Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My name is Michael. I'm holding a goose.
If you like going to interesting places to take pictures then I
would like to accompany you on these endeavors.
Note: all my pictures are from at least a year ago and since then I
have achieved my life goal of gaining 700 pounds. If you have a
problem with my
rolls curves you can just move
(I got about halfway through updating this profile after moving and
getting a new job. Sorry if it's confusing (not really))
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Worked as a programmer in a multinational corporation in
California, got bored, and went to the University of Maryland to
learn some science. I'm not bored anymore.
Until spring of 2015, I worked for a nuclear/particle physics
laboratory, where we examined the most basic laws of nature using
cutting-edge atom trapping and spectroscopy technology. I haven't
figured out a way to fully explain what the overall purpose of the
experiment was without boring people, but here's a video I made
I'm trying very hard to move to my dream city (Seattle, WA) pretty
soon. It just so happens there are plenty of labs there researching
the kind of stuff I'm already working on.
Update: I've moved to Seattle, and work at a nuclear physics lab at
UW. I'm not sure how long I'll stay here. I'm leaning more heavily
towards "forever" though.
Various disjoint hobbies: photography, copperplate-style writing,
trying to learn the violin which I started doing way too late,
volunteering at the county animal shelter.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Cooking, photography- Here are some pictures
I'm probably above average at
archery, programming, ice skating
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Favorite band: Lunasa.
Favorite song: Eanair
No I'm not Irish.
Favorite movie: "The Grand Budapest Hotel". They might as well just
stop making movies now because no movie is ever going to be as good
as that one.
I also like watching Gordon Ramsay's shows (the UK ones, not
dumbed-down American versions)
Anything that isn't
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
How to gain 700 pounds, and which of OkCupid's euphemisms for
"morbidly obese" I should select once I attain that goal.
Update: Done! Where's my disability check?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Finally, nothing is required of me for two days. I'm going to
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The most private thing I'm willing to tell to any stranger who
comes across this page? ...
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Above all, I appreciate someone with an absurd and abstract sense
of humor. Having respect for life, and a love of science are huge
I'd like to find more friends who are intelligent enough to change
my mind about stuff. I am impressed by people who have become
competent at something for reasons other than their family
I'm mostly interested in making new friends here but may be
interested in more than that if you're vegetarian- I don't date
I find excess consumption to be immoral, and therefore obesity is a
telltale sign that someone is a bad person. Do not message me if
you are overweight and expect a pleasant response.
If you say you like baking but all you've "baked" are cupcakes
and cookies using powdered mixes from boxes then you're a liar and
I don't want anything to do with you. I'm sick of you people
misrepresenting yourselves. I bake more complicated things than
that for breakfast.
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.