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Toshstar

45 Sydney, Australia Man

Man

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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 26–44
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 6:32pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Height
5′ 8″ (1.72m)
Body type
Thin
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and somewhat serious about it
Sign
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Working on Ph.D program
Job
Medicine
Income
Rather not say
Status
Single
Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Japanese (Fluently), German (Fluently), French (Okay), Russian (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I am a physician and humanist Godless monster. Japanese by birth, but left at age three. I'm your classical a INFP in the Jungian MBTI system: Healer, Dreamer and Idealist in a philosophical, socio-political and romantic sense. From Keirsey:

"Idealist men find it relatively easy to express tender feelings, sympathise with others, and have female friends. Idealist men are the most likely to provide romantic dates, an empathetic listening ear, and kindness. Women are likely to appreciate their ability to simply listen without trying to solve problems".

Keirsey writes of the Idealist type that:

"Idealists are so intent on self-realisation that they may be called the Identity Seeking Personality... The reluctance of over ninety percent of humanity to join the search for self-actualisation is a great source of mystification to the Idealist"

Another thing is that I initially come across as a bit conservative, I am told that once you talk to me, I am really nice. You'll be surprised to find I'm as a left-wing as they come.

If get to know me, you may be shocked at how intensely affectionate and idealistically romantic I am. Still waters run deep. Be warned that you have to be emotionally prepared for this and want it in a relationship: merely thinking you might want it isn't enough. You must totally yearn for it with all your Being, and would happily die now than have lived your life without having shared such Stellar Love, or else you will find me a little too intensely starry-eyed.

So, yes, I am human. So, yes, I have excessively lofty aspirations in Love: "Healers (INFPs) have more problems in mating than any other type" (Keirsey). But I deeply and innately have the personality type to be a rewarding companion.

Unlike your average NF type, I have a strong Rational side. That is, I can think with my head as well as with my heart. Jung said: "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling". I wish I were always wise. Φιλοσοφια (philosophia): lover of wisdom.

I also love kids. So if you come with an instant family of unbearably cute young ones... that's just wonderful. You'll find me an adoring daddy figure, who loves to do homework together, spoils kids with endless gifts, overwhelmingly flattered to be entrusted with any chance to babysit, or helping to pick them up from after school care. Nearly, became a paediatrician once upon a time. Not that you'll ever feel upstaged in my affections for you—of course ;)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
♤ Wishing I had the energy to finally write up my PhD thesis on a transplantation topic.
♧ Planning my book on C.G. Jung for the last 20 years without ever getting there
♡ Dreaming about making babies...the joys of fatherhood etc. I adore children.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
♡ Listening to people—my career is based on this, but listening skills are the essence of a relationship
♥ Doting on that someone special in my life
♡ Spoiling Someone Special—this is what I do for fun!
♥ Caring and looking after people—again my career is based on this
♡ Cooking for Her
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
♤ Always extremely well dressed. My style is more vintage (I collect fashion plates), but believe in ethical buying.
♧ Well spoken (I'm told I sound rather private school)—thoughtfully articulate.
☆ Seems aloof (shyness mistaken for professional arrogance), but warmly approachable if you talk to me (ie typical INFP)
☭ Seems conservative, but really a pinko commie type. OK, maybe not so pinko, nor that classic commie either. I admit it: I'm a champagne socialist who reads Marx-Engels-Feuerbach-Adorno in German. If I like Bakunin and Chomsky does that make me an Anarchist?
¥ People always ask if I am half Japanese (the answer to this bizarre question is a big no).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
♥ "Classical" music (I hate this capitalist term and prefer to call it art music) nut from Renaissance to modern avant-garde e.g. Heinrich Isaac, Obrecht, Gesualdo, Monteverdi, Bach, Wagner, Berg, Schoenberg, Webern, Luigi Nono, Stockhausen, Xenakis, Pierre Boulez, & Brett Dean.
☆ Occasional jazz buff e.g. Keith Jarrett, Miles Davis
♡ Can sometimes do the obligatory "cooler" stuff: Sex Pistols, Goldfinger, R.E.M., Bump of Chicken, Garbage, Gojira. Throw anything at me, and I'll sing it straight back at you. But, yawn, the stuff hyped as "cool" (a huge capitalist lie) is so old-fashioned.
♡ Art house movies
♧ Read extensively about history, philosophy, psychology, music, vintage fashion.
✰ Fascinated by Jungian psychological types (Keirsey), re-reading Jung's Gesamelte Werke in German.
☭ Want to study more Adorno (Frankfurt School). Alas, his Gesammelte Werke (Complete Works) just sit on my shelf.
☮ Subscribe to Nature Climate Change.
♥ Favourite book of all time? Possibly Spectres of Marx by Jacques Derrida. He grasps the haunting spectrality of the haunting digital images that flicker on our computers screens when we watch this.
♧ Just finished Thomas Piketty's Capital in the 21st Century, next stop Das Kapital in German
✰ Literary: Heinrich Heine, Friedrich Hölderlin, Goethe, Hermann Hesse, Rainer Maria Rilke. After feeling like the only person on this site who hasn't read Haruki Murakami, I've brought a couple of his books—in the original Japanese, but struggle to stay awake...
♀ I've read more feminism than any woman I've ever dated. Love Naomi Wolf. If you go one up on me here, you double your brownie points. I've exchanged emails with Shere Hite (she is just awesome).
☯ Yes, I do enjoy cooking and doing it really well. It's just a matter of honing in on a person's personal tastes and preferences. Have the Larousse Gastronomique on the shelf.
☞ Oh gosh, I sound so bookish don't I? I do love cycling, bushwalking, and I can ski. You'd better be fit enough to keep up with me!
☆ My macroeconomics phase is over. New blind obsession du jour = photography. Derrida's book on the subject Copy Archive Signature fascinates me. How do you feel about modelling for me? I'll teach you how ;)
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
♥ Love and the devoted self-sacrifice needed for this.
𝄢 Music because it is like the profoundest inner vision for me
❡ Innermost peace
♥ A heartfelt yearning to seek the truth
✰ A willingness to learn and to be deeply humbled
♧ Compassion
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
♥ Love in its deepest philosophical and personal sense.
ℑ Music, musicology e.g. why is pop-rock music still written in such an old fashioned diatonic-homophonic music language like it was still the Victorian era?
☯ History, political and social philosophy, art theory, existentialism, feminism, psychology, climate change.
☮ How to find inner peace and truth
♨ Why I keep reading Jacques Lacan when his ideas exasperate me so much...and also why he is so trendy in literary circles...gasp...
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
• at home reading, listening to music, blogging
• at a concert
• at the movies
• taking you out to dinner
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Hopeless clotheshorse
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
In case this profile freaks you out, I should mention that I don't routinely spout post-modernism, dodecaphonic composition, post-Marxist theory, or molecular medicine over breakfast (unless it turns you on). If you got the impression that I am trying to scare away anyone whose only idea of a "good read" is a trashy magazine, then you have understood me correctly.

It is truly a rare person whom I trust enough to ever share my deepest thoughts on such esoteric things, and I mostly speak where such things inspire, comfort and reassure us deeply and profoundly. Underneath my thin veneer of cool intellectuality, I am all starry-eyed idealist.

The two classic types based on Jungian MBTI personality typing as to who is an ideal match for an INFP type are:

1. ENFJ: possibly—but not necessarily—a Teacher. A warm Extrovert, with a born ability to draw the best out in people. Great at getting people to do things because of a iNtuitive ability to get under people’s skins, and into their hearts. Warm hearted and sensitive with people’s Feelings. An Idealist, with a heartfelt vision for a better world. An Idealist in Love and one who yearns for this idealistic Love to be reciprocated.

2. ENTJ: a born Leader, smart, and always right...dammit! Quick to Judge. Intimidating to some, but can be charming. Clicks with someone who appreciates an uncompromising authenticity and an uncanny meeting of minds. Values someone who is a sounding board for their innermost thoughts. Classic ENTJ: Paul Keating.

The idea is that there should be a balance of "similar" and "opposite" between a couple. However, the only published study failed to fully confirm the classic theory and suggested that Idealists (any NF type) are probably most happy with Idealists in general. However, I do have a far stronger Rational streak to me than the vast majority of immature Idealist types (who tend to be a bit rainbows and unicorns), so there is room for compatibility there with Rational (NT) types.

If you want to know what your MBTI personality type is then I suggest that you take this test.

For skeptics, I can only say that this is an infinitely better way of finding a match than a horoscope. Don't leave finding a partner to the stars, or to random chance, and take control of your destiny. You only live once, so what have you got to lose by giving it a try? After a lifetime of blundering from relationship to relationship with the wrong types, you might find it a total revelation.

Lastly, if you are deeply religious, a climate change science denier, or a medical science denier (i.e. so anti-mainstream medicine that you think that vaccinations and evidence-based medicine are some weird conspiracy) then we mightn't get on so well!

*N.b. translation for humanist = Godless monster (God-zilla) :) Kindly take note before sending me your message saying "God bless you"