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TomInNapa

44 M Napa, CA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 30–47
  • Near me
  • For new friends, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Today – 4:26pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Technology
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm calm, centered, and contemplative. Yet I also like to be with other people and go on adventures. I'm happy right here in Napa Valley, but I've also enjoyed visiting Italy, France, Brazil, Argentina and India in the past 6 years.

Relationships are important to me -- friends and family. I feel that life is all about the connections we make with other people, and the ways we can make each others' lives better.

I'm optimistic, spiritual (but not religious), curious, compassionate and kind.

For most of my life, I've allowed the logical half of my brain to make decisions. I'm learning to listen to my emotions, and explore my creativity. I go out into this world with an open heart, full of love for others, and able to receive their love in return.

I'm looking to connect with people who are centered and grounded. Confident in who they are. Mature and independent, yet looking for someone to enjoy life with. Someone able to talk openly and honestly about their feelings, and hear me talk openly and honestly about mine. Someone who isn't afraid to love and be loved in return.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working to figure out who I am and what I want out of life, after ending a 10 year marriage to the wrong person. Looking to connect with old friends and find people with shared interests to become new friends. Trying to make the lives of those friends better.

I left my job (writing computer software) for a sabbatical early this year, and have enjoyed the space it's given me to explore, grow and heal.

I spend time reading, climbing at the rock gym, practicing Kundalini yoga, and playing pinball. I have recently been converting my collection of old computer hardware into works of art.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
...writing computer software, something I've been passionate about since I was 13. For me it's a form of creativity, like poetry.

...reading out loud, so if you enjoy the thought of lounging in the great outdoors and being read to, you should message me.

...giving big hugs, snuggling/cuddling, and sharing passionate kisses.

...cooking/baking and I'm not afraid to try new recipes.

...intelligent conversation and having an open mind.

...respecting your boundaries.

...being a son to my wonderful parents (married 46 years!), a brother to my younger sister, and an uncle to my niece and nephew.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My thick, curly brown hair, my green eyes and my smile. And that I look about 5 years younger than I am.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Recently getting back into reading and loving it. I like Neal Stephenson, William Gibson, Ursula Le Guin, Michael Pollan, Michael Lewis, and Malcolm Gladwell. Recent non-fiction includes Awakening Joy, The Untethered Soul, and Ethical Slut.

Recent movies that I enjoyed: Life of Pi, Silver Linings Playbook, Looper, Argo, Moonrise Kingdom, All is Lost, and Guardians of the Galaxy.

I gave up cable so I'm not watching much TV now. I used to keep up with The Newsroom, Game of Thrones, Good Wife, New Girl and Justified. I can't stand sitcoms with a laugh track (sorry Big Bang Theory lovers).

I enjoy a wide range of music, from Jazz to the Beastie Boys, Daft Punk, Pink Floyd, Annie Lennox, The Beatles, Coldplay, Jay-Z, Lenny Kravitz, Moby, No Doubt, and U2.

When it comes to food, I'm an omnivore, but I love vegetables, and don't need meat in every meal (everything in moderation). I also enjoy cooking, baking and grilling.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
family, love/compassion, great food and wine, learning new things, good friends, creating software
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Spending time with people important to me. Maybe out for a walk downtown for drinks and good food. Maybe in for cuddling on the couch with a DVD.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm in two pinball leagues, one of which I started and actively manage. I like to think that it's cooler than a bowling league, but it's still pretty geeky.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You should message me if you want someone interesting to spend time with. You're down to earth and don't wear a lot of makeup. You like to read actual books (Kindle counts).

You're OK being with someone polyamorous. I prefer to be in intimate (romantic/sexual) relationships that are nonexclusive, considerate and fully honest. I will treat you with respect, but I'm not on a path toward marriage and children at this point in my life.

I'm cool with just being friends, if the poly thing isn't for you. I enjoy connecting with others on many levels. Life is a journey made better by our fellow travelers.