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21 Amherst, MA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–24
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 5:27pm
5′ 3″ (1.60m)
Body type
Strictly anything
When drinking
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Cancer, and it’s fun to think about
Working on university
Less than $20,000
Mostly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Has dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a 21-year-old punk rocker with a cute dog, an almost-broken guitar, and one hell of an overactive imagination; an aspiring musician, actor, and/or writer; extremely enthusiastic about words, and people who use them well; equally enthusiastic about music, art, and anyone who's passionate about anything. I create original music and will probably throw some of it at you if you express interest.

Pretty much everything fascinates me. Sarcasm and stupid puns are as indispensable to me as books and music are. And, of course, if you want to get a really accurate sense of the kind of person I am, hey, talk to me, because we're all defined by how we appear to other people and yadda yadda apparently it only takes two fuckin' paragraphs for me to dive headfirst into the Cliche Pit.

Basically I'm here want to meet interesting people and talk to them and have excellent experiences. And possibly make out/have sex with them if attraction happens but that's not by any means necessary for me to want to get to know someone.

And this is too long already but whatever; I might as well also make it clear that I absolutely despise dishonesty, intolerance (especially homophobia and the shaming of those with mental illnesses), and anything that could loosely be described as "bullshit." I'm extremely straightforward and leave little unsaid, especially when it comes to relationships, and I try to encourage others to be the same.

I've been told I sound way more serious here than I actually am in real life. Kind of a goofball, really. I will 100% act like a enormous dork around those I'm comfortable with.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
-History major at UMass Amherst by winter, waging the War on Tourism in Boston with the Charles RIverboat Company by summer.
-Deciding whether to go into academia or law, something else, or saying fuck it all and trying to play music or act seriously.
-Meeting excellent people, having adventures, screwing up my sleep schedule constantly.
-Wishing I could get back into rock climbing, paintball, and other things I did all the time when I was sixteen. Just like every other 21-year-old ever.
-Trying to find something I can do to make the world a better place and fight the outrageous BS out there, besides calling the bastards out in the three-minute/three chord format.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Playing power chords and four-note guitar solos very fast and sloppily, acting, making words do the word thing, coxing crew, finding stuff to do in Boston.

Writing songs about liberal politics, girls with peculiar names, anxiety, the city of Boston, and alcoholic ex-criminals with gambling debts getting whacked by their creditors and dumped in shitty rivers in upstate New York. Among other things.

Friend: "You have the butt dialing skills of a god."
Me: "I'm not even sure how that happened. I'm not wearing pants."
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My terrifying and imposing figure, of course! I'm strong for my size but built like a rail. Hopefully the kinda-short/really-damn-skinny thing isn't an issue for anyone. It used to be for me. (On that note, if you have a good short joke, please tell it to me because I love them. I swear I'm not being sarcastic. I'll tell you my favorite one if you ask.)

Also my unbelievably intense cheekbones, the fact that my face makes me look vaguely pissed off all the time even though I almost never am, and my habit of swearing kind of a lot.

"Why does your wardrobe seem to consist entirely of Chucks, jeans with the cuffs all fucked up, and shirts with bands on them?"
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Music: Rock in most forms, but punk rock above all. My perennial favorites are The Clash, Ramones, Green Day, Rancid, Social Distortion, and The Replacements (a band that sort of summarizes my personality—ask if you want to know what that actually means). The Offspring, Rise Against, The Hives, The Bouncing Souls, Dropkick Murphys, Talking Heads, blink-182, The Who, Led Zeppelin, Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Iron Maiden, The Decemberists, The Mountain Goats. Message me if you like or have ever even heard of Dire Straits.

Books: science fiction and dystopia, alternate history, extremely entertaining Hunter S. Thompson-esque stories about crazy shit,; Shakespeare! (Midsummer; Macbeth; Hamlet); Ender's Game and its series (despite the author being an ultra-conservative, homophobic asshat), 1984, On The Beach, The Catcher in the Rye, Franny and Zooey, Animal Farm, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, A Clockwork Orange, Slaughterhouse-Five, On The Road, World War Z, Looking For Alaska. Right now I'm falling in love with John Updike's short stories.

TV: Family Guy, Band of Brothers, The Pacific, 24, Rescue Me, Homicide, Homeland, Fargo, Seinfeld. I have a lot of shows I'd really like to watch—especially Doctor Who, Breaking Bad, Orange is the New Black, and The Wire—but I don't really like watching series alone. So hey maybe that's part of why I'm here.

For movies, I like Quentin Tarantino, the Coen Brothers, anything with Will Ferrell in it, historical war films, sic-fi stuff and the occasional pretentious avant-garde BS.

I'll try pretty much any food at least once. Burritos, Italian, and seafood are my favorites. Pasta goes with anything. And despite my best efforts I'm pretty sure I've never reached 110 pounds.

Favorite video games are Fallout, Just Cause, Far Cry, Bioshock, Civilization, Total War, Company of Heroes, SimCity, Call of Duty (the older the better).

Huge fan of xkcd and Questionable Content.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Guitar and amp, books, friends I can trust, diabetes medication, sarcasm, Internet (specifically Wikipedia).

Honorable mention: gin and [preferably diet] tonics are easily my favorite drink and I'd be quite sad without 'em. There's a story behind that.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Lyrics, free will, the lives of people I see randomly on the street or on trains, injustices and exploitation in the world, and—surprise surprise for a straight cis dude—gender (which is probably the result of having dated several bi/queer/not-totally-binary girls). I know saying "I think about everything" is one of those awful OkCupid cliches, but it's legitimately true, and part of the reason I like talking to new people so much is that it keeps me from getting wrapped up in my own head.

Oh, and the novel or series of short stories I may eventually write about the fascinating experience of online dating. Seriously!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
At a local open mic night with a blind guy and a dog, playing acoustic-ified punk rock; gaming nights with friends; tipsy campfire singalongs; house parties; playing guitar or video games with my cat as audience.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am not ashamed to admit that I first got into punk rock by way of Green Day. On that note, I'm pretty sure I'm straight but I might (definitely) have a tiny little man crush on Billie Joe Armstrong.

(Alright, if we're being all straightforward here, the *actual* most private things I'm willing to admit are probably sexual, but I really don't want to come off as That Guy Who Blatantly Talks About Sexual Stuff In His Profile, so ask me if you actually want to know. For example, about the most horrifyingly awkward experience of my life.)
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You read all that? Cool. If you want to talk to someone who finds everything interesting, go to some local shows (music or theatre), help me find or create delicious low-sugar cocktails, watch excellent TV, or just find random adventures in the Valley (fall/winter) or Greater Boston (late spring/summer).