There is more to tell about me than I have time to say, now or ever. I live in South Minneapolis for now. I am creative, imaginative, and impractical by inclination, the kind of person who isn't worth much to the world unless he comes with an inheritance, in which case he's the envy of millions. Ill-suited for conventional things and unwilling to settle for less, even if the alternative is having still less than that by virtue of not settling, I am one of the most honest men still alive, an inherently critical individual (though incapable of living up to my own standards), a dreamer, a philosopher, and generally a bizarre fellow.

PS - my Personality Awards are more or less accurate, except for More Adventurous and Less Spiritual, which are understandable misinterpretations. I'm immensely adventurous inside my own head, not so much so in the exterior world, and while I'm vastly spiritualistic, it's in an unconventionally rational/skeptic fashion that's easily mistaken for actual rationalism or skepticism.

I have founded the Spiritual Philosophers' Independent Religious Entity, SPIRE, as the ultimate path to enlightenment and fulfillment of human purpose. Unfortunately, I've been having a little trouble being more specific than that, and thus am not recruiting terribly hard; all are welcome, but until I get organized I can't promise much. I'm currently trying to hang on to a job that I have no personal fondness for past the quality of my coworkers, because my predilections make it difficult for me to find new jobs and I must have a job of some sort in order to pursue my real life work, which includes SPIRE as well as some smaller writing and design side projects that are coming along comparably well.

Memorizing data (name a Magic card, three times out of four I'll know all its vital stats and probably its flavor text; sadly i'm less good at remembering the rules of my job and similar things), dreaming up spectacular new ideas for various fantasy settings (fleshing them out and actually doing something with them is less of a strength), and putting away the potato chips. Not much else that I excel at per se; I'm more of a dabbler. Oh, but I do seem to have a greater than average vocabulary, and am usually a good speller. Many people seem impressed with my ability to spool out page upon page of text (as witness the parts of this profile I've gotten finished so far). I fancy myself a critic and like to think that I can always find a way to improve anything, but most of the recipients do not appreciate this treatment so perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned it. Oops. Tact is not in this column, I'm afraid.

How should I know? I never notice myself. Except occasionally by the smell...er, forget I said that. Next question please.

Music: Almost exclusively rock, with a bit of J-pop and video game scores (hey, a lot of them are pretty good even if I've never played the game in question). Current favorites include Five-Finger Deathpunch, Bloodsimple, Prong, Hurt, Killswitch Engage, Saliva, Puddle of Mud, and Eisbrecher. All-time favorites number in the hundreds, but the names that come to mind right away are Rammstein, Disturbed, Ozzy Ozborne, Evanescence, Lacuna Coil, Rob Zombie, Queens of the Stone Age, Metallica, Nickleback, Three Days Grace, Monster Magnet, In Flames, Linkin Park and Flyleaf. A few non-rock favorites are Enya, Hakim, Weird Al Yankovic, The Endless, Grito Inca, Nate Bucklin, Vivaldi, and Leslie Fish.

Food: I always make sure to eat all four groups of the food pyramid: Salt, Sugar, Grease and Caffeine. I'm sort of a gourmand, but finicky. Prefer caramel and toffee to chocolate. Love meat, hate eggs. Love American cheese, hate most other kinds. Addicted to potato/tortilla chips. Not much for seafood. Think it's stupid to pay more than $10 for a meal no matter what language the cook speaks.

Books: I'm a slow reader, so most of my novel collection remains unread. Off the top of my head, I would name Larry Niven's "Ringworld", the various works of the Lovecraft Mythos, and anything by the late Jack Chalker as major faves; beyond that I'd have to look at my bookshelves.

Games: A major field of interest. In terms of video games, I'm still in the early 90s, and it's not something I spend much time on anymore, though I still enjoy classics like Super Metroid and Final Fantasy VI on occasion. Board games of various sorts entertain me; my far and away favorite is the atmospheric, rules-light "Betrayal at the House on the Hill", and I have too many others to list, though I'm slow to pick up new ones. I'm also an inveterate cardflopper with far more Magic the Gathering cards than any human being needs, though I've at least managed to finally stop buying more.

Movies: The Matrix trilogy is the Star Wars of my generation, though the actual Star Wars of my generation, and the Star Wars of the Star Wars generation, are also fine. (Yes "The Phantom Menace" was painful in places but it had its charms; I don't need to love the whole movie, it was worth seeing if parts of it are good.) Apart from that and "Lord of the Rings", I do have lots of non-trilogy favorites, but they're harder to name off the top of my head. Ghostbusters was a defining experience on my childhood; the first movie I watched in the second phase of my life (I have almost no memories before age 14) was "Powder", though I've yet to watch it again since. My single favorite movie of all time is "Dark City". I'm also addicted to the current crop of superhero movies, though only "Batman Begins" was excellent, and aside from that only the first "X-Men", "Superman Returns" and all three "Spider-man" films were precisely good. Mostly I'm addicted to sci-fi, fantasy and horror (NOT slasher films, but real horror, the kind with monsters), but I do enjoy the occasional intelligent comedy, martial arts bonanza, or straight action flick, and maybe even a romantic comedy if it has a fairly intelligent twist. Oh, and do I need to mention erotic thrillers of every temperature?

Television: I just finished watching season one of "Heroes", which was awesome. "Angel" and "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" are long-time favorites, as are "Stargate SG-1", various Star Treks, James Cameron's "Dark Angel", "Charmed", and various other shows along similar lines. I used to occasionally backslide into sitcoms, but now that I've given up channel-surfing in favor of a roughly $200 and growing DVD collection, I have no time for such things, though I'll make an exception for "Futurama" and possibly "That 70's Show" if I ever find it cheap.

Porn: Most is too stupid to do very much for me, so I'm very picky when buying it. I mostly like "soft" Skinemax-style stuff, though I don't find it on sale much and am unwilling to pay for cable. The work of Andrew Blake and Michael Raven is usually good; most of the rest is barely worth my time, let alone my money. I'm a guy, of course, "naked babes" will always get my attention, but eventually I'll be unsatisfied if there isn't some measure of excellence involved. Just trying to buy porn is an exercise in frustration since 99% of what's sold in stores is crap and you usually can't tell by the packaging. Luckily, I have the Internet. Nuff said.

Every conceivable superhuman ability, Limitless money, Millions of dimensions to explore, A perfectly organized mind, A harem of nymphomaniacal companions, Rulership of the Earth

Drat, I'm not doing so hot....

Impossible fantasy worlds, how any of my day-to-day problems could be solved with some superpower, what the underlying nature of reality and purpose of existence are, the mysteries that are other people's minds, the mystery that is my own mind (I understand myself only slightly better than others and am no less vexed about it), what I'd do if my lottery ticket hit the jackpot...are you sensing a theme here?

At the weekly board & card game party my best friend Richard has been running almost every single week for a couple of decades, well before I came along. We have lots of fun there playing games, talking about whatever, listening to music and eating snacks; it's basically what got me out of my shell when I was 14 and made me start giving a crap about the rest of the human race. Plus, free munchies! :D If you live somewhere in the Metro and would like to drop by sometime, contact me, I'm practically a co-host by now.

I wear white briefs exclusively. One time I was stranded overday at a convention in Bloomington with no way to go home for a change of clothes, went to the Mall of America and bought some undies that were a name brand and thus more expensive than my usual. Later that night, a friend who was at the convention with me sat in such a way that I could see (having never previously desired to inspect his underwear) that he was wearing briefs of the same brand that I had just acquired! Weird.

You want to join SPIRE, you want to talk and strike up a friendship, you find me strangely compelling and can't live without my body....any of these is fine, though I won't hold my breath that they're true of anyone here.