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29 Baltimore, MD Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–99
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Aug 27
White, Other
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Mostly vegetarian
When drinking
Catholicism, and laughing about it
Capricorn, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from space camp
Less than $20,000
Open relationship
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), German (Poorly), Spanish (Okay), Slovak (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I grew up in Indiana, a place of nightmarish flat lands, country
music, and corn. I was trained in the arts of pun-smithing and
culinary ninjitsu. I am divorced, polyamorous, bisexual, and rather nice. Even if you don't find me sexually appealing, we'd probably get along fabulously.

I've lived in many, many other places and I would be happy to regale you. Why spoil everything?
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Winning it
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
understanding cat psychology, having a hot dinner on the stove when you get home, unscrewing jar lids (and screwing them back on so tight that you need me to fix it), making delicious soup out of an empty kitchen, not offending people when reasonably requested, and keeping secrets
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm quiet, except for when I have a bad joke or pun to say.
It's like tourette's; I can't help myself.
Other than that, I have no idea.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
This space intentionally left blank. Media is media. Some is more fun to experience than others. None should be rejected wholesale.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Humor, a deliciously sharp knife, nicotine, adventures, science, blankets.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Philisophical questions, paradoxes, overrated literary authors, formulaic plans to obliterate monotony, intelligent thoughts on how to improve the world and then realizing the planet and our species aren't worth improving, or even saving, anyway.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
covered in bees.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I sometimes suck my thumb mid-sleep.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you have an inclination to do so. I'm open to conversations about anything with anyone. I want to know how your eyes see the world, and what makes your thoughtwaffle crispy.