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28 Perth, Australia Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–35
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 5:28am
6′ 4″ (1.93m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Atheism, and very serious about it
Libra, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Politics / Government
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I'm a self-absorbed schizoid fantasist with a penchant for absurd inanities. Also, I like cats.

I'm willing to try new things and do whatever dumb shit you want me to. Do you want to go the beach and have a splash? I'll be there.... Shall we go to the dance floor and gyrate? With a lot of encouragement, I might just do that. Shall we laugh at people who don't know the difference between "your" and "you're" and congratulate ourselves on our superior intelligence? I'm in!

I think I'm a nice person and I think I'm very warm. I never intend to be snide... okay, I like being mocking at times.... I don't like when it's two people feeling good because they think they are superior to others... that really shits me... unless it's funny.

I try to be honest but it always feels like an abortion and the truth changes depending on my mood.... but everything else is kind of just boring to me.

"One doesn't want appreciation... one wants response. To tell you the truth, I don't know what I want of you, or of anybody for that matter. I want more than I get, that's all I know. I want you to step out of your skin - I want everybody to strip down, not just to the flesh, but the soul."

Oh ya, and I work and eat and shit.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Deplorable mania, when something happens, to inquire what.

Aside from the usual grind, I'm just doing my best to stop myself from becoming stupid. I believe all the 'use it or lose it' bullshit, so I try and stay as mentally active as possible. Mostly just worrying about how stupid I'm getting. I read a book or two a week, watch movies, play video games... I guess it's not much of a plan but I guess it depends on what you're reading, what you're watching, etc. I played chess for a bit, that was pretty fun.... and I like to sing. I sing a lot..... sometimes strumming the guitar terribly.

As for life goals, I'm not really sure. I don't really want much stuff.... I just want to meet some interesting people and see how I feel after that.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Yodeling. I'm a second degree black belt in the art of the yodel. Also gurgling. I can gurgle all night.

I'm good at video games which, as you can imagine, makes me very popular with the ladies. I will argue with you about how amazing video games are if you start with me, or make a face or something.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
These are my heroes at the moment: Morrissey, Larry David, Samuel Beckett, Batman, Witold Gombrowicz, Milan Kundera, Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, Thom Yorke, Jack Handey, Louis CK.

I read Portnoy's Complaint by Philip Roth a couple of months ago and thought it was brilliant. I'm definitely reading more by him.

I read a lot of classic sci fi and fantasy as well. Some are quite pulpy but some are really good.... I like Jack Vance and Theodore Sturgeon... Lord of Light would have to be up there too...and I've loved I Am Legend for over a decade... it is way better than the movie which makes no sense (the movie makes no sense, not the fact that the book is better, just to clarify, for your records, whatever).

TV wise I like most comedies. I'm re-watching It's Always Sunny at the moment. Loved Workaholics and Nathan For You. All time favourites are The Office, Arrested Development, Seinfeld, Peep Show, and Curb.

I like all the usual Breaking Bad, yadayada too.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. Donuts - although I think krispy kreme are overrated. Sometimes I fantasize about opening my own gourmet shop. People focus too much on the glaze these days but it's not about the glaze. It's about the texture!

2. Sex - I don't need to be having it, just the fact that it exists is enough for me to... continue existing. And this ties into my next answer:

3. Unrealistic Goals - A man's reach should exceed his grasp or what's a heaven for?

4. Spiders - If there weren't spiders there would be heaps of flies and we'd suffocate on them.... did you hear about the old lady who.... ah never mind.

5. Food - I like to make artwork out of it.... just smear it all over.

6. Oxygen - Otherwise my bombs wouldn't explode.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Most of the time I'm utterly bewildered.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Getting drunk with a mate and moping, and then we go out among the common folk and revel a bit... do a bit of revelling... I'd say we achieve successful revel about 15% of the time. Then we come home and discuss places to meet girls. I suggest Church... I think it's an untapped market, my friend disagrees... the discussion rages for hours. Obviously, it's all ridiculous because we have the social skills of gnats... and not even the common house gnat or whatever.... some other weird undiscovered sub species of gnat.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sometimes when I'm walking I listen to "Seven Nation Army" by the white stripes in my head.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
I have no idea. If you're not completely repulsed already.... that's a good start.