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Tomkosmeef

28 M Baltimore, MD

My Details

Last Online
Apr 16
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 9″ (1.75m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly vegetarian
Smokes
Yes
Drinks
Not at all
Drugs
Religion
Christianity, and laughing about it
Sign
Capricorn, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from space camp
Job
Other
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), German (Poorly), Spanish (Okay), Slovak (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I grew up in Indiana, a place of nightmarish flat lands, country
music, and corn. I was trained in the arts of pun-smithing and
culinary ninjitsu. I am divorced, polyamorous, bisexual, and rather nice. Even if you don't find me sexually appealing, we'd probably get along fabulously.

I've lived in many, many other places and I would be happy to regale you. Why spoil everything?
I’m really good at
understanding cat psychology, having a hot dinner on the stove when you get home, unscrewing jar lids (and screwing them back on so tight that you need me to fix it), making delicious soup out of an empty kitchen, not offending people when reasonably requested, and keeping secrets
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm quiet, except for when I have a bad joke or pun to say.
It's like tourette's; I can't help myself.
Other than that, I have no idea.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
This space intentionally left blank. Media is media. Some is more fun to experience than others. None should be rejected wholesale.
The six things I could never do without
Humor, a deliciously sharp knife, nicotine, adventures, science, blankets.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Philisophical questions, paradoxes, overrated literary authors, formulaic plans to obliterate monotony, intelligent thoughts on how to improve the world and then realizing the planet and our species aren't worth improving, or even saving, anyway.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I am an alcoholic. I don't advocate temperance for everyone, so return the favor by not goading me into taking a drink. I'm happy to have a seltzer or tea while you get sloshed!
I’m looking for
  • Guys and girls who like bi guys
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
you have an inclination to do so. I'm open to conversations about anything with anyone. I want to know how your eyes see the world, and what makes your thoughtwaffle crispy.