Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

TouchBrian

33 M Oakland, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 8:40pm
Orientation
Bisexual
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 7″ (1.70m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Sign
Sagittarius, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Job
Income
Relationship Status
Seeing Someone
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

Similar Users

My self-summary
I am a loving, loyal, communicative, playful, kinky, cuddly,
bi-sexual, (1.8-ish on the kinsey scale) switch (almost exclusively dominant with women but still flexible and tend to be submissive with men) male. I was introduced to polyamory 13 years ago and have been more deeply exploring alternative sexuality in the Bay Area for the past 10 years. I more identify with creating "openly defined" relationships rather than polyamory. I am personally attracted to the model of having one deeply committed partner and then integrating our lovers into the partnership but still having openness and fluidity within that ideal structure. However I'm currently transitioning out of a partnership of the last 2.5 years and plan on openly dating for a long while.

I have a very high standard and commitment to the intention of always being able to return to a place of friendship if a romantic/sexual relationship isn't serving or working anymore. This fundamentally means staying committed to finding the most appropriate relationship which could also mean ending a partnership but still staying lovers. It is important that whomever I get deeply involved with is willing to live up to this commitment and work through whatever needs to get resolved to be able to get back to a place of friendship or find the most appropriate relationship. Because of this value and standard, I am close friends with a past partner, occasionally reconnect with other past partners as friends, in and out of being sexual with a lover of 7-8 years, been regular lovers with woodnympho for the past 5 years and will am in flux with my recent partnership that is in transition but staying in close connection.

With all of my lovers and partners of the past 7-8 years I've explored kink, D/s dynamics. My desire to delve deeper into those dynamics and exploration is getting stronger. As a Dom I'm both very loving, kind and patient but firm, direct, demanding and know what I want. I'm also open and flexible, enjoying meeting my sub where they're at while still getting what I want out of it. I enjoy introducing individuals to BDSM by making it more light and playful, as it doesn't have to be this serious and intense thing. As I often say, when I bring up BDSM and people say "oh, I'm not into that stuff!" I respond with "well, do you enjoy being nibbled on your neck, having your nipples pinched, hair pulled or being held down?" and they're normally like "oh yeah, I like most of those things" and I say "well to me that all falls under BDSM, there's just a wide spectrum". In addition, even though I lean towards rough play and BDSM it doesn't mean that I can't be adaptable and play with people in other ways as I enjoy a wide spectrum of sensuality and sexuality.

Some of favorite activities include any combination of the following; dance (especially contact improv), yoga, massage (giving and receiving), acrosage (massaging someone while lifting them off the ground with your feet), dolphin dance (contact improv in water), soaking in hotsprings, hanging out on the beach (especially tropical), being in nature, intentional journeys through medicinal substances (ayahuasca, peyote, etc.), less intentional recreational drug induced adventures, self-improvement/exploration classes/workshops, cuddling, passionate kissing, wrestling (one of my fav!!), mind blowing sex (everything from the sacred to the profane), playing with kink (BDSM, ropes, roleplays, fantasies, etc.), threesomes/foursomes, play parties and anything adventurous.
What I’m doing with my life
I have a private massage practice, specializing in Aquatic Bodywork and Thai Couples Massage. Since I have a pool in my living room (yep you read it right) with a movie projector above the pool and have a great space in general, I aspire to host monthly events out of my home with themes mostly around movement/dance, massage/touch and open sensuality/sexuality but also just simple movie nights while we float around in the pool.

I'm currently focused on continuing to work on the foundation of my life through staying focused on my ToDo's throughout the day (something I've been working on improving for years), growing my massage practice, staying physically active ideally through self defense classes and dancing as much as I can, especially at Ecstatic Dance.

As I mentioned above, I'm currently transitioning out of a partnership. We are doing it lovingly and as ease-fully as possible. I feel deeply grateful to be able to transition out of a partnership this way, in love and connection while acknowledging the reality that we're not meant to be partners even though it's painful to let go.
I’m really good at
Giving and receiving massage.
Long embracing hugs and/or cuddles.
Clear and responsible communication.
Inspiring trust and comfort in people.
Creating comfortable and enjoyable first time experiences.
Rope bondage, spanking, hair pulling, rough play, wrestling...
The first things people usually notice about me
Physically: My glasses with bamboo frames and my attentive eye contact.
Energetically: My presence, calmness, and groundedness.

I also often get that I look like Edward Norton and even stranger I get that I sound like him, once from someone in a locker room that couldn't even see me just could hear me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Well, I don't read books often. Might have something to do with growing up with a speech impediment. Been making myself read lately, recently finished Passionate Marriage and just starting The Multi-Orgasmic Man.

I'm not a huge movie buff either but some of my favorites are; Baraka, Samsara, Qatsi-Trilogy, Ashes and Snow, Waking Life, Avatar, Matrix, Inception, Borat, Bruno, Ali G, Short Bus, Secretary. I don't have a TV but I do enjoy watching The Daily Show and Ted.com videos while eating breakfast or dinner.

My favorite musicians are; Beats Antique, Bassnectar, Glitch Mob, Lynx and Janover, Goddess Alchemy Project, Michael Franti, Brett Dennon, Bjork (my all time fav), Portishead, Sig Ros, U2, Thievery Corporation, Telepop Musik, Regina Spektor, Imogen Heap, Sia, Frou Frou, and more...

I am committed to keeping my food local and organic whenever possible. I am an omnivore now but was either vegetarian, vegan or raw for over 10 years. Been eating out a lot lately not cooking at home as much as I used to but changing that in 2014. I normally go with a Red Curry at a Thai restaurant, next comes Sushi and then Mexican but a favorite is Venus in Berkeley. I do enjoy other ethnic foods on occasion and enjoy fine dining experiences often.
The six things I could never do without
Freedom
Friends
Community
Dance
Sensuality/Sexuality
My iPhone and MacBook Air
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The state of the world and what will come of it. Wanting to be self sufficient and living sustainably yet enjoying the lifestyle I have now. How to move forward on creating a service that is mobile, basically a business I can travel with and do from a tropical beach or wherever there is WiFi. What I'd do if I won the lotto (and yes I actually play it weekly). How to improve my life and continue creating the life I truly want to live.
On a typical Friday night I am
Friday nights aren't completely typical but tend to just stay in and enjoy a chill night in. More typically, I attend Ecstatic Dance in Oakland on Wednesday nights and Sunday mornings.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've waxed my own genitals. Yes it hurts but it's not that bad after the first two times ;)
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–33
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
Socially interested:
Feel free to message me about anything!

Romantically interested:
You are female (currently not seeking men to play with)
You're already into or interested in open relationships.
You want to start a conversation on here to explore possibilities between us
You enjoy dancing and want to meet up at Ecstatic Dance.
You wanna meet up and do some AcroYoga/Acrosage
You wanna go rock climbing
You want to meet over coffee/tea or breakfast/lunch/dinner
You wanna play with ropes/bondage or kink play in general (these go to the top of my list)
You're interested in knowing about the events I hold out of my space.

Disclaimer: I don't tend to respond to one liners and especially from those that are out of state and have less than a 80% match with not much to say like "Hey".