONS CONTAINED WITHIN THAT CONCEPT. If you want
to read something, read what I write. That's the only way you're
safe. You think you like food? You like cookery, so you suck.
You're tricking your tastebuds into thinking something is healthy
when you could be taking medicine and doing gymnastics and
tightening up those sweet abs that I know you could have. I am
obviously searching for gay males but I want to make it clear that
cosmetics of any kind are NOT my thing.
The six things I could never do without
1.) Philosopher-Kings (because I am one. I mean, I could not
physically exist without myself.) (or could I?)
2.) The Noumenal World.
3.) Socrates and/or all of his sublime teaching.
4.) The single Absolute Truth
6.) You in my open, loving arms.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The Noumenal World. When you say "thinking about" I'm just going to
assume you mean remembering and recollecting. That's what I'm doing
when I'm "thinking about" the Noumenal World.
On a typical Friday night I am
going to parties and debating things. Usually I'm hammered but I
still have a pretty decent mastery of the Greek Language in that
state. It is at least sufficient enough to wipe the floor with the
Sophist arguments. That, OR I'm writing psuedo-plays starring my
first love, Socrates. I just write what I want to say but I put it
in his mouth because it's more literary and possibly more concise
(I say that sort of ironically).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I secretly like rhetoric. I am secretly an artist. I hate myself.
You should message me if
you want to party. I am ALWAYS down to party.