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ToothandNail

37 M New York, NY

I’m looking for

  • Everybody
  • Ages 21–45
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Strictly other
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Gemini, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Other
Income
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Likes dogs
Speaks
English (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I think just once I would like to be in a super typical relationship, but run it backwards.

I'd like to get married to someone I don't know at all (though we'd call it a "divorce" for the sake of completeness.) We could have the occasional fight, uninspired maintenance sex, arguments over dumb details, and debate whether it was a good idea to have separate apartments. As a bonus we can each have a "friend" who we pretend we aren't thinking about fucking. Doesn't that sound like fun?

Eventually we will move in together, spend a lot of time enjoying the company of one another, we'll buy each other flowers, and make surprise dinners and snuggle while watching our favorite movies.

After we have given that a fair shot, we'll go on a honeymoon somewhere pleasant, fuck until we bonk, stay naked for days on end eating sushi off one another, not caring that other people think we are ridiculous.

We'll finish the experiment with a divorce (which we'll call our marriage) and then finally a very nice dinner at a two-star restaurant (our first date.)

Then we'll never see one another again. If you decide to turn this into your phd thesis on constructed narrative/image versus emotional experience, or if you develop a movie treatment for the next great romantic comedy, I promise not to infringe your copyright.

- If you think this is a weird idea and you don't get it, we probably aren't going to get along so well.
- If you think its an amusing idea (if kinda cynical) well, I think so too.
- If you think it would be awesome to actually try it, I'm not being completely facetious.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I have a job that would impress you if you are into design, art, architecture, planning, urbanism, social justice, or community organizing. Otherwise you probably wouldn't care.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
"I make obscene telephone calls. The best calls, calls that no one can resist. I have perfected this highly specialized art to the point where, if I wanted to, I could seduce the President of the United States, his wife, his children, his grandparents. But, I have no political ambitions."
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I was born the day Star Wars was released. Same day, same year. The original 1977 version opened in the theaters (before it was called "A New Hope"), the world went nerd-crazy, and I was born. So now I'm trying to make my life retroactively continuous.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
MANOWAR, nick cave/the birthday party, bathory, the pogues, swans, johnny cash, laibach, einsturzende neubauten, kraftwerk, billy bragg, malaria, plasmatics, yoko ono, leonard cohen, the slits, the great kat, public enemy, afrika bambaataa, p-funk, isley brothers, the shitty beatles, black sabbath, acid mothers temple, merzbow, serge gainsbourg, suicide, patti smith, the boredoms, sonny sharrock, captain beefheart, spearhead, the fugs, tom waits, DNA, brian eno, laurie anderson, crass, lee hazelwood, throbbing gristle, phil ochs, neu, pete seeger, negativland, mc chris, will oldham, jerry reed, blind willie johnson, red sovine, billy nayer show, faust, Henry Flynt, naked city, merle haggard, the anthology of american folk music, emmylou harris, bobby beausoleil, E.S.G., uv protection, antipop consortium, the raincoats, art ensemble of chicago, last exit, ennio morricone, sons of the pioneers, harry chapin, danzig, iced earth, mortician, peelander-z, donna summer, GWAR, marty robbins, john cage...
I have embarked on a project to collect everything on the nurse with wound list.

Tarkovsky's Stalker. The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, The Young Girls of Rochefort, The Revolution Will Not Be Televised, The Road Warrior, Death Race 2000, Stanley Kubrick, Rambo First Blood Part II, Shocking Dark, The Haunting (1969), The American Astronaut, Dead Alive, Annie Hall, Spinal Tap, Anvil: The Story of Anvil, American Movie, King of Kong, Alien, The Fountainhead, When We Were Kings, Lost in La Mancha, The Cook The Thief His Wife and Her Lover, Once Upon A Time in the West, Wall-E, The Good The Bad and The Ugly, High Plains Drifter, Black Sheep (as in, zombie sheep!), Rope, Russian Ark, Satantango, If I Should Fall From Grace With God, Fitzcarraldo, The Thin Blue Line, Pumping Iron, Band of Outsiders, Fame, Alphaville, Metropolis, Raiders of the Lost Ark: The Adaptation, Children of God, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, The Lord of the Rings, On Any Sunday, Breaking Away, Better Off Dead, and anything set in NYC in the 70s.

Mostly, I have given up on novels. I just can't deal with the piles of cliches from which they are constructed (cliches which I admit have been worming their way into non-fiction as well.) I do still love re-reading Tolkein or Dune once in a while. And then there is no escaping Blood Meridian. Sweet jesus Cormac Mccarthy, how did you do that?

Other books upon which I depend, or never wanted to leave:
The Ashley Book of Knots, The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat, The Power Broker, Gravity's Rainbow (yes, I read it. It took a year.), Les Miserables (I read the unabridged version, it took a whole summer.), Goedel Escher Bach, A Pattern Language, Silence (John Cage - I read it cover to cover. Stupid me!), Keep the River on Your Right, The Watchmen (and everything else Alan Moore has written.) The Ants, Names on the Land, Bully for Brontosaurus, The Man Who Was Thursday, The Thousand-Mile War, Invisible Cities, Bound For Glory (Woody Guthrie), As I Lay Dying, Great Moments in Architecture, The Book of the New Sun, Confessions of the Guerrilla Girls, The Modernist City, Kon Tiki, Essence of Decision, The Social Life of Small Urban Spaces, The Book of the New Sun, The Gun, The Dark Knight Returns, The New Roadside America, Calvin and Hobbes, The Death and Life of Great American Cities...

The Venture Brothers and The Wire are the only two shows I will admit to unabashedly loving. And half my love of the Wire is my professional interest in cities, so The Venture Brothers is the only one that counts.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I appear to be preparing for the coming apocalypse by stockpiling bicycles instead of weapons. I don't anticipate doing very well.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
bicycles, art in easily distributable forms, stolen art, destroyed art, fakes, hearing, vision, aspidochelone, dancing in the streets, taste, touch, urbanity, bamboo, Brasilia, the apocalypse, wandering albatrosses, wave porn, kalashnikovs, North Sentinel Islanders, paranoia, concertinas, politics, Green Bay Packers, old European motorcycles, pyxes, well made things, cane toads, old things, hand tools, wool, slime molds, meat, food, fear, place, automatic transmissions, ants, sex (yum), bamboo, grand tours (always root for the breakaway!), diatomes and dynamite, Toynbee tiles, eschatology, waxed cotton, skin, teeth, sewers, economics, extreme climates, Svalbard, Yellowknife, copyleft, going native, pontificating, Coconut Crabs(yum, I assume), maps, pre-charged pneumatic rifles, language, rogue-likes, clockwork, figure and ground, landscape, religion, cannibalism, color, pornography, urban legends, haircuts, fashion, categories, names, Robert Moses, Fire Island, turtles, truth, irony, death

And Dwarf Fortress!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Yo! Bum rush the show
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have a thing for people who dress well. Not that I can justify my own total lack of fashion. But at least I appreciate your good taste. Hey, even Bill Cunningham wears the same blue jacket every day.

Holy crap do I hate plastic clothing though. Particularly exercize clothes. Nobody looks good in that stuff.
You should message me if
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You are interested in becoming one of my minions.