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Tosshi

33 M Houston, TX

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Today – 8:13pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
A little extra
Diet
Anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Atheism, and laughing about it
Sign
Taurus, and it’s fun to think about
Education
University
Job
Other
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Has dogs
Speaks
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a lover El Ultimo tacos, a bit of a beer snob, and fan of Luchadeer. A native Houstonian (with tours in Toronto and DFW) that pines for the biting cold, and loathes humidity. I spend my free time gaming, reading, checking out art exhibits, finding the worst movies or best documentaries on Netflix, or going out to a dive. I'm always checking for local festivals or events; a small game night or a massive cultural festival are equally appealing. I may have a shelf of Hellboy comics and ridiculous Steam backlog, but that doesn't mean I'm afraid of the outdoors and socializing (my being ginger makes me afraid of sunlight, thank you much).

I grew up on a steady diet of Bill Hicks and Richard Pryor. My sense of humor and general outlook on life reflects this, but being cynical just isn't that much fun. I'd rather improve my life with new experiences. It can be something small like a new beer or book, exploring side streets downtown, not just globetrotting plans. I think it's extremely important to experience other people's cultures and perspectives. I think this is what Bill Hicks would have wanted.

Conan (Barbarian, not Ginger) was wrong. What is best in life is burgers.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working on getting into shape again. I was a basketball player in school, and being sedentary isn't all it's cracked up to be. As of this update I'm down 75lbs and counting. Talking about workout regimens is boring, but if you're active and like the zen-like atmosphere of the gym we can commiserate over that.

Slowly renovating my house. Amazing what replacing beige walls with bright paint will do for a place.

I've been tinkering with learning programming. I wrote a text adventure!

Planning a million trips I want to take such as hiking to the top of Mount Fuji, taking rail across Europe, or something simple like going camping in Lost Maples.

Daydreaming about zero calorie burgers.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Playing dominoes and talking copious amounts of shit.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My ginger beard definitely attracts the most comments. I have no problem with this.

I'm overly verbose. I wanted to be a writer, but hate editing. Hopefully I don't come off as a dude that likes the sound of his own voice.

That I invited you for burgers.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Food: All of it. Except mushrooms, pickles, and olives.

Authors: American Gods is the novel I can always return to. The Hobbit was the most formative book of my youth. Terry Pratchett and Patrick Rothfuss keep my childlike wonder honest. Neal Stephenson may be my favorite person in the world for naming a character "Hiro Protagonist." Just started Ancillary Justice; throw more female sci-fi/fantasy author recommendations at me.

Music: Faith No More, Alice in Chains, and UGK are my Mount Rushmore of music. I'm always months (OK, years sometimes) behind on new stuff unless we're talking local rappers. Doolittle and Run The Jewels may be perfect albums. Freddy Mercury is the greatest vocalist ever, but Mike Patton gives him a run for the money. If you hang out with me you'll find lots of quality local rap beyond Chopped and Screwed.

Movies: I once reworked the opening scene to The Godfather as a monologue for a theater class project. A perfect night includes quoting Tombstone. Edgar Wright is my spirit animal. Korea in the last 15 years rivals America in the 70s for outstanding creative output.

TV: The Wire is obviously the greatest show ever. Community kind of went off the rails, but those first two seasons were magic. I really miss new episodes of House. I will take Orange Is The New Black over House of Cards a million times. If you made me choose between Wire Idris Elba or Luther Idris Elba I would pout and refuse to play. I wish those first two seasons of The Boondocks were widely recognized as being the brilliant satire they are.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Spartacus, my overly attached dog
2. Twitter, the ultimate time waster and communication tool all in one
3. Afternoons spent browsing the Home Source warehouse for renovation/design ideas
4. Houston food/drink scene, especially irresponsibly large Hickory Hollow chicken fried steak
5. Topo Chico, like, a LOT of Topo Chico
6. Nights spent cooking and watching really terrible movies on Netflix
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Write-ins for Cards Against Humanity that would make my mother very disappointed in how she raised me.

Whether my favorite Simpsons quote is; "Purple Monkey Dishwasher" or "Sorry it's not in packages."

The dark and meaningless existence I led prior to Frank's Red Hot.

Batman. Just in general.

Recreating the Endor treehouses in my backyard.

Going on one of the paid paleontologist digs to live out my childhood fantasies.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Playing Cards Against Humanity and drinking some beer. Going to Hans' to play bocce ball, Calvinball edition. Sitting on a patio at D&T or Grand Prize. Taking my dog to The Boneyard. Sitting down with the weeks game releases. Tracking down food trucks all over town. Playing tourist.

I may or may not have spent a number of Friday nights at a trampoline gym digging myself out of the foam pit.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm hopelessly addicted to HGTV/DIY Channels.

I cannot dance, at all. I lack any sense of rhythm. Can't whistle either.

I have several beauty products dedicated to the care of my beard. Blame my best friend.

I don't change the song if something from Prince's Batman soundtrack comes up on shuffle.

I don't own a single pair of plain white socks.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to cuss and discuss over burgers. You want to make really lame #hashtag jokes. You think Hank Scorpio is the ultimate Simpsons character, or prefer the "Tomacco" episode over "Monorail." You'll hold impromptu car karaoke, perhaps Queen or the entirety of Doolittle. You'll attend NBA games with me, and happily scream at the refs even when they're right. If you'd sit upon the Famicom throne in Akihabara. You want to go eat something you've never heard of before.