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The_True_Self

22 Denton, TX Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–30
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Dec 10
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Overweight
Diet
Anything
Smokes
Sometimes
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Cancer, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Working on university
Job
Hospitality
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm crude and blatant. That being said:

I always used to think my mom was verbally abusive when I was growing up because she'd always tell me I'd grow up to be a big pussy. Little did I know she was just trying to teach me a lesson from the school of "you are what you eat".

I'm not looking for anything too serious, but if you want to hang sometime and go poke dead bodies with sticks or shotgun the entirety of Avatar: The Last Airbender some time, let's do it.

Credentials:
- Time Magazine's "Person of the Year 2006"
- Undisputed Planking World Champion 2014
- Can change light bulbs on his own without any additional qualifiers
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Getting close to graduating in Hospitality MGMT at UNT. Telling jokes at Mable's on Tuesday nights. Working on 3 shows with ntTV this semester (Fall 2014).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Cuddling, clapping obscenely loud, singing Disney Princess songs, and rolling hand towels.

In that order.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Is that I, in no way, shape or form, resemble the lovable flightless bird known as the Kiwi, save for that we are both:

1. Flightless
2. Lovable
3. Very, very hairy
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: No Country for Old Men, Watchmen, V for Vendetta, John Hodgman's The Areas of my Expertise, Max Brooks novels, and Harlequin romances read in inappropriate places.

Movies: Pulp Fiction, Rocky Horror, Back to the Future, Psycho, The Cabin in the Woods, Scott Pilgrim vs. The World, Edgar Wright's Cornetto Trilogy, The Room, UHF, and Kentucky Fried Movie. There's a lot more, but let's keep it sweet.

Shows: Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Legend of Korra, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Arrow, @midnight, Key and Peele, Bob's Burgers, Broad City, Agents of SHIELD, Parks and Rec, Spaced, Mr. Show with Bob and David, BoJack Horseman

Music: The Protomen, 80's Pop, New Wave, Disco, Dire Straits, Gorillaz, Childish Gambino, Marina and the Diamonds, Devotchka, Tenacious D, URIZEN, Puddin' Taine, Nobuo Uematsu Soundtracks, Disney Princess songs along with assorted tracks from musicals, 88.1 - The One, a lot of stand-up albums (Top Comics: John Mulaney, Kyle Kinane, Patton Oswalt, Jackie Kashian, Maria Bamford, Myq Kaplan, Mike Birbiglia, Matt Braunger, Doug Benson, Dalton Pruitt)

Games: Kingdom Hearts franchise (all of it), The World Ends With You, FTL, The Binding of Isaac, Dungeons of Dredmor, Mega Man II, Ni No Kuni, Ace Attorney, some Pokemon, Team Fortress 2, Osmos, Final Fantasy VI, Dominion, Munchkin, Cards Against Humanity, Apples to Apples, and the obligatory Settlers of Catan.

Food: Tex-Mex, Thai, Coffee, Coffee, Really good coffee, Tea, More Tea, Amitea, Black-Green-White-Red-Herbal Tea, & BBQ
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Social interaction.
2. Engaging works of fiction I can get into.
3. Internet access.
4. Long-ass showers, at night, in the dark.
5. Physical contact.
6. My sense of humor. It is most definitely twisted and flexible. I can find anything, absolutely anything, hilarious, given the proper treatment.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
how if I could have one super power, it would be the ability to transmute fat - to just be able to painlessly rip off globs of my own/other people's fat and be able to throw it onto skinny people and have it absorb into their skin. Or use the power to give painless breast augmentations and make easy money.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Either out on the town listening to music, doing dinner with my brother, or taking it easy at home with a mug of tea.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I don't think I could ever have kids - not because I think I'd drop 'em or psychologically scar 'em via an idle TV and negligence, but because I know that from the moment that kid is born to the day he/she goes out into the world, I'd spend every second of every minute of every hour of every day thinking, "Am I actively forming my child's fetish right now?"

You think Space Jam and The Jungle Book are harmless now, but when you find furry hypnosis porn left on your browser history 7 years later...
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you, too, underscore all serious/montage moments of your life with "Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)" by Journey.