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29 Oakland, CA Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 25–35
  • Near me
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Today – 7:41pm
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body type
Mostly anything
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Scorpio, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Open relationship
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
NOTICE: For your browsing convenience, I've added a TL;DR to the bottom of my lengthier sections. So scroll down if you're impatient!

Hello! I'm Thistlebee! I am a twenty-nine-year-old Californian human! I'm a gamer and a geek. I love craft beer and humor. I've got a (un)healthy dose of social anxiety, which I attempt to offset in conversation using the non-skills learned from my non-degree in Theatre Arts. At times, I'm actually successful!

In the last six or so years, I've become very aware of my privilege as a cis-gendered, heterosexual white man. It's radically shifted my perspective of, well, EVERYTHING, and in particular how I view my own male gamer demographic and the unfulfilled entitlement that spawns much of our resentment and insensitivity. Overcoming that was (and still is) a challenge, and one I am happy to meet. Boy howdy.

Also, the internet tells me I'm INTJ, for those who like four-letter combinations.

I'm in two committed realtionships with foulowl and [404-Not-Found]. Both are awesome and lovely and supportive and I am a stupidly lucky guy for having them in my life.

TL;DR: I'm a sometimes-awkward, late-twenties, polyamorous, Bay Area gamer dork.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working in tech for a living, sipping craft beer for fun, and chilling with my lady. Trying to get back into my homebaking and homebrewing hobbies, but the going is slow. On the backburner is blacksmithing. I am quite proud of the rebar cheese knives I made, but the Crucible is expensive, man.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Finding misplaced objects, baking bread (though it's less "really good" and more "not terrible"), self-mockery, proofreading, carrying groceries, and cat-wrestling.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
People have commented on my eyes, my vocabulary (oh my, it's so big), the sometimes-odd way I emote, my accent (California-raised, but I stretch my vowels weirdly sometimes), and my rings. I like rings. They are... precious to me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Disclaimer: These aren't necessarily my favorites, but they spring to mind quickly.

Authors: N. K. Jemisin, Douglas Adams, Terry Pratchett, China Mieville, Octavia Butler, Alan Moore, and Neil Gaiman.

Movies: Lord of the Rings (they're better than the books and I'll defend that position to the death or the successful refutation thereof), Brick, Princess Mononoke, Alien, The Prestige, Pan's Labyrinth, Star Wars: Episodes IV through VI, the Fifth Element, and Die Hard.

Shows: Bob's Burgers, Adventure Time, Regular Show, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Cowboy Bebop, Buffy, Luther, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, The Office, X Files, Clone High, and the Wire (which may be the most perfect television I've seen).

Music: Most of my music collection is gaming soundtracks, remixes, and chiptunes. Exceptions include Johnny Cash, Daftpunk, and Beyoncé (there is a time and a place for "Blow" to get stuck in your head, and 2:00 PM in the office is NOT it).

Food: Burgers and bread are passions for me, and I can speak at length about both. I'll be happy to tell you why bacon is a poor choice to order on your burger despite how delicious it is. Sandwiches of any kind are high in my esteem. I love Mexican, too (like any good Californian boy). Korean food is fucking amazing. There's an Off The Grid market near my work three times a week; my favorite trucks are KoJa Kitchen, Old World Food Truck, and Rib Whip (solely for Grandma Ruth's buttermilk pie).

Beer: Stouts and IPAs are my favorites, with all manner of Belgian ales close behind. I'm starting to like sours and I'm SO PROUD OF MYSELF. The only style of beer I come close to disliking outright is most types of lagers, and that's just because I'd rather have an ale. In terms of brewers, I like Cascade, Dogfish Head, Lagunitas, Green Flash, Ballast Point, North Coast, Stone, Allagash, and Goose Island (begrudgingly, since Anheuser-Busch owns them).

Video Games: Hearthstone, Binding of Isaac, Nuclear Throne, Spelunky, Fallout, Half-Life, Team Fortress 2, Mass Effect, Portal, Super Meat Boy, and why the hell not, Final Fantasy VII.

TL;DR: I don't think this applies as much here, but here goes. Sci-fi and fantasy, whatever's on the radio, burgers and craft beer, and first-person shooters and indie games.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Entertainment: From games to sci-fi/fantasy novels to sex, having fun is serious business for me.

2. Yeast: In order of priority, beer, bread and kimchi are some of my favorite things to put in my body. Fermentation for the win.

3. Fresh Food, Good Cooking: Avocados, burgers, expensive cheeses, my mom's pie. The application of effort and expertise to well-grown, well-raised organic matter.

4. Information: Namely teh interwebs. And I don't always pay attention to everything, but dammit, I at least want access to knowledge.

5. Rules: Sounds odd, but here's my take: they make language function, they make games enjoyable, and they make sex consensual and fun. Even Calvinball has rules.

6. Companionship: From my girlfriend to my pets. I need the satisfaction and contentment that comes from understanding and being understood by another living thing.

TL;DR: Fun, fermentation, food, facts, fiats, friendship. Okay, "fiats" is a bit of a stretch for "rules," but I was on an alliteration roll.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
In no particular order: wordplay, sex, social justice, dogs, and beer.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Because of the social anxiety I mentioned in my self-summary (which you read in depth of course), I default to staying in to play video games, drink beer, and watch movies with my lady. Thrilling, yes? I do sometimes go out for libations, though!

Crowds of hot young hipsters bother me, so I don't leave my apartment during Art Murmur. No exceptions.

...Okay, well, I'm physically and emotionally capable of making an exception, but I TOTALLY WON'T.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
The serious answer is that I suffer from social anxiety, which turns most interactions with other humans into spiraling analyses of motivation, phrasing, tone, body language, context, and power dynamics.

The less-serious answer is that I secretly covet almost every single dog I see. I take this as a sign that I should, oh, I don't know, GET A DOG, but my current living situation (read: neurotic cat) precludes that possibility.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I can be pretty terrible at making first contact (though it's something at which I'm continuously getting better). If you're interested, send me a message!

That said, you should also message me if:

- You understand and are down with my commitment to my partners.
- You find me attractive and want to determine if I'm worth your time.
- You want to talk about or play video games, talk about or drink beer, or talk about or eat food.

Bonus points if you're experienced with open relationships and the EXCELLENT written and verbal communication skills navigating them requires.

Also, bonus points if you have short hair. But, um, if you have long hair, you still get bonus points. Bonus points for everyone!

TL;DR: When in doubt, go ahead and message me!